Why parents drink
A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see that his bed was
nicely made and everything was picked up.
Then he saw an envelope propped up
prominently on the pillow that was addressed to Dad.
With the worst premonition
he opened the envelope with trembling hands and read the letter.
Dear Dad:
It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you.
I had to elope with my
new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you.
I have been
finding real passion with Stacy and she is so nice.
But I knew you would not approve of her because of all her piercing, tattoos,
tight motorcycle clothes and the fact that she is much older than I am.
But
it's not only the passion... Dad she's pregnant.
Stacy said that we will be very happy.
She owns a trailer in the woods and has a
stack of firewood for the whole winter.
We share a dream of having many more
children.
Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really
hurt anyone.
We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other
people that live nearby for cocaine and ecstasy.
In the meantime we will pray
that science will find a cure for AIDS so Stacy can get better.
She deserves
it. Don't worry Dad.
I'm 15 and I know how to take care of myself.
Someday I'm sure that we will be
back to visit so that you can get to know your grandchildren.
Love, your son John
PS: Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Tommy's house.
I Just wanted to
remind you that there are worse things in life than a report card.
That's in my
center desk drawer.
I love you.
Call me when it's safe to come home.
COMMENTS
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queenmorbid
13:22 Mar 25 2008
LMAOOOOOOOOOOO That was hilarious. So true too. They do give us a reason to drink at times.