So last week I did go to Family services to apply for food stamps and temp. assistance.
After sitting there for over two hours it was finally my turn. I went into a little 8x8 room with a desk and two doors., One I walked in and on the other side one that the case worker walked in.
First thing she asked me...........do you get child support?
Nope, we share custody and so there is no support paid to either party.
Well we have to go after child support.
No you don't. The court set it up this way and we don't do that.
Well we have to show that you have the boys more than 50% of the time and get child support.
Well I don't. We split it 50/50 there is no money involved and there can't be. Next month he may be in the same situation that I am and there is no way you are going to force him to pay anything.
But we have to. You are asking for temp. assistance so we have to get child support.
Well then take that request off there and just see if I can get the food stamps.
I can't we still have to go after him for support.
(at this point I was in tears)
Lady, there is no way you can do that to him. He is a good dad and neither of us has the means to be paying support to the other. This has been this way for six years. I am just asking for assistance for food stamps.
Well I can't help you with out going after support from him.
Well can I apply for stamps just for me?
(she looked at me like I had two heads)
NO you can't.
(now tears streaming down my face and choking back the heaving crys)
Fine then please tear up all the papers. Obviously we cannot come to an agreement. I won't let you go after support from him and therefore you cannot help me. Thanks for nothing.
I got up and walked out of there.
It was so hard to be in that situation. I have never been there before and when I go they deny me. I don't understand our system! I see thousands of ppl getting assistance w/o a problem. Matter of fact they aren't even trying to work. And here I am caught in a stupid economical trap and they want to screw me even more. I wonder how many other single moms who work their ass off to make a home for their family and then got laid off are now in the same situation that I am. This doesn't make sense at all.
I keep thinking that I am in a horrible nightmare and I can't wake up.........
Well, it's been two weeks now that I have been unemployed. Last week I pretended that I was on vacation and didn't stress over it. This week I decided to do the same.
However, every day for the last 14 days I have been on monster.com and craigslist looking for something to do.
There are lots of insurance agent jobs out there.......I guess because its commission based and because when you have to cut back one of the first things you cut back.....is insurance.
I saw a few bank positions on there.....called on them......turns out those offices are now closed .....due to cut backs.....lol
Guess I am just gonna keep pretending I am rich and don't need to work.........:-/
Starting Monday I join the ranks of many American Unemployed. It seems my company has gotten down to letting the best of the best go and knocking them off by senority. These days and times are rough and no one is safe from losing their job.
I am trying to look at the positive side of it.........hahaha.......
I will be on a sort of vacation :o)
I am going to pretend that I am on vacation this next week. Monday I will go and get all the employment things out of the way. I think I applied for unemployment but, you have to do it on line and that was damn confusing. Then I need to apply for food stamps and something else I don't know what its called but because I have children I was told there is emergancy help available. I have to say I am on new ground here and feel quite ashamed that I have to have help. But I will do what I need to to take care of my boys.
I haven't worked on a resume in so long I forgotten what to do or say........
Matter of fact I was staring at it and couldn't get past my objective......lol
I don' t thing they want to hear that my main objective is not to lose my home....
Every thing happens for a reason, this I know. ......and as one door closes others open........ I am certain I will find something soon. I am very good at what I do and I can do most anything.
Things will be ok.....I am extreamly lucky to have family and beloved friends to kick my ass when I start to get down .
It will all be fine.......there is something bigger and better out there I just know it..
About a year ago a hawk came to the conclusion that she would be alone in her journey through life. Once her young grow up they will fly away to build their own nest and families leaving her alone......There had been plenty of animals that have come across her path, but none ever stayed for too long. So Lady Hawk decided that it is what it is and stopped searching for that one special someone. Winter was long and hard for her. The bitter winds cut through her feathers like glass, but she wrapped her feathers around herself tighter and braved it. Just before spring some animals started poking their nose out to test the weather....one ventured into Lady Hawks area and caught her attention, at that same time an old Graywolf crossed Lady Hawks path but she only caught a glimpse of it. Something about it intrigued her and made her curious. Soon she would see the wolf from time to time, not certain of what would come of it. Graywolf fascinated Lady Hawk with his stories and tales of adventures. He told stories of his travels across the world and things that made him happy and sad. Lady Hawk looked forward to their time together. Graywolf brought great pleasure to Lady Hawks life. Soon she found herself wanting to see more of the wolf but, wasn't sure of how Graywolf felt of her. Did he want to just eat her and move on? Or was there more to the wolf than what he was showing her. After a few months of casual meetings and sharing of spirits and hot meals, Lady Hawk found herself thinking of Graywolf in a more intimate way. But the little mouse that was pestering her kept getting in the way of her seeing the wolf. Lady Hawk had to take care of the situation and ate the mouse to eliminate that obstacle. Now she was free to see Graywolf with no worries of anything except him eating her. Soon Lady Hawk and Graywolf became quite close. Sharing stories and spending time together. Lady Hawk soon found herself feeling lonely when the wolf wasn't around. She craved his attention. When they are together she can stretch out her wings and feel the breeze blow through them as Graywolf stands by her side and they travel together. She can tell that the wolf holds back a great deal. He says its from past scars and hurts that he is very careful and cautious. So Lady Hawk has grown patience with Graywolf because she has opened her heart to him and gives herself to him completely. No one has ever been able to hold her heart and caress it in their hands. Knowing full well that the wolf could burst her heart with one bite she has given it to him freely and with no regret. She thinks of no other animal in the forest ever. She has made a place in her nest for Graywolf to feel safe and rest with no worries. She showers Graywolf in love and affection..........he is never neglected in any way. When Lady Hawk flies now she flies high and soars across the lands with a swollen breast that shows how happy and complete she feels with Graywolf. They never have cross words with one another. Graywolf likes to pick at her feathers and try to ruffle them. But Lady Hawk takes it all in stride and lets it all roll off her feathers.
One night something was bugging Graywolf something fierce. Was it insecurity? territory? love? Whatever it was it caught him in quite the bad mood. Lady Hawk caught the brunt of it all. Sharing some of her places of entertainment with Graywolf, Lady Hawk was attacked off guard. She didn't have her guard up because she was with the only person in the world that she knew she was safe with........but to her surprise it was that person that attacked her. Things were going pretty good. She was showing him a fun place with good food and tasty spirits. She only left his side for a few minutes to find better seating. Things were ok. Then after eating she thought it would be nice to show him the rest of the area so she ventured out to find another place to sit....when he got to her she was shocked that something had gone terribly wrong! He was angry with her! He insisted that she had deserted him. He smashed his drink down soaking her and everyone near them. Lady Hawk felt her heart hurt as he squeezed it so tight she could hardly breathe. Confused and disoriented she went after Graywolf, begging him to understand that that wasn't her intention and that she was only trying to please him and show him a good time. Graywolf was blinded by anger and didn't want to hear anything Lady Hawk had to say. Her heart was hurting, she could feel the hot blood start to ooze from it as Graywolf headed out of sight. She managed to fly to hims den without killing herself or anyone else. Her head was swimming with the events that lead to this moment. This had to be a horrible nightmare she was in, this couldn't really be happening. They have been so good together how could they be here?! She was so confused that when she got to him she didn't know what to say. She was hurt from being called horrible names and acused of lies! How could Graywolf ever think that Lady Hawk would do such a thing to him. He holds her heart in his hand.........does he not know how precious that is? She wanted to stay and talk with him and fix it, but his eyes glowed so much anger she couldn't take seeing him. He told her she could stay but, Once again putting him before herself she asked what he wanted, ...........he wanted her to go away so he could think. So with blood flowing down her breasts and tears burning her face feathers dragging the floor she left. Turning back to see if maybe he would take her back in but his den turned dark. So now Lady Hawk sits in her nest alone, trying to make sense out of it all......and praying that Graywolf will soon call......if only he would talk to her.
Why doesn't he see ...............how can he not feel how much she loves him? Where did all this come from? She loves only him. Her heart bleeds for him........begging only to be loved by him...........
COMMENTS
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lestatsbride
15:20 Jan 16 2009
belive me i hate them too
my kids were placed by dss and in foster care just recently i went for help too to get temp and food stamps
shit the guy made me cry i walked out also
i said they took my kids u should help what the hell is wrong with u people we have to pay child support to the state since they took our kids