.................the time has come13:50 Apr 11 2009
Times Read: 678
Where do I even start.....it has taken me all week to finally get online and do anything. Tuesday, April 7th, around 1230pm cst. I got a call. Its time to be at the hospital. If you want to see Him alive come now. My heart sunk to my toes, I couldn't breathe, my eyes burned with tears, my whole body shivered, my blood started to pump hard.......the 45 minute drive seemed like 45 hours. I tried to tell myself that this is ok. This is what is suppose to happen. Its time......
I had just seen Him the weekend before so no more than 7 days had passed, but when I stepped into the room I nearly died. My Knight in shining armor was wide-eyed and confused. No tubes or anything to keep him alive, just a few patches to monitor his vitals and a little bit of oxigeon (sp) There was Gma sitting at His bedside holding His hand and telling Him it would be ok but He cannot get out of bed. I swollowed hard and fought back the tears as I stepped up to His side. I leaned over and kisses His bald head and whispered, I love you Grandpa, its Ann. He just looked at me with those cloudy blue eyes that have now lost their richness, and nodded His head a bit and squeezed my hand.
He spent the next few hours trying to get out of bed. He could sit himself up some what and although it was garbled He insisted that we let Him out of bed because..........He had to go.
At first, I asked if He had to pee and He said yes. So we explained to Him that he didn't have to get up to do that and He wouldnt mess the bed. But then like someone touched me or reminded me I realized what He was really needing to do or wanting to do. He kept saying He needs to go.........everyone said where too? and/or you cant. What He was really doing was trying to leave this life. It was time for Him to GO. I watched Him that day go from fighting us girls and trying to cuss (hee hee, that was cute) to later that afternoon, there was no fight anymore, no cussing, no talking, no acknowledgement. His vitals had some what stablized, bp 119/57 hr 90s He just lay there sort of staring up at the ceiling.....but I could see that He was watching something. I know the angels were there to take Him home. He did sleep a bit till the nurses came in to flip him......Grrrrrr. Scared the shit out of Him and me!! I left knowing ........... I gave Him tons of kisses on His head, I whispered that the boys loved him and it was ok if He needed to go now. I am so glad to know that the last thing I said to my Grandfather was I love you so much.
My Grandfather passed away April 8th around 7am cst. 79 yrs young, left behind His wife, 2 daughters, 1 step daughter, 5 grand-daughters, 1 grandson, 11 great-grandchildren.
He had a full military career, retired twice once from the US Air Force and then from Chrysler. He was married twice, two full lifetime marriages.
He had a very full life..........I have been told that He said He had no regrets :o)
That is the way I want to die!
I LOVE YOU PAPA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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