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Have I stopped my search? Or am I merely looking inward for temporary solutions? I seem to have been unable to notice the halt in my progress for the emotions I've been dealing with. Where to pick up again, to start scripting the rest of my life. To shed old feelings, and behaviors is a good point to go from.



Have you bothered looking at me? Seeing through the face into the soul and mind? You may read my words but you seem to never have let them touch you. Or merely you are not open to them and think me queer for writing these which are my thoughts, and yet not my thoughts but teachings of outside influence. I am of my surroundings and as my master would be contented by my actions and "morals." I believe myself to be a simple man, then perspective changes with every mind and pair of eye's. Love, peace of mind, people to teach what bit of wisdom I may bestow upon them. A loving woman to hold, to cause a smile in my heart that would cause any persons spirit to soar. To cause a happiness in her soul and face to brighten all who may be graced to glance upon them.



You see I am not so different from you, my blood bleeds red, my skin scars, the tears fall even if they are masked. I smile so that you should not worry, I constantly brood so more will not need to. "The most important thing is to find out, what is the most important thing." I've found mine, so that you can continue to search for yours. I see my role in this life, i'll be left wanting though I can live with that.



i've referenced, and quoted two great minds, Mark Twain, and Shinryu Suzuki.

I am the shoulder you cry on,

I am the one who gives you counsel.

My emotions become involved,

I must subdue them.

What must you tell me?

Again he has hurt you,

My shoulder I offer.

My feelings I cannot tell,

the tear runs down my cheek.

Though I wipe it before it falls upon your hair

Friends we remain as it must.

Always the confided,

Never the reason to confide.

I shall understand you more,

and you shall understand me less.

You say I am mean, that I am cold,

I apologize for pushing you away.

I had to fix my mask.

For it had a crack in it,

Now what is it you must tell me.

He has hurt you again,

The tear runs down my cheek.

Will I let it drop this time?

Let me fix my mask,

The crack is larger this time.

Again you rest your head upon my shoulder,

we fall asleep, I wake and the tear begins to form.

This time you wake and wipe it from my cheek.

You ask why I cry,

I must lie, but instead I just look at you.

"I love you and you cannot love me"

I said it, but only regret doing so.

Can it be the same?

Can i face you again?

I try to do so, but only feel the love,

along with the pain.

So many times has this been my story.

So many times again shall it be.

Please go away, there is a crack in the mask.

And I must fix it before it shatters.