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Have you ever wondered where you fit in? My thoughts race and I try to find out where I belong. I'm pulled in all directions by what I like or want to be. Seems there's too many paths to follow and it's hard to only pic one. Sometimes it's hard to understand where you came from, where you are now or where you're going. So many things I'd like to do. For some reason I sometimes fall into that trap of being what others want me to be. I'm headstrong, strong willed and will stand up for what I believe in, but, your mind doesn't always do what you wish it would. Every path seems to have a description or standard, I'd like to be a little of each, but fully me.

Last week my daughter and I put up our christmas tree. I was happy that she stayed the night. It's hard to get her to stay all night. Seems she comes up with every excuse she can think of to say no. I can never get a straight answer, and wonder what she's hearing on the other end? Christmas is really christmas when you have children.

I've been working on my vocals, going through a course by myself. It seems I'm doing ok for a while, and somehow forget the dynamics later, leaving me with that throaty squeak again.

Working on lyrics slowly. Write it as it comes, don't want to stress it and be fake or shallow.

Right now I'm smoking a Black and Mild cigar, eating a Snickers Bar, downloading legal or is it illegal music? hard to know anymore -and I'm drinking a non-alcoholic Busch Beer. Hard core man! Can't drink anymore, painful story, doc's orders. Blah, Blah.

It's the first day of December, Friday, 2006. There's about 8 inches of snow outside right now. A storm brought all that snow overnight. Actually I woke up about 5 a.m. and looked outside and there was barely anything, anywhere. I got up about 4 or 5 hours later, and I was practically snowed in. Walked out to the shed behind the house to get my shovel. Of course, the lock was froze. Walked back through 4 feet of snow for 5 miles, ok, maybe 150 feet and it was 10" Tried to get in my trunk, barely breaking my key, just to get this de-icing spray can and turn around and walk all the way through the driveway back to the shed. I survived with several growls.

I think I'm gonna put the tree up on Sunday and have shorty (my daughter) help me decorate it. She's anxious to learn how to ski, so that'll be coming up soon. Kids are fun if you understand them. You both kinda grow up together.