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Today i was reading the cbits. in the paper and came across a name i know well.. My fiance from 15 years ago..I think i was kinda in shock. I wasn't sure if i should've been crying or what. We were together 6 years. He was everyones friend...except mine. He started doing drugs our 3rd year together...Then the hitting started. He was the type that at the end of our relationship, he would say," If i can't have you, no one else can!". I don't hate him anymore. I've forgiven him now. Should i be crying? Maybe i will at a later date when i have enough alone time to think on it. I just kinda feel i should be more upset. Kinda feeling guilty that i'm not.

Should i be feeling this guilt?

Should i be crying?

Well, last saturday our daughter was crowned Prom Queen. We are quite proud of her. She's a great girl. Always on the honor roll. Cute, sweet, and smart. Now she's getting ready to graduate in a month. She's going off to college..Ohio State! Go Bucks!! lol They grow up sooo fast.. I miss that cute lil girl with the dimples dancing on the porch....

Today was a pretty good day. Found out our one son, Blake, is having a baby girl in August. We are really happy for him. I'm so excited! We do not have many girls in our family...lots of boys, though! Now i can start buying alot of stuff for her! I just love little babies! Ohhh...her name is already chosen! Her name is ..Savannah Michele. I love being a grandma!

Well.....i'm alone in my house finally!! lol

I have no idea what to do...Usually there is at least 3-4 people here at a time. I will explain...When i married, my husband had 5 kids with his first wife. Well, in 2001 his ex and my step-son Lance were killed in a car accident. We got the kids that were still living with her. We went from 2 to 4 in a day. She also had a son from a man after my husband. We got him also. We kept him for 6 weeks . We still get him often.

At this point we have only 3 at home,and 1 just turned 18. Woohoo!! 2 to go! lol I really love these kids...All have been a wonderful blessing.

So, back to the beginning.....i'm all alone.....what should i do with myself? Hmmmm.....I think i will take a nap! lol Sweet dreams here i come!!