I want u to know this that I am sorry if u are out there. I am sorry. Vampricdemon I want u to know that I am sorry about what I said so here goes. I had a talk with Chris and everything is all right.He said that he'll talk to mom about it. So it's okay. I am sorry that I got upset about u telling me to follow my heart. I still am going to.
Mom finally did she finally broke me. I hope she is happy what she acomplish. I wish that I could stop crying there is no since in crying. She has accomplish it. I now think she doesn't want me to have a boyfriend or anyone to talk to. I mind as well be a nun. I just feel like it over now and I must weep for the world. She think that she can broke my spirt but it's never going to work. Why doesn't she stay in my life? VampricDemon I did what u said I open my heart and then my mother torn it out me and there was nothing left. Don't I deceive love? I guess not.I know my life doesn't mean a dam thing to her. I was just born. God or whoever out there I can't stop crying it want stop. I just know I can never be happy. Chris, I am sorry. That is how I feel now if u read this tomorrow.
I am on a bridge and it start to rain. I run back and get into the car and the car start going and when got back on the bridge the river start rising and the car that was bridge get sweep down under. And I am so scared that I start to struggle in the car. I paniake. I then wake up. That is the strangest dream so far I ever had. I don't know what it is about but all I know I was scared of that water riseing and me being down it. I don't understand it at all. So if anyone ask me what that dream means I have no idea. I usually have some idea what it's about but not this time.
I can't wait to meet him. I am so excite he said that he got a friend to ride him up there. I am so happy and worryed at the sametime. I want him to like me but am also afraid that he want. I am not sure if I can make it. I am so bored.
I AM SO BORED AND DEPRESSION WILL SOMEBODY DO SOMETHING I AM SO BORED. AND I HAVE ANOTHER FUNNY DREAM. HE SAID THAT HE WOULD NEXT WEEKEND. IN THE DREAM HE IS HOLDING ME IN A TIGHT EMBRACE. I HOLD HIM. AT FIRST HE SEEMS TO BE COLD AND THEN WHEN I HOLD HIM WE ARE WARM. AND WHEN I AM WAKE IT FEEL LIKE HE IS SPEAKING TO ME IN MY MIND. I KNOW THAT SOUND STRANGE BUT THAT WHAT IT FEELS LIKE WHEN WE TALK ON THE PHONE. I DON'T KNOW WHAT IT IS? WITH ME AND HIM.
I am dancing with this boy in this dream. I am wearing a mask. I am so afraid that he would remove the mask that I am wearing. He hold me in his arms and he kissing me. I want him so badly to love me I am nervious. He looks at in the eyes. And he removes my mask. I cover my face to hide it from him and he start laughting at me. So I run away from him. That's is the strangest dream I had. I wonder what this dream means. Chris is the guy in my dream. I wonder if he will laught at me or maybe I should not show my face to him. But at the sametime my heart is telling me to take a leap of faith I wonder what I should do? Can anyone tell me on this site?
Trust is something I varred online u have giving me more reason to not trust you. So I think to myself will u guy ever let me in your little circle because I am new I want you all to at least trust me. I am so sick of you all treating me badly. You have hurt my feeling. I know you guys are supose to be monsters on here. But I thought I was helping u all by telling u that I have the vampire book and that I have read other books. I just thought you where like me another person. But instead I get prove wroug again. I am start to think my friend was right about this site. Don't talk to the member because all they can do is make u cry.
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