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Day 1, In the Ghost House: I saw a spooky ghost over by the piano, I said "Hey get out of here ghost." It just looked at me with its stupid ghost face and ghost eyes.

Day 2, In the Ghost House: I saw a spooky ghost with a sexy ghost butt. Why are ghost butts so sexy?

Day 3, In the Ghost House: Fucking ghost horses everywhere, with weird ghost horse faces, and sexy ghost horse butts. Stop it, Stop making me look.

Day 4, In the Ghost House: I've joined the ghosts, what if I was a ghost all along, my butt is so sexy.. and my face..Is so stupid..

Oh shittttt.

I've already lived a million years it seems..I'm so tired of this world already and i've hardly even been in or seen it...



I find myself often outside on a roof or on the earth starting into the stars..and where there should be thought of simple needs, wants or issues...there is not a single thing..just silence..

As of now I write.. my stomach is full and my thirt is quenched but I desire more.... More that lies within blood.. and I have never had a donor.. my thirst right now that tears me apart for the warmth metallic of whatever holds what I need to feel alive is KILLING ME... it makes me angry...grumpy.. no wonder people don't like me.

I remember everything from age 4-18 very vividly..same with my life.. it seems to go by so slowly that I remember everything and every detail.. I remember moving to my first big house and throwing a baseball to my dad and him tossing it back.. playing in the tall grass back yard with my old dog sunflower girl..who was much bigger than I now see welsh corgies are.. I remember my bubble gum medicine.. and how I was bullied.. catching butterflies and I remember my mom taking me finishing saying "Sing the the fish!!"



All of that has changed now..my father never talks to me.. I live with my cousin and aunt in a not so good part of town.. my corgie is dead..and there's another little girl in my back yard..

"God you know, everything in my life just moves so slow, I have all the same friends that I had from five and six years ago, and it's like everything that has happened all those years ago happened just yesterday I remember them so well...."

"When I look in the mirror i'm just disgusted because I look nothing like the age my brain or my "soul" is if I have one. It's hard being a Satanic 18 year old that actually knows what they're doing in life. Oh man."

"When it's night time I feel so different, like i'm more lifted somehow.. The moons glow and the cloak of the shadows and darkness just make me feel so mysterious and magical...and a bit hungry for something that isn't food. Like nutrients, life."

"I feel so tired all the time..I've tried everything and the results have been inconclusive...It's like i'm a different breed that needs a life force."