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Slain's Journal


Slain's Journal

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23 entries this month
 

Como el Sol y el Trigo.

14:54 Sep 28 2012
Times Read: 1,227


• • • • ENTRY IS ENCRYPTED • • • •

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Self...

10:22 Sep 27 2012
Times Read: 1,262


I do not understand...



I am unkind...



I do not listen...



I am unforgiving...



I only think of me and my feelings in any situation...



I consider no one but myself...



I am impatient...



I am closed-minded....



I only focus on what I feel...



I am somehow, purposefully hurtful...



I do not claim to be anything other than an asshole...



... just.. who the hell am I?


COMMENTS

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ViktorianaBlue
ViktorianaBlue
20:31 Sep 27 2012

To answer that, you need to write the same with all your positives :)





Slain
Slain
16:42 Sep 28 2012

What if the only positive is that I KNOW all these things about me are true?





ElleEternal
ElleEternal
18:49 Sep 28 2012

Then you're doing it wrong and not looking hard enough for positives.





queenofchaos
queenofchaos
17:16 Sep 29 2012

I agree.



You're not looking deep enough.



Your positives FAR exceed these.



*shake your head*



Stop "thinking" to hard...





 

This is how I get woken up?

16:57 Sep 26 2012
Times Read: 1,287


her-OMG Slain WAKE UP!!!



me-O.O!!! what!?!!? what is it? ::groggy as fuck and eyes still closed::



Her- Is Your computer on?



me-Um.. yeah see the screen? It's always on you kn-- What the FUCK!?! What Happened!?



her- The comps off?



me- Fucking YES!! Why?!?



her- the Guys are messing with the fuse box... I told them to wait till I told your sister and you to turn off all the compu---



me- guess the fuck what?!?! They Morons DIDN'T!!! Thanks for telling me about the fucking bomb WHILE the bomb is being SET.



her- but your bedroom light is still on, that can't mean they hit it. Let me go make sure.



me- I don't care!! I KNOW they hit the fucking switch. What the FUCK are you having idiots doing ANYTHING in this house for? This is NOT the first fucking time.



her-(into the kitchen) Hey did you hit anything? I asked you to wait till warned them to shut everything down.



Them- yeah we hit the switch



~~~~-_-... You FUCKING THINK!?!?!?~~~~~



her- yeah they hit the ---



Me- NO SHIT!!!!!! I just LOVE how you get morons to do shit around the house to later bitch something was done wrong.



sibling- ::walking down the steps and realizing it's NOT a blackout:: What the FUCK is happening!?!? The mother fucking fusebox having selective Blackouts!?



me- Exactly! Idiocy has been released upon us again. (into the kitchen) Thank You for the WARNING ASSHOLES because YOU are totally going to replace whatever gets FUCKED by your stupidity.



her- Oh my g--



Me- YES "Oh My GOD" Stop STUPID at the fucking DOOR! Don't invite it the FUCK in!!!







It is fairly safe to say... I am SICK of the same idiots half-assing shit around the house. You don't know what you are doing. Shut the fuck up and step the fuck off. Shit has been ruined by you enough.



Fuck. You.



COMMENTS

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Slain
Slain
17:26 Sep 26 2012

Being able to make this post is evident to the fact that certain Moronic individuals are still alive.



Fuck...





ladySnowStrixx
ladySnowStrixx
15:49 Sep 27 2012

POOR SLAINY POO ! go beated them then go back to sleep.HUGS!





 

Conversations... Aren't ideas lovely?

00:17 Sep 26 2012
Times Read: 1,310




Him: well it occurs to me secrets are never treate equitably ...theres no safely kept



Slain: hmm



Him: hmm??



Slain: equitably?



Him: yeah see if we are secrets theres no reason to be equitable towards us no outward shows of affection no need to spend time no usual relation stuff we are just there when and if they want us ...our feelings are nothing more than a leash.







Hmm...

COMMENTS

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EmpressOfPassion
EmpressOfPassion
04:22 Sep 26 2012

*falls over laughing*





 

Silver Linings Anonymous... Membership Declined.

15:40 Sep 24 2012
Times Read: 1,347


Not Verbatim.



But believe what you wish...



~~~~~~



Clerk-"Please have a seat. This is a preliminary hearing for reinstatement of Child Support order filed in May 201.

Ok, Sir, what is your current situation?"



Slain-"I recently lost my job, more than a month ago."



Clerk-"And how are you currently supporting yourself?"



Slain-"I live at home. My mother is helping me."



Clerk-"Alright. Ma'am, as you are aware of his current situation, do you wish to continue further with the petition for Child Support?"



Ex-"He does this every couple of years! He finds a job keeps it for 2 to 6 months and then leaves it! This is unacceptable!"




(this is the part where the clerk more or less assumes that's a YES.)



Clerk-"Alright... This is only the preliminary hearing. You will get another date for a Court hearing in front of a Judge where you will actually get sworn in. There your cases will be

pleaded and examined, for further action. Please sign here and I will get your Summons printed for the both of you..."




~~~~~



It's a good thing that what my ex said is true, or I really would feel there isn't much of a silver lining to the fact that I survived the accident that cost me my job. Oh wait....


COMMENTS

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Slain
Slain
16:03 Sep 24 2012

Yeah... I survived.





Why?





ElleEternal
ElleEternal
16:48 Sep 24 2012

The silver lining is that you ARE alive and around for your daughter's sake, regardless of how limited that may be right now. The court bullshit is all about money, but once your girl is older and able to make her own decisions, the money won't be what's important.





veauclin
veauclin
20:02 Sep 24 2012

you survived because you still have a purpose. something you have to do in your lifetime. like to be there for your daughter.





 

Why did things gets so hard so fast?

03:20 Sep 23 2012
Times Read: 1,366


Why can't we take a step back, breathe...

and just smile?

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veauclin
veauclin
10:58 Sep 25 2012

you know what happens hard too fast:P. dont make a mess of your pants sir chuckles





 

Absolute Win.

01:22 Sep 19 2012
Times Read: 1,391











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Hey Dood?

18:25 Sep 18 2012
Times Read: 1,396


Hey Ty, From one former ****** to another,



how "Safely Kept" are you feeling lately?



Heh...


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Tyberius
Tyberius
06:14 Sep 23 2012

lmao im good





 

Slain remembers... Eggshells?

21:20 Sep 17 2012
Times Read: 1,407


Once upon a time...



I'm not in the mood and you obviously are.



I'll sit back and let you try to convince me otherwise, with absolutely no interest shown in your efforts.



Still in the mood? Hell, do you even have the energy to muster a smile?




Yeah...




There's a major hiccup between just going "Hey, Not now, alright?"



And making one sorry they ever tried.






Oh... and to all the guys out there? It's okay to say 'no' every once in a while. Even more so to make it more frequent. Just a thought.



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Cause I'm Pretty!!!

01:10 Sep 17 2012
Times Read: 1,438


Oh well... I guess someone cares.





Alrighty... So... Hi, Yeah. Yup. It's me again. yeah I may seem like I'm about let off some over zealous, too-much-time-on-my-hands, deep thinker, obnoxously verbose type of rant. But honestly? I'm tired.



I't would seem people have been getting confused and/or too engorged on rumors or one sort or another.



Let me be clear.







Slain Is Single








And thus has now, and has had for over a week, free range of acting every and any which way he pleases when it comes to women. Including but not limited to, Being a Man Whore.



SO... All you pretty ladies!! Don't be afraid to chat me up. I only bite when told to!! ;})



Real Vampires love Vampire Rave

COMMENTS

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XTalonDarkbladeX
XTalonDarkbladeX
02:15 Sep 17 2012

First comment yay fucking me :



Im so proud of my sidekick yay man whores unite ...who am I kidding only on VR do we get any sorta sex and sadly we never know it till someone tells us!!!!





queenofchaos
queenofchaos
02:22 Sep 17 2012

"Single and ready to Mingle" =]





veauclin
veauclin
22:58 Sep 20 2012

im coming to get you . you sexy bastard :))) winks





 

Thoughts and Feelings...

20:12 Sep 16 2012
Times Read: 1,459


Apparently... I am unapproachable.



Hmm...


COMMENTS

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veauclin
veauclin
20:14 Sep 16 2012

its true i wanted to tell you but but but i was scared to approach you :P





ViktorianaBlue
ViktorianaBlue
21:06 Sep 16 2012

Really?? You should have told me when I approached you.





queenofchaos
queenofchaos
09:35 Nov 20 2012

OH whoever said you weren't approachable, is clearly fucked in the head.



You're the biggest softest snuggle bunny.



You great everyone with a smile!





 

Life...

23:15 Sep 09 2012
Times Read: 1,477


And now time continues to pass.



Tomorrow is Kyrah's first day of school.



The grand question:











Why can't I be there?


COMMENTS

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queenofchaos
queenofchaos
14:02 Sep 11 2012

You can, and should be.






 

Must be the Season...

21:31 Sep 07 2012
Times Read: 1,501


De extranar el que dana el corazon.


COMMENTS

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XXOBSIDIANBUDERFLYXX
XXOBSIDIANBUDERFLYXX
23:30 Sep 07 2012

El corazón no conoce ningunos límites





 

Woops, I forgot the Lyrics...

17:39 Sep 07 2012
Times Read: 1,504






"Snuff"



Bury all your secrets in my skin

Come away with innocence, and leave me with my sins

The air around me still feels like a cage

And love is just a camouflage for what resembles rage again...



So if you love me, let me go.

And run away before I know.

My heart is just too dark to care.

I can't destroy what isn't there.

Deliver me into my fate -

If I'm alone I cannot hate

I don't deserve to have you...

My smile was taken long ago

If I can change I hope I never know



I still press your letters to my lips

And cherish them in parts of me that savor every kiss

I couldn't face a life without your light

But all of that was ripped apart...

when you refused to fight



So save your breath, I will not hear.

I think I made it very clear.

You couldn't hate enough to love.

Is that supposed to be enough?

I only wish you weren't my friend.

Then I could hurt you in the end.

I never claimed to be a saint...

My own was banished long ago

It took the death of hope to let you go



So break yourself against my stones

And spit your pity in my soul

You never needed any help

You sold me out to save yourself

And I won't listen to your shame

You ran away - you're all the same

Angels lie to keep control...

My love was punished long ago

If you still care, don't ever let me know

If you still care, don't ever let me know...






COMMENTS

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veauclin
veauclin
23:30 Sep 07 2012

love it bro thanks for putting me on to this song





angelkiller
angelkiller
00:42 Sep 17 2012

one of my favorite songs by them...





 

Snuff

21:08 Sep 06 2012
Times Read: 1,517


For a few friends of mine. Old and Recent.... Cheers guys and gals. And remember...



"...prick love for pricking and you beat love Down!"











COMMENTS

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NewMizery24
NewMizery24
00:11 Sep 07 2012

Song had an extreme impact on my life at one point.





Slain
Slain
03:29 Sep 07 2012

As it did myself. And I felt I should share it with those it could be linked to.



Too many strong message withing it to forsake.





veauclin
veauclin
22:15 Sep 07 2012

you know my feeelings about this song bro .





angelkiller
angelkiller
00:46 Sep 17 2012

remember when i listened to this song a lot in the past because of a couple of my exs. -smiles- you helped me out of a bad time slain ^^





 

Vr Journals

14:43 Sep 05 2012
Times Read: 1,534


I'm currently surprised at seeing myself searching for insight...



In one of the most strange, malevolent and greed infested places.



The take?



That I may, in fact, have found some.



Cheers.


COMMENTS

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Truth? Maybe...

14:25 Sep 05 2012
Times Read: 1,536


Only one is a True statement.





1- I am a horrible Liar.



2- I believe the First, well placed Lie, is the worst.



3- I believe a lie is only as good as its necessity.



hmm hmm...




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OH really?'

23:17 Sep 04 2012
Times Read: 1,553


Well... Te tengo que decir algo.



yo y a few ghosts vamos a terner unas pocas cosas in common.



Te veo!!!!!


COMMENTS

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Slain
Slain
23:24 Sep 04 2012

Oh and since I said I would say it...



FUCK OFF!!!



:: winks::





 

Really?

03:07 Sep 03 2012
Times Read: 1,563


Some Shit days just outshit others.



Today just outshit quite a few of em.


COMMENTS

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Me... II

04:25 Sep 02 2012
Times Read: 1,577


Truth...



I don't like lying. I fucking hate it. I approach ever single being with full intentions of disclosing any and everything about myself.



I've not a thing to hide. Nothing.



You can doubt me all you want. But It makes my life easy.



Why? because there's plenty of other shit in my life that consume time and warping words into intricate designs just for the sake of maintaining a ruse is a luxury i find NO COMFORT IN.



Why do I open up to people? Simple.



Because I can lie to you.



Because I can lie... and you WILL believe me.

And the sad part is, you never know the truth anyway. Open your eyes... every last bit of info you think you know about me, could be false.



And if you don't think that is possible. You are a fool.



I see all people that way. Just as Respect is earned, so is trust. And I trust no one. Does that hurt your feelings? Then you don't know me at all.



Anyway... back to lies.



I tell the truth... because I treat others and behave as I would like to be dealt with in kind. Not a hard concept, you backward asshats.



Could I be lying? Yes, Am I lying? That's up to you. Are you lying to me? Of you course you are, Sorry. But... the question is... Do I know that you are lying? And why am I still dealing with you, if you are?



Lies, are a bitch.



And the Truth just hurts.



Pain dissipates... but your world have to mold itself around your lies. How pathetically exhausting.



I've got better things to waste my mental energies on.



Oh... and if I find You are worth lying to, :: snorts::

Congrats you reached some place few ever do.



Food for thought.


COMMENTS

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queenofchaos
queenofchaos
05:35 Sep 02 2012

Wow...I knew it!



You're a 12 year old girl.





Slain
Slain
05:37 Sep 02 2012

Teen angst. Finally getting some air!



Go figure, eh?



How old am I really? Pffft



Not old enough to mind.





 

Fragments.

22:40 Sep 01 2012
Times Read: 1,580


Everyone you know is a fragment of you.



That little triteness: "You are what you surround yourself with."



Every person that you associate with Feeds off of you, as you feed off of them.



Doesn't matter how. It just happens. I dare say feeding each one's respective ego. But that is not entirely the case.



if every one you spoke to gave an account of you, You'd be a different person is that singular persons account of you was the only truth.



You are many parts and you are who you need to be to certain people.



You are who you are. But don't forget complexity accompanies.



Not one person understand anyone completely. It is impossible. Because you cannot be inside a person's mind constantly, if at all.



People change? Hmm hmm... Or maybe they never really showed you who they really were.


COMMENTS

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Me

19:59 Sep 01 2012
Times Read: 1,585


Me.



It is absolutely true that I enjoy writing. But why?



All I know is that I find it fairly easy to portray my inner most feelings easily this way.



To vent? Perhaps. But I want others to "learn" from what I feel. I want those to taste the pain that I've felt. Not because the should, not because I'm lonely. But because some lessons... are harsh and unforgiving.



I want you to get a sense of what I've lived and gain some insight of your own. I don't want you to adopt my way of thinking. Nor do I want you to agree with me. I want you to think.



Argue with me, debate, contradict and challenge me.



"I love to think.

As should you.

Because what lesson is learned

when it's spoon fed to you.?"



Rarely do you not find that my hear has felt every line that I've written.



Nor that I've put aside that my readers are going to feel or not feel connected to my stories.



I write for that one person who gains from reading my work.



The way that I've gained from reading other things.



They read it, because they needed it. And what I feel is not the most unique thing in the world. Everyone Loves, everyone hates. Everyone Hurts



This is me and read what you wish.

Just don't think you know me

without knowing which heart is which.


COMMENTS

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Hurt enough...

19:43 Sep 01 2012
Times Read: 1,587


Just a message I've been wanting to get out.

Hmm hmm.



Enjoy





If you find yourself searching, that means that you feel you lack what you search for. No plainer truth exists.



And in eyes that watch the oncoming tide

of waves of lust and pleasures to ride.

And seeking that love that binds us to their side.

Is the deepest of treasures any heart can thus hide.



You seek them. You want them; And let yourself be all but known.

Your brazen foolishness is that to all but your own.

The heart like anything becomes tired and starts to grow walls.

It loves and feels regardless, but in Passion it stalls.



You hound, and follow and practically suffocate

and sometimes patience whittles so that real becomes hate.

The unbridled and thoughtless wanting that some rarely see

could become a festering force and soon poison it could be.



Love slowly... love tender and love wholy and entirely.

just love and worry not so much about what would in obscurity.

Guess not what comes, for you'll lose yourself in time

Time you could be spending, with that Treasure of thyne.



Let your wounds guide you, for they are there for that.purpose.

But never hide behind them or your heart will lose its focus.

For nothing is worth gaining your heart does not suffer for.

For life doesn't give; It presents,

and awaits for you...



to want more.




COMMENTS

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