The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

I've been told that my last journal entry might go right over the heads of my target audience - the 13-year old "kiddy lesbians", so here is the condensed version. This is specifically for the tiny terror badass thumb-sucking "kiddy lesbians".



A TEST



Have you reached puberty?



1. Stand in front of a mirror.



2. Undress



3. Look at your body.



4. Do not touch, only look.



5. Do you have PIMPLES, PUBIC HAIR, & BOOBS

(you must have two of the above)



6. One pubic hair and training bra size boobs doesn't count (unless you're over 21).



7. If the answer is no, wait six months and repeat steps 1 - 6.



8. If the answer is yes - Oh nevermind - I don't think that is possible, as most of you sound like 2-year olds.



One more thing - quit threatening everyone. At some point, someone is going to die of a brain stigmata (reference Foamy's eye stigmata) laughing at your ridiculous posts.

I'm not specifically ranting on the tiny terrors although in most instances they are one and the same. It's getting very old reading profiles which state, "I'm bi and if you don't like it, I'll hurt you". Yeah, whatever - I'm so scared I just wet myself! Now I know this subject has been dealt with by my fellow ranters, but for my own sanity, I have to also contribute.



I have one important question. Have any of you idiots even reached puberty? I know this may be a difficult question for some of you to answer, so I will give you some hints. Now please pay attention - and get your faces and minds out of wherever you may be imagining them to be. PIMPLES, PUBIC HAIR, BOOBS! Now, if you haven't experienced at least two of the above three symptoms, WTF are you doing?



Even the mentally retarded realize they have to reach puberty before exploring sexuality. And they have far more sense than you 13-year old "lesbians."



I personally don't care what part of your anatomy you are sticking where, or what rubber toys you may be playing with, and I'm fairly sure that others also don't care. So take your juvenile attention-seeking behaviors back to the kiddy playground.



Oh, and one more thing. Based on the number of child lesbians on this site, you may actually be contributing to a zero population growth. At least some of you may have come to realize that lesbians can't reproduce. Duh! At the very least, you also may be responsible for a reduction in unwanted children, which typically occurs when children have children. So grow up! Sex isn't for children.

I really don't know where to start. I'm beginning to think that the majority of the teenagers on this site are the result of a mass inbreeding experiment conducted in Alabama or Tennessee. I'm sure you know who you are. And, if you are from Alabama or Tennessee, and your family tree isn't a staight line - sorry. The only other explanation for the various grammatical mistakes is massive brain damage - probably at birth. For that, I am very sorry as birth defects are no laughing matter. However, if you can sit in a chair and type, then you can use a fucking dictionary!