Heavy20:48 Jan 25 2008
Times Read: 667
It's been a hell of a day. I'm home 3 days with a sick child. Work, of course, hasn't bothered to take care of itself. I'm swamped and don't care right now. I'll be here Sunday playing catch up and trying like hell not to have the boss breathin down my throat on Monday.
I'm being enlightened by some very interesting viewing material. I'm not easily swayed, but I am easily provoked. Does that make sense? Heh, probably not. Hell, it's probably not even what I mean. Do I know what I mean, really? Do we know...anything?
I don't get into big debates, I don't get into scuffles, I believe what I believe and I respect the fact that not everyone believes with me. That's ok. I like hearing about other peoples' views and opinions. I don't get angry about a healthy discussion, as long as it doesn't turn into a 'your way sucks, mine is better' kind of thing.
I'm babbling, I know. Too many things are running around in my mind right now and with every phone call, every pop up, I'm distracted and come back to a new thought. Who cares, right? it's my journal, it's just a place to throw my thoughts.
I think I actually experienced some heartache today. No one died, no one left me (though with some, it wouldn't cause heartache anyway), I just found some things really interesting. Things that made me think too much about life in general.
I don't like the way that feels, but I have to keep going. I can't stop looking at this stuff, even though it hurts. I have to know. I have to feel like I understand. I have to feel like everything I've been raised with...still holds in me. This stuff will always niggle at me, I think. I just need to know that I can still believe and have faith...after checking the whole thing out.
I don't know..it doesn't make sense to me either. How can I expect it to make sense to anyone else.
I think I'll just keep babbling. Who knows, maybe I'll babble my way right through it.
COMMENTS
-
xxEmaeraldxx
23:20 Feb 05 2008
hahaa... eat it babe, eat it!!