well, you have made valentine's day this year quite memorable for me. thanks sooooo much
This morning, I was on here and the phone rang. Stupid me answered it, only to hear Alexi's mom telling me that he shot himself last night.
I will start this properly. Alexi and I went to school in Bremmerhaven because his father was working in the area for a time. I was 6 and he was 7, both in the first grade. Very quickly, we became the best of friends. Through the years, no matter where one or the other of us was; if the need or desire arose one of us would go to where the other was. For whatever reason. I was there when his father died, and he was there when my first bf and I broke up. This past Thanksgiving, his wife, Natasha, and son, Mikhail, were both killed in a traffic accident. I wanted to go right then, to be with him, to help him through this. But he asked that I give him a bit of time to deal with things on his own. So I did. I was going to go this August, for his birthday.
Well, now he won't be having one. And I can't help being pissed at him. I can't help but cry. My god, i have lost probably the most important person in my life. So what am I supposed to do now? I have never lived where i can't just pick up the phone and call him. where i can't just get on the comp and there he is. he emailed me last night, he told me not to mourn him, and that he loved me.....that he would always be with me.
I want to resurrect him so I can shoot him now. How dare he leave me and his mother alone to deal with not only the pains of losing Tasha and Mikhail, but him too. What the fuck was he thinking????????/
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