The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

Wrapped and draped in glittering gown

women glide - frail in frame, yet majestic in stride.

Remains of men weather time well

giving life to dark garments, as if by a spell.



Each gesture, a husk from former self

Each body present, a lively core



In proper form, partners waltz through motion,

facing each other, facing eternity.

Masks held by hand hide black, sunken pits,

Which grant no window to soul - only abyss



Everyone present has finished life's maze,

have been rewarded, but offer no thanks.

Eternal they grin, eternal they gaze,

maneuvering through Death's own masquerade.

There was a time I wished to see it washed from my soul

But that time has passed as if it were never here at all



It courses through my veins as thick as blood

As thick as thieves

What has it made me?



It boils my skin

Seeps through the surface

It affects my smile.



It's effects are cruel -

affects my attentions and intention.

It destroys my affection and makes it hard to be.



Day after day - it gets worse by night.

I feel an itch I can't scratch.



A screech and a crack.

A snap or a pop.

A growl.



I can't see through my eyes anymore.

My vision's distorted.

I can't well think - my thoughts are contorted.



I stumble as sights blackens.

But I still move.



I'm tired.

Falling asleep, but my body still moves.



I can feel movement.

I experience thoughts.

But not mine.



It's strange, but not my concern.

I'm tired.

Sleep finds me.



Will I find myself again?

It's not my concern.



There's no more itch.

None that I can tell.



Am I the itch?

I don't care.

I'm tired.



Sleep...

My soul experiences its darkest night

I cry, shake, laugh and thrash

losing sanity and my innocent smile

trading love and care for bitter rancor

resentment that will never die



if only i knew a priorI



how love awry make one damned

if only I knew a priori

my views might not have changed on that bitter night's verge

and found myself, months later, warped



devils have a pleasant aroma

and offer pleasure in exchange for a person

- an offer I accepted with open hand



to have inhibitions plucked like a pear

and all desires surface without ado

as if never suppressed. My blood rises

- never again will I be held prisoner to care



I can only see from my own "eye"

since I freely walked out of Eden



never to look back or laugh

never to hold another close to me

to spit at love in a matter most primal

and grasp whatever I want - at the cost of a soul

.

A small boy walks, holding hands with his father,

he looks up and smiles at his beautiful mother.

Little does he know what awaits, not ten years down the road



His limbs stretch, he forms himself well.

He grows strong, and kind - warm an tall.

He sees the world as a gracious place,

where good things happen to those who deserve.



In darker corners, the shadows stir,

Anxiously waiting for his world to shatter.

They stir for the return of their king.



The shadow crown - wispy and grey,

sits upon a throne and patiently waits.

For a heartbreak.



After years of comfort, and confidence grown

in the people around him, the fair prince returns to his home.



His love for one is betrayed,

his head finds his hands.

She left for another, repulsed by this man.



He turns to his parents for a kind word,

but after all that's been said and all that's been heard...

he's driven mad, and his world turns to black.



He wakes to find himself in a grey world of wonder.



The shadows surround him,

offering their grins and glares

that are so much more sincere

than anything the living could procure.



They walk with him, not saying a word.

In silence they continue for a still moment in time.



He finds himself at the foot of a throne and takes each step, each as his own.



He fingers the crown with wispy touch,

and delicately accepts, lifts it up

and crowns himself as King of Fools.



His eyes study a kingdom

filled with hope dashed by despair

and he is satisfied.



All around him,

those crushed in like kind rise

and adopt for themselves,

the children of this realm -

a glare

a smile,

and leave all else in the land of illusion.

There are lots of things I can accept, I know

My Truth. My Pain. And Vertigo.

But never will I accept truths you'd tell me

when you would wrap your arms 'round me,

resting your head upon my chest.



On and on, You pander of eternal love

Hoping to resonate with me.

Blind to all truths except your own - fine by me.

Nothing you ever did or said

lingered a heartbeat after death.



The reality of this dream prohibits

the truth of this instance.

It clouds my way with smoke and mirrors. And you?

Enveloped in what's familiar.

Cradling you in dark slumbers.



I'm hurt and stranded, so far away from home,

no family to keep me sane.

None that I recognize. The days are endless.

Nights grant blackness, but no repose.

I twist and cry and lose myself.



Why did you bother to tell me

such a blatant lie?

Why didn't you bother to provide

a single reason why?

How could you believe yourself

when you can't even see (yourself)

through a pair of naked eyes?



My eyes run dry - two withered, lifeless sockets,

There's nothing left for me to see.

For nothing in this world

There's nothing worldly that could save me from truth.

There is what is. There's nothing more.

There never was a "me and you".



There is no truth to save me from painful lies.

There is what is, and nothing more.

There exists no lie capable of blunting truth's edge.

This is truth - I've heard them all.

I find what is oft cannot fade.



Why did you bother to tell me

such a blatant lie?

Why didn't you bother to provide

a single reason why?

How could you believe yourself

when you can't even see (yourself)

through a pair of naked eyes?



I've been stripped of truth and lies

everything that held me in my place

and everything that gave me faith



in you.