The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

The all Great, Shinedown!!!!!
09:03 Nov 29 2005
Times Read: 527




"Stranger Inside"



This day could be the worst one yet

I just won't relax I can't catch my breath

Because I'm sick and tired of you'll be fine

Well how do you know, can you read minds





So take it while you can so you can meet demands

My insanity is what you thrive on

So rip it from my soul, so everyone will know in the end

We were never friends





Have you ever felt lost inside so unloved within that you almost died

Have you ever stepped out of the light and realized there's a stranger inside



Don't push your ignorance on me

I'm not unrehearsed to your jealousy

And I know you think I don't see the signs

Well how do you know, do I look blind





So take it while you can so you can meet demands

My breakdown is what you thrive on

So rip it from my soul so everyone will know in the end

I'm the break you're the bend

I am Drunk
08:02 Nov 27 2005
Times Read: 533

Today is now my birthday and this will take me a long time to type cause everything is blurry! But its now !:56 am my time and i have been taking shots of kesler since 12, so tipsy I am, lol. I am sitting here listening to breaking benjamin/so cold. I am in the beginning stages of my birthday so nothing is really depresing, YET, that is why I write this now, Well good day and cheerios HAHAHAHAHA!

It's Just Another Day in Hell for Me...
04:11 Nov 27 2005
Times Read: 535

Yeah if you have read my profile my birthday is tomorrow and I finally turn 21, the legal age to buy booze (although I can do that now). Usually I get drunk off of my ass while making my own cake, then go into my room and play vidoe games till I realise how alone I am then start to cry from shear ignorance and stupity. I love someone yet we cant be with each other because she is underage, and her mom shipped her off to her grandparents till she is 18 so we can't be "together" and its tearing both of us up inside. We have dated before in the past in person and we got caught then she went away and we didnt talk for a while so I figured we were over, but come to find out from recent discoveries she still loves me and want sot be with me and doesnt think we should split up because of this and is willing ot wait. I dont know what to do. Decisionsare to overwhelming. I love her dearly always have and will. Put who knows what time can do to people, I sure the hell do. Well I probably wont be on tomorrow considering I will be drunk off my ass and drunks and keyboards dont get along. I might leave in a body bag but never in cuffs.

Love is only a pain waiting to be surfaced!
22:09 Nov 25 2005
Times Read: 538

Do we always have to go through these things in our lives? Is it only people like us, the out casts of society, never finding a place to truly belong, hoping and wishing for people to love you for whats on the inside not what you are or what you can be. If thats the cause theres a billion other people in this world I am sure you wikll find what you are looking for somewhere else, in someone elses arms, in someone elses eyes. Why do people put us through this pain, stabbing at our hearts swifttly nd fast, trying to take away all the pain. But it never goes away it just subsides in the depths below waiting to be exposed at your weakest moments for another to attack. Your gaurd not up, not waiting for the pounce, what are we to do? For some its just to live with the pain cause there is nothing we can do about it, but for some we can, and we should,. But why you ask? I ask myself the same thing daily, why bother, why work hard for something that will not be recognized, why try to accomplish the impossible. We try so hard to shut our selves out from every one, and it works so well, but then we find someone who you think is worth the time to open up too, well its not, word of advice, dont even bother! Stay in your space of darkness, it's where you will be most happy. Pain is your pleasure, use it. With this said, dont let people hurt you, also dont hurt others that are close to you now. Live your life everyday is your last, sit and wait for hte world to end. We all need something to cherish in our lives, for some its a love of another, for some its our pain, whatever it is cherish it deeply. Well I leave you now.



xXxRazorxXxBladexXxKissesxXx

The Downfall has Arrived!
04:36 Nov 25 2005
Times Read: 540

Well I was right, for every uprising in my life there is a downfall that follows it. Well I am no longer in a relationship, but the reasons are understandable. So thats ok. Its Thanksgiving and we all know how I just love holidays (that was sarcastic by the way) Happy FUCKING Thanksgiving, lets see what can we be thankful for! Booze, oh yeah booze is good, um I am thankful for my family who jumps down my throat for everything I do, whether it makes me happy or not, um did I say booze already, lol. Um, the fact that the two people I would rather spend my holiday with I cant, ones dead the other far away. Geez, my life is shit. Well more tomorrow. TTFN

What's New?
06:29 Nov 22 2005
Times Read: 544

Alot actually, some good, some bad. But hey we all have our downfalls and rises. This tends to be my rise, but the kind of person I am and the life that I have, I am just waiting for te downfall. I am in a new relationship. I wasnt quite ready if I wanted a relationship at the moment, but after being around this person for a bit, I changed my mind. She is a great and wonderful person. She has inspired my artwork again. Before I met her I stopped drawing and artistic work cause it served no purpose, but now I see it does, even though it is dark, art can brighten a persons day one line at a time. It just feels reall weird cause I am so used to drawing myself away from people because of being hurt int he past so much, by friends and significant others. But she is slowly showing me that it is ok to open up sometimes. I usually just hang out with family and their really close friends, but maybe that will all change! I m still waiting to get paid to I can go see my family in louisiana, wel some of them anyways, I dont quite get along with all of them. And my ex-girlfriend is pregnant with my kid and she wants me to be there for the birth. I really want to be there too, cuse I dont want my child growing up like I did, not knowing my father. But we dont get along very much and im sure there will be an arguement or two. Well not much else to write. So I will go, and if you are reading this, yes you know who you are, I love you. MUAH!