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Hey, just layin around, thinking about school and thinking that my life is total bull shit. I think that the way ppl portray life is bull shit. It could be so much better, instead ppl keep thier lazy asses on the couch yellin 2 their kids 2 get them another beer. Its rediculous, and then i c how ppl used to live in old country. THey had arranged marriges when they turned 18, and still everyone pretty much turned out the way that should have. I dont fully understand life and why it must go wrong.

I can only watch ppl be who they aren't. Dont let ppl judge u because they dont like u, as long as u aprove urself, then all should be well! Or that is how i feel on the subject anyhow.

Today has been an entirely awkward day.

But i suppose it has been good.



My thoughts have been racing, and my heart beating even faster, windows only just built are opening. It feels like i have a normal teenage life now, almost, even though only a single day has gone by since i have felt complete and normal.

But this trimester has brought new ppl in my life as well, and i finally am not afraid to speak my mind no matter what may come out of it. I feel finally like a normal teenager who can just have fun, and enjoy life as it was ment to be enjoyed.

I just saw Sweeney Todd! Holy Shit!

I know its a musical and all but wow.

I think i am obsesed the music. They

actually have ppl who can sing.

Unbelievable! Yup!

And every time johnny depp cut someones throat open, the blood would go in a different direction.

And the anger in his eyes, and the regret. You can't find that just any where. Thats a huge step from Cpt. Sparrow.

My lifeless body huvers over yours as my lips linger upon your so red and lusous for the longest time.

Our love which has seemed to last so long is about to seperate us both into different worlds by death, and now it must end. Once i let go, it will be over. I do not know if i can release you to the heavens just yet. I want to look upon your face before i eneter the black gates below.

I now let go, and our chests no longer cling, and i see the smile i hoped for as you wave a final goodbye. .