"Men want feminine women who will cook and clean and have sex whenever." This bullshit about what men want women to be is fucked. Why do we have to be pressured to conform to what men want us to be? Why do we have to feel like we have to be this and that to make men happy? Men want curvy. Men want skinny. Men want bones. Men want dependent. Men want feminine. Men want sexy. Men want sex. Who gives a goddamned hell what men want? Why do I have to conform to being something I'm not to make some man happy? Why do I have to become someone I am not happy with to get a man? Why do people tell women this is why we are single, because we aren't what men want?
I'm sorry, but I will NEVER be something or someone I am not to make someone happy. You want me to be feminine. You want the interior to match the exterior. You want a woman who is and acts like a woman. Fuck. You. With AN ICE PICK! I don't give a goddamned fuck what you want. We need to stop telling everyone what we want women to be. We need to stop telling women what we should be. We are imperfect. We are wonderful. We are strong. We are beautiful. There's nothing, nothing, wrong with that. If what men want is for women to be women, then why can't we be women? Why can't we be us? We are what we are. And women, stop it! Stop this bullshit. Stop this "Men want us to be _____!" We are not empty-headed, frivolous blocks of clay that can be molded into whatever you please. We are us. Personally, I love me. If any man thinks I'm too hard to handle, then that's their own fault. I am independent. I am strong. I am fast. I am picky. I am tough. I am quite possibly the hardest person there is to love. I'm not easy to date. Ask my exes: I'm quite possibly the hardest to love. Hardest to date. I am me, and that's all I want to be. I will not be afraid to be me, and I will not be pressured to change who I am simply because I am not the perfectly feminine girl who despises dirt, mud, fucking, cursing, and I don't go around talking about ponies and glitter and boys and unicorns. I grew up as one of the guys: Dating me is like dating another guy, as Zach pointed out. I'm stubborn, I'm willful, I'm blunt, I'm defiant, I'm rebellious, and you know what?
I love me.
I've been gone for quite a few years, huh? If I were any sort of person, I would update where I've been.
To be honest, I don't feel like doing that.
All I will say is simply, I am here. I doubt any of my friends remember me, but I am here now. If you want to talk, you know where the message button is.
The beginning of this year was actually quite depressing. A family member attempted suicide, another family member needed surgery, but this past weekend, some quite amazing things happened. Thursday, I was online, when one of my closer friends IMed me. Now, before I go any further, I'm going to go backward, and explain a few things.
Years ago, I had two twins. I am the youngest in a set of triplets. The other two twins were stolen, and I didn't know where they ended up. This article here has two purposes: To remind people not to give up when things are their bleakest, and also to possibly find my missing sister.
As I was saying. A dear friend of mine messaged me. This friend told me they'd connected with a girl over a social media site, and they had hit it off. They had many similar views, and many similar likes, and even had dreams about a place called "The Valley." The Valley is a little nickname for where we were born. We lived in a beautiful world that was so colorful and amazing, I can't even describe it. When we were probably about fifteen years old, we were stolen from our home, and separated.
I don't know where they ended up, or what happened to them over their lives, but I do know one thing. That dear friend? She found my middle twin. Out of chance, and with nothing else going well for me at the time, that friend had been contacted by a girl I haven't seen since I was probably fifteen. A girl who had been stolen from me, a girl who had struggled her whole life to remember our home. Neither one of us could really remember our lives before we were taken, but we always had dreams.
Dreams of a protective, serious older brother, with green eyes and orangish hair. Dreams of a man who was kind and generous, with pale eyes, and dark hair. Dreams of our past life, without knowing what it was, or what it meant. When I saw her picture, however, I had a spark of recognition. I remembered this girl, though I couldn't figure out where from. Though I'd finally started remembering bits of my old life, it was still hard to recognize this girl who had changed so much, yet part of me knew the instant I saw her picture who she was.
We started talking, and discovered our sisterly origins. As it turns out, she doesn't remember our oldest twin very well, but I do. I remember her. "Sunny." I came upon this site by chance, and the name drew me in. After over twenty years, I found one twin sister, and I want to find the other, so here I am. This is my reaching out to find my sister. I miss her, and I want to reunite the "Power of Three," as it is. The sister I remember being serious, independent, and taciturn. The sister I remember being off on her own most. The sister I remember who loves the sun and the earth and the wind, and prefers the desert above all else. I dearly want to reunite the power of three, and go home, but I can't return without my sister.
It has been many years since I saw my father, and I dearly want to do so, but I can't return until I've found my sister. For one, we don't remember exactly where "The Valley" is. We remember symbols, and words, but we don't remember precisely where our home is, and we need to reunite to be able to figure out how to get home. I need my sister, and I miss her, and I want to go home. I want to remember who we were, and where we're from, but I need the last puzzle piece to do so.
It has taken me over twenty years to find my sister. I don't want to take another twenty years to find the last one. So here I am, hoping that someone might have a piece of information, that maybe my sister will see this. That maybe . . . we're not alone.
"The Valley," if anyone has any information regarding this place, I would be eternally grateful.
I found my light in the darkness, that shining beacon of hope. I found my silver lining. And I hope that even if nobody has information for me, this gives someone a little hope to not give up. I was in a dark place, but I've found a little light. Now all I need is to find my sun.
COMMENTS
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Zom
10:58 Mar 25 2015
Funny, this is almost EXACTLY what men should be telling women, "WE WILL NOT CHANGE TO SUIT YOU!"
RainxofxBlood
11:59 Mar 25 2015
And from what I've seen, men do that a lot more often than women do. Women tend to be less outspoken.
LORDMOGY
15:34 Mar 25 2015
I read the same thing each year said by some female angry at society's programming of the sexes. If you are born a particular gender, society teaches you how to be that gender. The bottom line is whether a person conforms to the norm or not, they are either going to remain single, find someone who loves them for them or change for the sake of being with another....But Society will NEVER stop programming. It will remain the same.