The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

My first entry. I was sitting here, wanting more than anything to talk to someone, so I decided this was close enough. Have you ever just stared at the phone, and hoped you could make it ring? I've been doing that a lot lately. It never works, yet I keep trying. A part of me is really trying to understand something I don't think I ever will. Its hard, having feelings for someone, and not knowing if they want other people to know. In case you haven't picked up on it yet, I, the hopeless romantic, am in love. But I don't know if he wants other people to know. Sometimes he'll let an "I love you" slip when other people can hear, he'll say things to me in front of others, things I've never had a person say to me before. But then, I don't know. I don't think he wants his friends to know. I'll post little nothing comments on his page, just to show him I'm thinking about him, and I get the feeling that he doesn't want me to. Doesn't want me to say anything that would ever give away what's there. Or maybe, maybe this is all me. Maybe its just in my head. I feel so selfish saying all of this. Wanting so badly for him to just be like, "I love her, she's mine, and I don't care who knows it." But I can't help it. When he's not there, I miss him, and I would tell anyone that. I would scream it to the world, but I don't know if he'd be the one to cover my mouth with his hand. Ha ha, I feel bad for any person I ever have or will fall in love with. I don't think many people can handle this.



Gabrielle