A New Drug
14:27 Jan 17 2008
Times Read: 1,112
'' What happened to you Brandon, you've changed!'' one states.
The air is warm... In the upper left corner of the room, sits a slouched figure in tracksuit pants and a shirt - Comfortable clothing that one wouldn't be caught dead wearing outside. A big monitor to the left, speakers to the right, pictures all over the wall and turquoise carpets covered in kitty fur to keep me company.
So many photos around... Each one reminding me of a particular stage in my life with each stage giving its own set of experiences - In my first uniform, moving up to high school, dropping out of college, singing on stage, tripping during performances while the rest of the locals lust for our attention and now... Smiling next to my mentor.
These pictures remind me of so many things that may be trivial. I've recently set things in motion that unlocked my dreams, my lifestyle and in return executed the person I use to be.
It can be debated, twisted over and analyzed, when it comes down to it, my mindset got me exactly were I never wanted to be.
It took a few relationships to turn to ashes and a few inspirations to make me realize that...
The date is the 14th of the New Year, the place is one that I'm comfortable with - This week has been long and exciting. I found myself running from place to place just like the little bunny in wonderland.
The cell phone beeps - A message reads
'' I'll see you at 10pm. Today we need to celebrate!''
I'm staring at the reflection of the mirror. I can recognize myself. A feeling of warmth and comfort sparkles inside manifesting into a smile.
Everything is in place. Long shiny hair covering a long-sleeved mesh shirt over a pair of pvc pants with enough bondage straps wrapped around for any occasion and 4 inch platforms strapped on with silver buckles on the sides to match my rings. The scene is set.
Five feet away from the club and everyone's staring , thinking '' Look who surfaced!'. I don't blame them. I was saying the same thing looking at the mirror. The reflection is the only thing that links me to my past. They know my lifestyle, they know my presence and a few come over marking their lips over my face.
Once the Meet and greet is over, I see an Uncle Jack waiting for me at the bar. The scientist and two groupies seem to be anticipating a conversation with me while adjusting their hair styles.
As soon as I'm in reaching distance, The Scientist leaps over attaching himself to my shoulders. Once grounded he starts showing me his clothing.
All I see is a cricket who seems to have fallen on the bad side of Sundown - Two inches of thick black lipstick over white clown paint for a face and flat hair that looks like roadkill.
His conversation wasn't any better. It sounded exactly like a fidgeting broken record saying whatever he can not to get his ass kicked in a locker room.
It seems like he believes that he needs to prove something to me which he really doesn't.
It's been awhile since him and I shared more then a few words to each other. He looks up to me and edifies me as being the one who introduced him to the scene.
Behind him stood a round midget with eye-liner stretched out to her ears in a corset tight enough making the rest of her stomach pop out.
Slouched over the bar was her butler and lap dog - A scarecrow in tight pants, a long face hidden over a couple thousand black painted tears with some kind of significance that was beyond my comprehension.
I must've took a total of two minutes of their babble before I turned to Leo and his girlfriend begging for a conversation... Anything to make me look busy. It actually worked. The goon and his bat creatures eventually crawled out of there.
Leo and I started doing some shots the kill off the bad background music. Leo is a great looking guy going through a pill-popping phase who is also an individual I ignored in highschool but then grew closer to when he stood by me when a couple of pricks decided to back stab me.
It's safe to say that he's a guy whom I love and respect.
It must be getting closer to midnight and a gig is about to start which wasn't anything any of us were looking forward to. Lo and behold we found ourselves there staring at a couple of good musicians playing bad music.
At some point Aiwin came along. She's a Russian business associate of mine who knows how to party and is looked at as a prize to be won. In other words, every guy wants to get into her pants. We ended up in bed a couple of months, weeks or days ago... I have no idea what that was and I don't think she does either. My best guess would be a waste of time.
It must be well over 2am now. I'm leaning against a pillar close to the dance floor. I can see that everyone seems to have started swinging and more empty glasses seem to be laying about.
Aiwin seems to be sitting down beside me.
Leo disappeared and was replaced by Joseph - A manic depressive who looks like he was breast-fed till the age of fifteen.
In what seemed to be the climax of his night he goes '' Hey Brandon, what are you doing?''
'' Celebrating my success!'' I reply with certain conviction.
He musters a smile and begs me to tell him more with jealousy and insecurity oozing out of his eyes.
Given the fact that I tried assisting his financial conditions and well being in the past and was kicked away, I decided To add some salt to the wound so I continued '' Changing to part time... I don't need a full time job anymore.''
'Wow Brandon... You've changed.'' He goes.
That line comes out every five minutes into any conversations nowadays.
The music stops and everyone's frozen.
Everything seems so bright and white. I'm ascending up into the clouds. Oh okay... That makes sense. It's so quiet I can hear myself think. My mouth stretches into a smile. I'm at peace with myself. A voice sings '' Life is to be lived ''. I can't see anything but it seems beautiful.
Just like a butterfly coming out of his cocoon shedding it's wings.
I'm still wearing the same clothes from the club.
I can't feel my smile anymore. The music's becoming louder and that brightness turned into white walls. I found myself in a restroom with two women. I couldn't remember how I got there. From what I gathered they wanted me to watch them pee. As amusing as having your own discovery channel can be, I choose to stare at the mirror, get myself together and get myself out of there.
The place is packed and Aiwin gets a tray of shots. After downing that I decide to get another one.
I'm still standing by that column and just as the music starts changing from horrible to a tolerative one, a figure seems to be smiling at me.
After a significant amount of concentration, I came to a conclusion that it's Mel. She happens to be a slim 24 year old clerk exposed in a short black dress with long hair and killer looking stilettos.
She's coming over seemingly leading my hand gestures. After greeting me, she wanted to confirm whether I was drunk or not which I was well on my way by then. A few flirts and games were followed by filling each other up with compliments and more shots were being exchanged.
At some point she came in close however she wouldn't make the first move so it was obvious that neither of us would give in.
After deciding to go back to her friends, I moved out to the dance floor. Perhaps I needed to prove to her want she just missed out on!
Pride And Fall were being played and Just like a wanted prize among a pack of wolves, I quickly found myself surrounded and before you know it, I was dancing with both males, females and even shemales if any were around!
At some point Mel left and Leo returned only to hold my coat as I needed to go to the restroom.
I made my way up there, trying my best to look conscious and responsible resting against the wall.
Some 30 year old blond came up whom I vaguely recall from raves. I believe she introduced herself as Martina. She was giving me shots downstairs so for some reason I decided to pay her back by sticking my lips against hers.
'' oh god, I didn't expect that to happen! '' she explained, which was two seconds before nailing my to the adjacent wall to continue what I started.
After a while I asked her to continue that downstairs and she confessed that her boyfriend was at the bar.
The place seems to have quiet down now. it probably has to do with light being outside...
Something pokes me at the side. I flipped my eyes open to find myself in the back of someone's car.
''Brandon, you passed out. You're home now....''
COMMENTS
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Masque
15:18 Apr 13 2008
Hmm I wonder how that episode in the bathroom REALLY ended :-P
Still can't excuse you for the clerk thing though. BRAT.
NonMortusEst69
20:59 May 13 2009
I believe she went downstairs, her boyfriend cleaned up after me and we both pretended like nothing ever happened.
As for the Clerk thing... oh well....