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Magdalena's Journal


Magdalena's Journal

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2 entries this month
 

17:20 Nov 13 2017
Times Read: 262




Many fragrance enthusiasts connect certain fragrances to certain colors; I, on the other hand, connect them to different songs; for me this song reminds me of one of my favorite fragrances, Encens Mythique D'Orient by Guerlain.

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What About Me?

03:31 Nov 13 2017
Times Read: 312


It is a question I had always neglected to ponder until recent years. Most of my life has always been spent shelving my own feelings and emotions, and being made to feel guilty for having them. It is quite odd that the people who spew bitterness and misery from their tongues expect you to walk on eggshells for them.
Fuck that.

My cold but bleeding heart tends to have a maternal instinct, one that obliges me to nuture and care for the wounded. Though this in itself is not a problem, it certainly becomes a problem when people take but never give, when they never consider your feelings, yearnings, desires. There are those who only think of others when they need a shoulder to cry on. There are those who only think of others during fair weather.
Fuck you.

I am more than a shoulder to cry on, I am more than a fair-weather friend; I am a true friend to those who have earned it. If those are the only times you feel the urge to contact me, do not bother. My life is not a revolving door in which people may come and go on a whim. If you do not wish to be part of my life, your loss. If you do wish to be part of my life, prove it by being there. If you think I only exist for your entertainment...
Fuck you too.

I have spent far too many years neglecting to ask, "What about me?" Instead, I have spent those years caring for ungrateful people who never bothered to return a favor, but who would most definitely be irate when I stopped allowing them to take advantage of me. Excuse me while I don't sit back and allow you to betray me for no reason.
Fuck all of them.

Mind you, I do not ask for much from people, but what I receive is very little if anything at all. There comes a time when I, like anyone else, am allowed to think about myself, to voice my needs and desires, to expect what I deserve, and to not settle for less. ...And if anyone tries to tell you that you are not allowed those liberties...
Fuck them too.

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