I feel shitty, im sick, i can't concentrate and i can't help but feel bad about something...I don't know what....I got the feeling something's going to happen...I don't like my dreams anymore, for some reason i can't can't think in them...and that dream came back...I hate that dream...Im alone in that dream...I hate being alone...I live most of my life surrounded by people and in my dream there's nothing...No birds...no sign of life..
the dream
Im walking down a long empty street, barely any light at all I dont' see anyone, I don't hear anything at all...Im calling out for my mom, my brother, my sister, my grandma, my grandpa....my cousins and even my dad...and no-one answers...All i hear is my voice echoing through the streets there's nobody not a living soul, no birds, no dogs, no people, not even any sound, there's barely any light at all then i come onto a graveyard..and i see the gravestones of all my family....then i see my own
and then i wake up it fucking scarest eh piss out of me
I feel shitty, im sick, i can't concentrate and i can't help but feel bad about something...I don't know what....I got the feeling something's going to happen...I don't like my dreams anymore, for some reason i can't can't think in them...and that dream came back...I hate that dream...Im alone in that dream...I hate being alone...I live most of my life surrounded by people and in my dream there's nothing...No birds...no sign of life..
the dream
Im walking down a long empty street, barely any light at all I dont' see anyone, I don't hear anything at all...Im calling out for my mom, my brother, my sister, my grandma, my grandpa....my cousins and even my dad...and no-one answers...All i hear is my voice echoing through the streets there's nobody not a living soul, no birds, no dogs, no people, not even any sound, there's barely any light at all then i come onto a graveyard..and i see the gravestones of all my family....then i see my own
and then i wake up it fucking scarest eh piss out of me
This morning i woke up at five, I can't tell you what woke me up but it was a feeling...I couldn't shake it off or go back to sleep
Im tired, I woke up at FIVE in the fucking morning you try not to be... i started making pancakes for me, my brother, my sister and my baby cousin ^^ after i finished i went to wake them up and they were all inconsiderate and when they ignored me i started crying :( but i got it all worked out and everyone was happy especially me ^^ I've never been happier...oh wait yes there's one thing i want more than anything in the world I want Andru here i'd never ask for anything else :)
what the fuck am i going to talk about? I never do anything at all online or offline, *sigh* I guess i should look up Tim Hortons online and apply for some jobs so i can save some money :) I need some new clothes and shoes *sigh* My shoes have holes in them *sobs* I need to buy my own clothes, I think im begginning to take a toll on my mother..Im struggling against her rules, and im begginning to chafe at her restrictions, as soon as i can get outta highschool, which i suck at ;-; I failed all my classes except one *sweat drop* But soon i'll get a job and my own place, Then i won't have to worry about anything well i will i'll just be INDEPENDENT wheeeeeeeee and i won't have to worry about her bitching about my choices *rolls eyes* Anyyyways She's always getting on about how i spend more time on the internet grrrr She doesn't understand jack about me, she tries i give her that much, but I've got a lot of shit i keep to myself, and only ppl i know i can trust will find out....
Im bored sitting here, doing data entry for my teachers and i just finished hacking up a lung, it was frighteningly funny i couldn't breathe and all me and my friends could do was laugh...I find that interesting it made me realize something, I dont' fear very much in this world, Spiders, clowns, and heights scare the fuck outta me, but Death, i think the most important thing of all doesn't....I would rather die laughing and full of life than pale and withered on a hospital bed,
Do not go gentle into that good night
a very interesting line from this poem....I was told to analyze it or discuss it in class, the poet is actually talking to his father....I don't know if this will make any sense but it's what im thinking of at the moment.....
Rage Rage against the dying of the light
Quite interesting don't you think? The poet is fighting and struggling against something he cannot stop.....
Meh I don't see why im posting this, not many people will read my journal i think, barely any read my profile, but if anyone can read this and tell me exactly what poem this is from i'll commend you because i myself have forgotten
Ok im sick and im tired, but not mad at all
I got a shit load of cookies and Im happy, but last night i couldn't sleep and i maybe got 2 hours of sleep at the most and my mom made me go to school today :) but that's ok im trying to get an online messenger that'll work on this stupid school network....*sighs* what can i do though i need a fucking job and a bank account and gawd i forgot kids where in here and i swore =O dammmn my bad
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