The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

Redneckary 101



Being from the South I find it humorous that you can actually break down the rednecks into groups. If you're not from the South, I'm sorry but what you see on TV is NOT real...well not all the time anyway. This information might be shocking but it's all true...



I'll start with the good ol' boys from Georgia. These rednecks are armpit fartin, beer drinkin, Trailor park livin people that keep both their dogs and wallets on a chain. They claim to hunt and proudly display the Rebel Flag. They might fish, but otherwise these rednecks are more of white trash. The redneck games are held in East Dublin, Georgia. The games themselves are down-and-dirty events like bobbing for pig's feet, seed spitting, dumpster diving, hubcap hurling, bug zapping by spitball, an armpit serenade and a big-hair contest. The defining moment, though, is the mud pit belly flop, mostly entered by those with beer bellies and peek-a-boo butt cracks. The trophy is a crushed and mounted Bud Light can, disappointingly empty. L-Bow, the grand guru of the event, claims they're "just plain good ol' boys and gals who'd give you the shirt off their back, although it's doubtful you'd want it". 



Moving west to Alabama...now these rednecks mean business. Inbred business that is. They are classified as the worst kind of redneck you can possibly be. They are known for not having many teeth, overweight, and banjo playin. These are the rednecks you see on TV. 



Looosiana is my favorite kind of redneck. Why? *laughs* cuz I am one *winks* We live in the swamps ready with our shot guns to kill a Gator. If not, well sorry sonny no dinner tonight. We also hunt wild game such as deer, turkey, and fish. The rich rednecks go to farmed areas and hunt elk, antelope, and 10 point deer. I know you're thinking how can there be a rich redneck? Well, we're all rednecks way down here! We are The Rajun Cajuns with Slap Ya Mama's seasoning (my favorite) and crawfish boils. 



Last classification are the ones from Po' dunk Mississippi. Both of my parents were born there and still reside there. These rednecks own acres of land that only belongs to family and I'll be DAMNED if anyone other than family buys it. They are the Primative Baptists that believe everything is evil. They have beagles only used for coon huntin. This my grandfather still does. He also sits on his front porch with a shot gun to shoot snakes that come up from the creek. 



They all have some of the same traits and frankly a redneck is a redneck. But this proves some have more class than others. *crushes beer can on forehead* y'all come back now ya here! 



**Have more you'd like to add? Leave a comment or message me**