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as if some sick joke i was given the horid job of bein the bearer of sorrow this am to my christian mother...

my cousin was found in his addict suposivly by his pregnut wife with a nuse around his neck--well unlike my mother my aunt and i are of the old ways and faith and we have looked further into this tradgey-- she asked the cards and wondered if id came up with the same answeres and conclusions..

well before i was able to read my tarot cards tonight my cousinhim self decided to make a visit straight from the grave so to speak-- he always was one of dramatic aprochaes but daym y so close to samhain and y me?lol



hell my wife thought id fallen alseep until shed noticed that i was in a trance and she saw his saddneded spirit ;look straight at her..

his name was John Henry_Jh for short..he told me that hed goten too deep into his job so too speek i cant say much lets just say he was a double agent alas since his wife is still alive and i dont wana cause my family any more danger or grief than what they are already enduring..

he showed--merley spoke of how he was foreced to watch this call boythreaten to ice his wife with child as an assult riffle was pirecing her tummy while he was being forced to put the nuse around his neck..

there was no cover over his face ...my cousin watched as her hubby was murdered..

much saddness folowss my heart tonight!!!





samhain is one of our sabbatts and yet its gona bring sorrow to my family

this is my offical entry since all hell broke loose within my so called stable life ...i thought i had everything planned out to the second yano...alas..the great wise anscestors and gods and goddesses love to uproot our balance and shove trials down our throughts sometimes it feels....

back around my 7th aniversary with midnightjoker72-----an old VR addict-- my husband until this day...crys..this date was may 5th-07..and i post it cause i want it forever membered!

long story short he became missing...noone knows all the true truth save the gods what happened..thers speculations that cant be mentioned here because of a on goin investagation....



more another day.....



crys..