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I am going to be going through a big life change and some people are mad at me and some try and understand...I am going to be getting a divorce and its going to be tough because he is a good man but i need more than what he can give me...not money or attention that is not what i am needing, i need to be me and so that is where i heading slowly....what do you do when your an empath and all the emotions you feel from someone you know you caused, hard to live with yourself but i have to push forward....grown up decisions suck!!!

Okay i am thinking I might be done with this stressful stupid life (not really but have to vent)...when does it come time for me to think about me? I have raised my kids, they are adults. I have made everyone my top priority for so long i don't remember me anymore so its time for me to break loose and do what i need to do and so i am...i don't like the fact that i have to hurt some feelings to do this but they need to understand why i have to do this, my sanity depends on it...i have to find me again she has been forgotten all those years or has she ever been found, i don't know and that's what i have to find is me. I really don't mean to hurt anybody with this decision but my whole life no one has worried about if they hurt me...its not like a I'll show you thing not at all...this is something in my heart i have to do and i love the people in my life but i have got to do this or i might not be here anymore...your mind can kill you if you let it....

Had a bipolar meltdown last night, thats what i call them anyway....i hope I didn't offend anyone last night because I blacked out and don't remember a damn thing and I erased my inbox and my sent box so I can't even look back and see who i might need to apologize to....If I did or said anything offensive please except my apology please or message me and we can chat about whatever....

I don't know if I'm coming or going lately, my sister is in the hospital and I was so scared I locked up, see I already lost a brother and a sister i don't think I could make it through losing another....i almost didn't make it through before, lets just say I tried to bail on life and it didn't work cause I am still here but thankfully she is okay at this moment...I have not been taking things in life to well and feel like bailing again, I fought really hard lastnight and I am here this morning so I can say I beat it but I don't know about next time. I don't understand where all this is coming from, all of my emotions all of my energy is everywhere and very hard getting back in control... just a few days ago I thought I was getting stronger but I guess I assumed wrong...or maybe when your like I am this is the price you pay for being born with so called gifts...nothing in life is for free! Maybe my payment is my sanity!!!

Okay venting big time, I have many gay friends and so far all of them agree with me, someone does not turn you gay, you either like one or the other....there is no I had s relationship with a girl and she was so mean to me i decided I like getting it the other way...no no no fuck no!!! My best friend since i was 18 is a lesbian and she knew she was a lesbian at a very very young age but did not come out later in life because of how judgmental society is but then decided she had to be herself, which I love her for choosing her happiness finally...but these little bitches who were married or dating someone trying to fight their own feelings, CANNOT blame anyone for them being gay and saying your going to tell the courts that LMMFAO....Really tell the judge I am gay because we didn't have a good relationship omfg really!! You are not gay you are a little whiny bitch who needs slapped upside your stupid ass head....you give the gay and lesbian population a bad name, they are hoping it just a phase for you stupid ass!!!

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DevilishlyDarkGoddess
14:45 Dec 16 2013

okay, so Brad is starting his shit again...will he ever learn not to mess with our blood? wii he never learn we can be dangerous.....tell ours she better handle it or we will....smh..some people

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shellsbells
17:00 Dec 16 2013

yup, being gay is something you are or aren't.. like being born left handed or right handed.. or maybe some are even ambidextrous, :)

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Having a bad couple of nights and If I seem aggressive or paranoid its because I am at the moment....Damn doctors fuck you up with these meds and expect you to be okay!!!

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Chonrie
13:29 Dec 02 2013

Sweet Kisses And Huggs

For You.

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Dakotah
01:01 Dec 12 2013

Anytime you want to talk message me. Always here for you my friend. And you can be how ever you are. Remember your not alone and you do have friends here who will just hold your hand and help you though the bad times.

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krystal
14:17 Dec 16 2013

tell me about it

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Okay, so tonight I am drinking and trying to shake things off, so if I say anything that may be forward or not like me then you know why....forgive me me tonight so we can be cool tomorrow haha!! Be Well...