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Today is long as I climb the ranks.
I hate climbing, it's an endless game. And unless I'm climbing a body to be able to take it as my own.. to bite it, to it apart.. to ride it.. then I don't want to climb.
I don't want to be touched. Don't want to feel.
To feel is too understand, and to understand means pain. Pain in which I only enjoy if it's the kind I can't physically control.
Pain mixed with pleasure, it's numbing.

I assume that's why I'm like this. Empty and devoid of all that which others hold dear.

And do here I am again. Climbing that which I hate. When I'd rather be climbed upon.