The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

from the phone insurance company site (actual cut n paste)



"What Type of Identification Do We Need?

All forms of identification must be legible, unaltered, and legitimate. (Don’t draw a mustache on your picture!) If the ID appears altered, forged or not legitimate, we have to get an Asurion Insurance Adjuster to review the claim in its entirety (really slows things down)."

I was in Sea Scouts for a few years and quickly filled a load of roles including but not limited to: Cook, Medic, Engineer, Storyteller, Bard, Judge, Jailer, Joker, Cadence caller, Inventor of alternative Morse code and semi fore, counselor, Instigator, Namer, Motivator, Inventor of threats and punishments, Medical stuff procurement officer and dispenser, Stuff painter, Barber, whatever they call the person who finds lost stuff, the artist, Bilge rat, and general purpose smart ass. I'm sure there is more but I'm tired and this is off the top of my head. I told you it was complicated.



NOTE: Navigation and helm are NOT on the list... There is a reason for that.

Twice today I spoke on my mobile phone twice in two stores. Once I answered and once I called. Both calls were along the lines of "Where did you go?"



I get lost. More to the point I get bored and wander off or I'm distracted by something or other. Walking with a group I'll see something and stop, they keep going. Bank I'm misplaced again. Most of the calls I get are of the "Hey where are you?" variety. If it were not for cell phones I'd probably spend a great deal of time on a leash.



My third cardinal cell sin of the day was at the theater. I didn't answer. I had it on "cheap thrill" (vibrate) and I took it out of my pocket to push the ignore button.



I got home and hit the floor running. I was thinking 2.5 steps ahead which is something I try to avoid. "Stuff new pants that fit in the washer, dash to the bathroom to forget why, see hair and decide that it looks a lot like a purple and blue cocker spaniel, washer isn't full enough-must hunt dark clothes. *trots around hunting dark cloths and notices jeans I was wearing are dark* Into the bedroom to empty jacket pockets on bed. Whip off shoes and pants. Trot back to the washer and stuff in jeans and jacket... ~PING~ Another revelation! My shirt was dark blue as well. Whip whip and it's in the washer too. Great the washer is going, I'm getting stuff done, now for stretch pants and an old t shirt. Ahhh that's the stuff. Grab my laptop and water and it's back down stairs to work on a project. I'll be ahead (HA!) and I'll have a cushion of time... Hey was that my phone ringing on vibrate? *pats hips and notes that stretch pants have no pockets* The washer starts the spin cycle... *looks up as feeling of doom sweeps over*



Yes I washed it. I washed my chap stick too but it doesn't make me feel better. Consolation from a friend while making the call to switch my phone number back to my old phone. "At least is wasn't a toilet." My thought to that? "If I'd answered it at the theater it would have been the toilet at WAL*MART." (My clothes are drying now and yes I located and removed the chap stick... )

I think I would either top it and put it on a table by my front door for holding keys and spare change and so on. Or better yet go to a craft store for a cork to stop up the hole in the bottom and use a dremmel (sp?) to grind a slot near the top for a piggy bank... I'd do the grinding outside on a breezy day. (Sitting up wind of course!) Cutting bone has altogether a distinct smell that many find unpleasant. A center piece at a dinner party would get some rumors flying. I think my favorite would be just handing it to people to see the looks on their faces. Seriously what do you say to that in a casual conversation? I guess there is always paint but I kind of like the natural bone color. For now I'm using it on a semi regular basis.

So here I am the only one home. Being lazy and sorting through my closet... I opened the window and blind for the cat. My room is on the second floor and she acts like "queen of the hood" sitting on my window sill. I'd been in my PJ's all day and decided to get dressed. I've been listening to music all day and as I was at the time HOME ALONE I just to amuse myself started dancing. *looks at floor* The whole thing went the way of a sort of strip tease. you know, slipping out of my shirt while trying some belly dance moves I saw on YouTube. Play with my shirt glancing in my dresser mirror to see if I am moving right. Concentrating on things. Then I decide to throw in a circle turn thing and my eyes cross the window and see the guy who lives behind me in his yard shutting up his two big giant dogs who I assume were barking at the cat in the window. His mouth can open really really big. I'm not answering my door for at least a month.

My Granddad died last night. If anyone comes around wondering where I am or what happened. There ya go.