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6 entries this month
WHEW
01:23 May 24 2010
Times Read: 594
Good grief! have I missed you! I have been ungodly busy! This past week I didnt know if I was coming or going. I have been working and taking care of mom and Shel's graduation was this past Thursday. Maybe things will start to settle down now that it is summer. I hope but its only 2 weeks until I go to the beach! WOOT! But mom is going with so it might be a very big hassle. 8 hours in a car with my mom and two kids under 12. Am I crazy? lol I hope not......
I went swimming today. It was fun. And hot as hell! I am burned up! I think I deserve a break after the hell I have been putting up with lately.
I am getting a new chihuahua on Friday. I cant wait. Can anyone give me any cool Spanish names that arent perverted or dirty? lol
time
18:46 May 10 2010
Times Read: 602
i miss being here. i have been so busy lately. since mom fell and ****'* graduation, i have no time for anything. there isn't enough hours in the day. i am so tired. and planning the birthday tea party has exhausted my body and my wallet. i am scraping to get by. i went over board, i know. but she is only little once and i want her to have a great day.
but i am beat. wore down. i would like to go lie down and sleep for at least a couple days. zzzzzzzz
what? lol jk (being silly again, i must be getting delirious! lol)
im hoping i can make through the meeting tonight, i am soooo sleepy.
new phone
02:55 May 09 2010
Times Read: 608
today has been ok. however the hub decided to get a new phone before telling me. the reason this bothers me, is bc "we dont have money for ------insert reason here-----" but then he goes and gets him a new phone and then keeps me up half the night last night, programming it.
he said that he would get me a new phone. if he wants to, that is fine but we just got our phones like 6 months ago. i just dont get why he would say "we dont have money for ...." but then wastes money for THAT. go figure.... i will never understand the "men thinking" oh well..... but who knows? maybe he is holding out funds that i dont know of
who has the droid? tell me what you think, should i get one or no?
blended
18:31 May 05 2010
Times Read: 611
i am so tired. i have not gotten a good nights sleep in days. everything is running together. i have been so worried lately. there have been so many arguments it is pathetic. the kids, although i love them, have been impossible.
tomorrow is grandparents day and they wont have one there. the only one that cares to come cant. which is bullshit. but she cant help it. but the other members of the family could. but they are assholes. they fucking only care about themselves and their problems. wah!
their own father wont be at my daughters graduation. he may not even see her for her birthday. oh well, its his loss. sorry fucker.
the days are long and drawn out. i cant keep up with all the shit i have to do. i dont even know if this makes sense. all i know is that the kids are upsetting me, this situation that has come about with mom is upsetting me, i am tired and pissy. i can only hope that it gets better soon.
ah! soooo tired
22:11 May 03 2010
Times Read: 613
its been a long day. Work was crazy but it flew by in a flash. Had to do some things for mom while she waited for me in the car. That was an experience, let me tell you. Plus the lady at the bank didnt give us the right amount back and mom freaked. she says the whole world is against her. We worked it out and she got her money but not with out a hassle. I felt really bad. I cant believe how much I actually love this woman.
( when I was growing up, I was evil to her and honestly thought I hated her. What was wrong with me? *smacks forehead*)
Any way, after driving around for a while, it starts to wear ya out. I got her back and fed the dog, washed the dishes, got everything she may need within reach. left, went to get the kids and it has been a big argument up until my son cried himself to sleep. I almost cried because it breaks my heart to let him cry but there was no way I was gonna let his friend come over today, I feel like crap ands sooooo tired. I need a vacation.
send me to the beach......
what a week!
20:53 May 01 2010
Times Read: 624
well it has been a hell of a fucking week. it started out ok and wednesday my mom fell in her yard, dislocating her artificial hip. she laid in the yard for 10 minutes before anyone heard her. scared me to fucking death. Was at the hospital off and on for three days. I am so damn tired but here I am, lol. My mom is home and on a walker. I will be with her off and on daily for a while seeing as she has to be on a walker for six damn week. gggrrrr idk if this is going to ruin my beach trip. but at least she is ok, idk what i would do with out her. I realized that I love her so damn much that it would destroy me to lose her. It also made me realize that she is going to die one day and it is getting closer. Which upsets me greatly. When I lost my dad I nearly died. Part of me did die with him in 1994. I have not been the same since. There has never been anyone to fill that void. And noone will fill the void of my mom. I wish that we could live forever and never have to experience death. This has given me a new outlook on things. If someone aggravates you, dont be mean to them, for one day they may not be here. I only wish to have long and joyful days all the days I am alive. I am going to start taking more pictures for memories for one day we will all be gone and our childrens children can see what we were like. *sigh* it sucks getting older and growing up.
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