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Tonight.. (or early this morning..depending on weather or not you've slept).. one of my dearest friends.. lost her baby... its sad... honestly.. because on the drive there her husband decided to pick a fight... which was the worst thing to do.. cause then she lost the kid and now wants to kill him...



This.. this reminds me of 4 years ago for me... mainly because of the fact that right now my friend is so pissed off at her husband its not even funny..

I miscarried.. 4 years ago this month.. (actually in a few days it'll be 4 years..).. a certain person.. sat there.. on the computer.. not sure what to do for me.. while I ran around in pain losing our child...



after that.. I began to resent him.. to the point I began to hate him... when looking back on it... all I should've done was just asked him.. if he was alright... maybe not while I was in the process of losing our child.. but maybe... the next day... just.. talking to him.. finding out why he did what he did... Maybe this is just rambling... but.. it took a while to actually be able to get this out.. understand it I guess..

and eventually... he'll understand too....





I'm sorry for the other things .... and I'm sorry that you considered our engagement.. a mistake... I never did.. and never will...