The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

I sit here trying to figure this mess out...



my life...



with all its intricate details that drive me more mad then not....



Im alot more complicated then I want to be..but I was made the way I am ....



but now I seem so much more weaker then I use to be...



where do I get back that strength that was stolen from me?...



there are so many more questions then answers..it feels like anyway...



*sighs*....



half the time...I want to cry and laugh at the same time...



the other half...I want to scream....



all I can do is just pray...



I will find a new way....



that I will be shown a new way ...not to feel or be so weak...

My mind seems to be in overload....everything seems to be changing again...so fast....but I still cant seem to find my path yet....I really need to be careful...but I dont know how...or what to look for...how is one suppose to be able to read another appropriately...when one does not know their selves anymore....how can one figure out which emotion is whose... it is more then draining...frustrating that my intuition is feeling off.... I need to know which way to turn...I need to be able to make this life work even with missing pieces...if for nothing else...them...



I do know what I have to do....but now there is the huge question of how?...



hence...the title....



And thennnnnn?

Today...I am looking at myself a bit more....working on the things I need to but...I can tell Im not taking care of myself...learning the hard way...I am going to have to take the time or watch as I fall apart...I know so much but so little about myself....so much to learn...and with Gods help and grace...I look forward to the journey for the first time in a really long time....



write more soon...