This is me, from tonight.
16:43 Sep 22 2007
Times Read: 861

11:51 Sep 20 2007
Times Read: 862

So i'm gonna redo my profile. soon. yes. don't know when though... as i'll be busy this weekend. hmm. but it will be done.

Grr.
21:04 Sep 19 2007
Times Read: 864

You know what shits me? Newbies who rate you low because you've had a disagreement with them somewhere else. Point in case... just got rated a 5 by a lil 16 year old girlie because I told her to put an open question in her forum thread... not a closed question. First of all... do they not realise that as a premium member I can SEE what they rate... even if they don't leave a comment? Second of all, my ratings at level 26 HURT. Overall her rating me a 5 dropped my status down by .03. My going back and giving her a 1 however... dropped her back into the 8's.



Do NOT piss me off children. Life is not treating me with respect lately and I've had about enough.

Opiate
01:27 Sep 19 2007
Times Read: 867

When friendliness becomes protectiveness... when does protectiveness become

possessiveness... when does possessiveness become obsession...???

I put my stamp on you and you're mine now...

If I could change what I am I would.

Choices always were a problem for you.


What you need is someone strong to guide you.


Deaf and blind and dumb and born to follow,


what you need is someone strong to guide you..


like me, like me, like me, like me





If you want to get your soul to heaven,


trust in me .


Now don't you judge or question.


You are broken now ,


but faith can heal you.


Just do everything I tell you to do.


Deaf and blind and dumb and born to follow.


What you need is someone strong to guide you.


Deaf and blind and dumb and born to follow.


Let me lay my holy hand upon you.





My Gods will


becomes me.


When he speaks out,


he speaks through me.


He has needs


like I do.


We both want


to rape you.





Jesus Christ, why don't you come save my life now


Open my eyes and blind me with your light





If you want to get your soul to heaven,


trust in me .


Now don't you judge or question.


You are broken now ,


but faith can heal you.


Just do everything I tell you to do.





Jesus Christ, why don't you come save my life now.


Open my eyes, blind me with your light now.





Deaf and blind and dumb and born to follow,


Let me lay my holy hand upon you.





My Gods will


becomes me.


When he speaks,


he speaks through me.


He has needs


like I do.


We both want


to rape you!


 

Words of Wisdom from a friend
10:04 Sep 17 2007
Times Read: 869


Sam says:

the only thing you have to lose at the moment is the opportunity to have a good time

Sam says:

concentrate on that and enjoying it and not focusing on what it could be

Sam says:

and if is going to happen it will and if it doesn't at least you have had a damm good time

Sam says:

and along the way you might discover what you really want and the kind of guy you would like to have in your life

13:50 Sep 16 2007
Times Read: 870

There are times when everything seems ok, and times, like tonight, when I want to curl up into a little ball in the darkest corner I can find and never come out.



I know the world is full of possibilities. Just... Why can't they find me?



Possibilities no longer interest me. I want realities.



This life no longer interests me. I hate the mediocrity of it all. I want something exciting, something that captures my heart and mind and imagination and runs away with it all. To build castles in the clouds and dance amongst the raindrops as they fall.



And someone to share it with... That most of all...

11:00 Sep 15 2007
Times Read: 871

i don't understand guys. honestly, i don't.













cloud says:

hey hey

Juwee says:

heya

Juwee says:

how was yum cha?

cloud says:

didn't eat much

cloud says:

had like a couple of things and that was it

Juwee says:

awww

cloud says:

i had beer instead

cloud says:

i just woke up gtoo

Juwee says:

heh ok

cloud says:

nice life

Juwee says:

yes, yes it is =P

Juwee says:

i'll go to bed early tonight i think

Juwee says:

catch up on sleep

cloud says:

hehehe

cloud says:

all those late msgs

Juwee says:

yesh

cloud says:

you ok?

cloud says:

you seem distant

Juwee says:

am tired

Juwee says:

mum has a friend over

Juwee says:

i was gonna go out tonight but i cancelled coz i didn't know anyone

cloud says:

:(

cloud says:

ew always say...

cloud says:

if only you were here

Juwee says:

indeed =P

cloud says:

should i have a tie to this event?

Juwee says:

nah

Juwee says:

at least i don't think so

Juwee says:

dressy casual doesn't usuallyu mean a tie

cloud says:

hrm

cloud says:

i always like to look good for my dates

Juwee says:

hehe

Juwee says:

you'll outdress me =p

cloud says:

hrm

cloud says:

i tend to do that

cloud says:

it makes up for my insecurities

Juwee says:

pff

Juwee says:

what insecurities do you have =P and why

Juwee says:

lol

cloud says:

i'm like that

cloud says:

i invent problems for myself

Juwee says:

tsk tsk

cloud says:

i'm emo like that

cloud says:

i'm goign to get ready for dinner and stuff

Juwee says:

alrighy

cloud says:

talk to you soon gorgeous girl

cloud says:

cheer up too!

Juwee says:

am i not cheerful? =P

cloud says:

don't seem it for some reason

Juwee says:

ah. should try to hide it better then huh.

cloud says:

no silly you should tell me everything

Juwee says:

you have to go get ready for dinner *pokes*

Juwee says:

maybe later

cloud says:

long list huh

cloud says:

ok hun

cloud says:

*cuddles*

08:44 Sep 15 2007
Times Read: 875

The sound of the needle punching through the cartilage was almost... but not quite... the same as the sound of the bubble bursting.

Last night...
00:03 Sep 15 2007
Times Read: 876

...I was up far too late talking to lovely people in here and outside and got about 5 hour's sleep if that. Lol.



I had a series of the loveliest and most awwww-y txt messages from my Cloud last night in the early hours of the morning plus 2 (yes 2) phone calls. Lol.



For example, from him: "I hug a pillow every night wishing it was a more tangible version of you. Someone who is down to earth and likes me for me, attractive inside and out to boot."



AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!



The upshot is that I invited him to come to a friend's wedding with me on the 29th. I have a date. Liek, zomg!!! He's gonna fly up on the Thursday night, spend the day with his folks on Friday, then come over to my place on Friday night, and we'll go up to the wedding on Saturday. I have a hotel room *grins* ... I'm sooooooo excited! And at the same time... soooooo nervous!!! >.> I mean... what if he sees me and wants to go running in the other direction... *agonises*



But at least I invited him. And he said yes! Still reeling over that one. Lol. (thank you IM haha)



I discovered last night that my matchmaking skills are not the best. Mainly because I don't know enough people. Heh.



And that apologising for being an idiot is a good thing sometimes.







Well. Today I'm off to Chermside to get some stuff done, am going out tonight apparently... still don't have confirmation though meeting up with Scybermonk from in here for SCHVERKRAFT... I was all excited to go at first, now I'm thinking... argh! people! new people! what to wear! omg!!!! the pain!!!!



So yeah. Pity I'm so old and fat these days. Lol.



Anyhoo. I've got alot to do today so I better pull my finger out and get it done. Ciao bellas =)

14:09 Sep 13 2007
Times Read: 877

killingbee. it's my new nick. is it me??? does it reflect who i am??? soft and fuzzy and deadly???

...waiting...
14:03 Sep 13 2007
Times Read: 878

I laughed so hard when I read this... I just had to share ;)
10:30 Sep 12 2007
Times Read: 882

Little Red Riding Hood was getting ready to go and deliver a basket of goodies to Grandmother when her mother stopped her, saying "Little Red, you had better be careful in the woods because the Big Bad Wolf is out today. If he catches you, he is going to lift up your little red dress, pull down your little red panties and fuck your little red socks off."



"Oh I'll be all right," Little Red answered as she pulled out a rather large shotgun from the basket she was carrying. Assured that her daughter would be safe, she allowed Little Red to leave the house and begin the journey to Grandmother's house.



Along the trail in the woods Little Red came across her friends the three little pigs (don't ask what they are doing in the woods, after all it is just a joke)



"Little Red, Little Red," they called to her, "you had better be careful because the Big Bad Wolf is in the woods today. He said that if he catches you, he is going to lift up your little red dress, pull down your little red panties and fuck your little red socks off."



After showing them the shotgun and assuring her friends that she would be all right, Little Red continued her journey to Grandmother's.



Just then the Big Bad Wolf appeared and he said, "Little Red at last I found you. You know what's going to happen now, right? I am going to lift up your little red dress, pull down your little red panties and fuck your little red socks off."



"I don't think so..." Little Red replied as she leveled the shotgun at the wolf. She then lifted up her little red dress, and pulled down her little red panties and said, "you're going to eat me just like the book says...."

You can't be serious.
14:10 Sep 11 2007
Times Read: 884

So I've noticed the... shall we say IQ level of the average forum poster decreasing rapidly lately.



This thread is the latest shining example. What is the difference between Paganism and Wicca? I think it's spelled out quite clearly. But no, everyone has to put their own little bit in... one's more earthy than the other... *rolls eyes*.



For god's sake people, at least have the humanity to at PRETEND to research a little before you post your dribble as divinely inspired truth or the handed down wisdom of the ages.

You're a whispering water, a secret for me to hear
12:49 Sep 10 2007
Times Read: 886


Juwee says:

*pounces* ^^

cloud says:

:D

Juwee says:

hey there you

cloud says:

what's crackin' babe

Juwee says:

crackin? hehe not much

Juwee says:

how about you?

cloud says:

aout to hit bed

cloud says:

came on to say hi

Juwee says:

awwww just for me ^^

Juwee says:

*huggles*

cloud says:

yah

cloud says:

:D

Juwee says:

=)

Juwee says:

awww fanks babe ^^

cloud says:

how was your day?

Juwee says:

heh don't ask. lol

Juwee says:

but is all better now ^^

cloud says:

lovely huh

cloud says:

wonderful

Juwee says:

it was very trying =P

cloud says:

hehehe

cloud says:

as long as it's all better now

Juwee says:

it is ^^

cloud says:

ok hun .. i'm going to head to bed now

cloud says:

i'll talk to you tomorrow

Juwee says:

okies hunni =)

cloud says:

*cuddles*

Juwee says:

ni night sleep well *hugs n kisses*

11:00 Sep 09 2007
Times Read: 888

Right I'm fucking PISSED... I've just updated my status and I'm back down to fucking 1% of level 26... previously I was at 52%. This fucking sucks. I've now been at 1% for nearly 2 weeks. Gah!!!!

Millenium!
01:58 Sep 09 2007
Times Read: 889








P.S. I like buttsecks.

Today.
13:29 Sep 08 2007
Times Read: 892

...was a fairly fun day. Bridal shower held for a friend. Started a little quietly, a room full of older women I don't know. But then the alcohol came out and it warmed up quite well =) We tasted all these new and exciting types, and had wine and liqueurs... mmm yummy. I ended up buying about $100 worth >.>. Oh one of the nicest ones was a bottle of gold flecked wine. Bought one of them too. Ima save that for something / someone special ;)



Anyways after most people had left, my friend Heather got this phone call from one of her friends to say, hey come over we're having a sex toy party. So what do a bunch of slightly inebriated women do??? Damn straight they go to the sex toy party!



Started off a little dubiously... held outside for one thing and it was freezing as... then it started raining so we moved inside and got warmed up again. The lingerie was nice... but in american sizing so ever so tiny. Besides, I have no one to wear it for =(.



Then the toys got passed around. Did you know the best way to test how you will respond to a vibrator is to put it up to the tip of your nose? Apparently the tip of the nose and the clitoris have very similar bunches of nerve endings. All I could say was, I've never masturbated my nose before...



The best part was however, the fact that the audience was primarily composed of lesbians. And we're not talking the lipstick variety. Oh no these were bull dyke lesbians, all big and strong and hefty and pierced and tattooed and shaved and whatnot... I felt slightly intimidated the entire time I was there. I have nothing against lesbians (though I prefer the company of gay guys) but these girls... they scared me. Lol.



So anyways I spent far too much money there again. Some equipment (to replace mine coz they're wearing out >.>) and this really fantastic balm which you put on your bits to make them all warm and tingly, and omg it worked.... lol. I ended up paying for the bride's stuff as well because she wanted hers delivered before the wedding which is on the 29th and it wouldn't have happened otherwise. She'll pay me back. I know where she lives =P



So yeah that was pretty good =)



What else. Ummm I got a new phone yesterday so spent the morning trying to figure out how it works. Eventually I got internet connectivity through it. Wahoo! Still working out plot details for my new Vampire game. It's coming along swimmingly so far. Got the house to myself this weekend and no-one to make the most of it with =( Although the cloudy situation may be clearing up a little. I hope.



Anyhoo. Toodles.

grrrs
10:04 Sep 06 2007
Times Read: 893

stupid frickin vr levelling system... i've been at 1% of level 26 for the past week and haven't shifted at all... i've rated like 200 profiles in just the last couple of days you'd think i'd be up to at least 15% by now... dammit >.>



oh and it's cold and wet and windy. and i've got pms.



*walks off kicking random stuff*

so confused...
10:30 Sep 05 2007
Times Read: 895

cloud says:

:D

cloud says:

i'm at work

cloud says:

making up time

cloud says:

:D

Juwee says:

hey hunny =)

Juwee says:

making up time? what for?

cloud says:

i'm taking half a day off tomorrow for movers

cloud says:

they gave me a rough time of 12 hours

Juwee says:

lol

Juwee says:

you moving?

cloud says:

no .. my stuff from QLD

Juwee says:

ohhhhhh

Juwee says:

gotcha

Juwee says:

much coming down?

cloud says:

no idea

cloud says:

about 8-10 boxes i believe

Juwee says:

not too much

cloud says:

yah

cloud says:

thge necessary stuff

cloud says:

dvd.. surround sound

Juwee says:

hehe

cloud says:

http://smg.photobucket.com/albums/v667/purecloud81/?action=view¤t=Photo0065.jpg

cloud says:

me at work ;)

Juwee says:

awww lookit you =P

cloud says:

look at me doing nothing?

Juwee says:

lol

Juwee says:

well... maybe

Juwee says:

you're unfocused that's for sure

cloud says:

hahahaha

cloud says:

that's my style here at work

cloud says:

i think it's starting to show

Juwee says:

fuzzy?

Juwee says:

hehe

cloud says:

i'm coming out of the "newbie" shell

Juwee says:

always good

cloud says:

therefore cracking what could be seen as "unwanted" jokes

Juwee says:

lol why doesn't that surprise me =P

cloud says:

"you're giving me this because i'm black aren't you"

cloud says:

etc

Juwee says:

hehe

Juwee says:

how long you working til?

cloud says:

hrm

cloud says:

whenenver

Juwee says:

aww

cloud says:

i'll get to sleep in tomorrow

Juwee says:

how come?

cloud says:

half a day off remember

Juwee says:

oh yeh >.> doh

Juwee says:

blonde moment =P

cloud says:

you don't listen to me do you?

cloud says:

i see..

Juwee says:

i do =(

cloud says:

let's hope the weekend means alot of nothing installed

cloud says:

how about you>

Juwee says:

um... i believe i'm going to a bridal shower on saturday

cloud says:

hrm

cloud says:

all those clucky women

Juwee says:

yes

cloud says:

wish i was there

Juwee says:

lol

Juwee says:

i think they're all married

Juwee says:

except me

cloud says:

lovely

cloud says:

i hate that

cloud says:

"all couples" crpa

Juwee says:

yeah

Juwee says:

me too

Juwee says:

way to make yourself feel even more worthless than usual >.> lol

cloud says:

hrm..

cloud says:

meh

cloud says:

don't feel like that

cloud says:

not your fault you haven't found me yet

cloud says:

:D

Juwee says:

lol

Juwee says:

well well =P

cloud says:

you're waiting fo ra date still aren't you

Juwee says:

*shrugs*

cloud says:

... oh it's like that hey...

cloud says:

i see

Juwee says:

no >.>

Juwee says:

don't be silly

Juwee says:

i don't want to push anything is all

cloud says:

i'd tell you if you wer eimposing 

cloud says:

in fact

cloud says:

i'd go as far as saying.. well.. not asking in teh first plavce

Juwee says:

i'm not asking?

cloud says:

i meant me

Juwee says:

ohhh

cloud says:

i mean in the end if i didin't want you here. i wouldn't of asked

cloud says:

i'm just debating a good weekend

Juwee says:

indeed

Juwee says:

define "good" =P

cloud says:

"free" is another word i could of used

Juwee says:

lol

cloud says:

a weekend i can write off

Juwee says:

well. write better next time i'm not that psychic

Juwee says:

=P

cloud says:

you shoudl be

cloud says:

it's a requirement of mine

Juwee says:

hehe

Juwee says:

and your other requirements ??

cloud says:

that's about it

cloud says:

"as long as you love me"

cloud says:

so backstreet boys huh ;)

Juwee says:

heh i dunno =P

Juwee says:

is cute though ^^

cloud says:

i'm all about cute ;)

Juwee says:

i've noticed ;)

09:33 Sep 05 2007
Times Read: 896

It makes me sad when VR says I have no friends =(

Who is this Drakontion chick anyways?
18:14 Sep 04 2007
Times Read: 903

Meh.
21:54 Sep 03 2007
Times Read: 906

People annoy me.



You're happily conversing for a while, then all of a sudden... nothing. No hello's when you come online, no responses when you message them, and worst of all is when they log off when you log on.



Well fuck you too. If you don't want to talk to me, just say so. I have enough self esteem issues without your adding to them.



*takes black marker pen and crosses names out*

I wish I knew what this meant
13:26 Sep 03 2007
Times Read: 911


2/09/2007 2:27:33 AM cloud Juwee your day babygirl

2/09/2007 2:27:46 AM Juwee cloud my day? empty without you ;)

2/09/2007 2:28:17 AM cloud Juwee awww

2/09/2007 2:28:18 AM cloud Juwee hunniiyyy

2/09/2007 2:28:23 AM cloud Juwee *kisses*

2/09/2007 2:28:32 AM Juwee cloud awwww *kisses back* ^^

2/09/2007 2:30:07 AM cloud Juwee i can't compete with your online flirts though :(

2/09/2007 2:30:25 AM Juwee cloud what do you mean hun?

2/09/2007 2:32:12 AM cloud Juwee you have other people online don't you?

2/09/2007 2:32:28 AM Juwee cloud ah... well yeah

2/09/2007 2:32:51 AM cloud Juwee ohhh

2/09/2007 2:33:23 AM Juwee cloud is that bad?

2/09/2007 2:34:13 AM cloud Juwee no i just feel like i'm not your #1 priority that's all

2/09/2007 2:34:32 AM Juwee cloud do you want to be?

2/09/2007 2:34:41 AM cloud Juwee no

2/09/2007 2:34:43 AM cloud Juwee too much pressure

2/09/2007 2:34:53 AM cloud Juwee at least before we meet anyhow :D

2/09/2007 2:34:58 AM cloud Juwee i don't want to be a let down :(

2/09/2007 2:35:03 AM Juwee cloud aw hunny

1/09/2007 2:35:15 AM Juwee cloud you're not - lol i am =P

2/09/2007 2:35:28 AM cloud Juwee baahh

2/09/2007 2:35:28 AM cloud Juwee sily

08:31 Sep 01 2007
Times Read: 913

Suffer Well

Where were you

when I fell from grace?


A frozen heart an empty space

Something's

changed and it's in your eyes


Please don't speak you'll only lie





I found treasure not where I thought


Peace of mind can't be bought


Still I believe





Just hang on


Suffer well


Sometimes it's hard


It's hard to tell





An angel led me when I was blind


I said take me back I've changed my mind


Now I believe

From the

blackest room I was torn


You called my name my love was born


So I believe





Just hang on


Suffer well


Sometimes it's hard


It's hard to tell