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Well nothing really to say today.. Just another one of those days of work and getting of later than expected and told i was going to get off. Of course my dumbass room mate was thinking he was big shit again today and i had to stop someone else from beating his ass. again. I dont know what the hell is with him lately. But other then that. Its been normal. People being mad at me and i have no idea why. But thats cool. More then likely its better for them to stop talking to me anyways. I dont know. I have alot of friends anyways and i have someone wanting to be in my life anyways and i guess I should stop fighting it and let her in. After i take care of something first. But after i do she will be there in my life. But yeah.People who get mad and not tell someone why they are mad at them . I really dont see that as a friend. Just someone that wont except help. But if they tell them why they are mad. Then maybe they can fix it. Now thats a real friend.



Well laters for now.

WSell To start off. I do have feelings and emotins. Even though some people dont think i do. Well. I am actually a very caring person and love someone very much. I actually love 2 people very much but one of them i love like a sister and she knows who she is. But this other person I feel like i have known forever and I just cant stop thinking of her no matter what i do. Yet she is going through a hard time and i am trying to help her through it. I know swhe wants my help but for some reason she tells me she doesnt. I dont know what to do but she knows how i feel bout her and yet i dont know how she feels bout me. If only there was another way for me to help her i would do it. If only she could tell me.

Ometimes I just dont get how I try to help people and give them advicwe and they just wont listen to it. Like one of my friends on here. She says her family ignores her and wont pay her any attention. I tell her she needs to talk to them but she wont. I just dont get it anymore. She wants to be happy but she wont let people mtry to help her and she wont listen to anyones advice. im bout to give up on helping others and go back to my silent self again. Back to the way i was in middle and high school. Just not talking to anyone at all. Just talk to only people that will listen to me. And let me help them. I know I am a stubborn person. Ill admit that. But i let people help me in the past and with out there help AND advice. more than likely i would not be here today. Got my friends on here that help me when life gets tough and unbarrable. Thats what some people need to relize. Is that they have friends everywhere that are willing to help them. I think i may be just too caring of a person. well thats all for now.



LATERS

Well for toniotre there shouldnt be too many.





For the first, this is a boring ass 4 day weekend for me. Nothing to do, no money and of course my room mate ate all the food i had bought for this weekend and i ran outta beer. No one to spend time with and working on paper work to get rid of some stuff. Damn. Maybe i should also write another journal off of here so i can keep some thoughts to myself. Even though sooner or later they would end up on here anyways. LOL!!!!!



I look at it this way. The sooner im outta the military the better cause then i wont have to deal with all this shit that i have to deal with everyday. Like for instance. There where people going around the barreacks this morning checking rooms for something i guess. Well, I guess they thought that everyone was gone. Big mistake. So they just walk up into my room. I sleep with a knife right next to my bed. They opened my door and started looking around. I woke up and grabbed my knife and started going off on them. They lookede like they had seen a ghost and went running outta the room. The went to get a sergent and came back. The sergent try to yell at me. But i told him that they just walked into my room with out knocking and yet he still yelled at me. Then i reminded him whats been happening in the barreacks the past couple weeks and he calmed down and told the guys they need to start knocking and not just walking in.





Well that lasted longer than i thought.



But thats it for now.



LATERS!!!!!

THOUGHT 1== My room mate is the biggest dumb as and laziest fuck on the face of the planet. First of all. He is too damn lazy to get internet in his own room so he has to share mine. So i made a small deal with him. He misses one payment, or actually half of one and i cut the wires leading to his room. He agreed. @nd. When ever I am here on the weekends making sure everything is clean for the next week for the weekly room inspection, he is at home with his fiancee which he has cheated on and yet she knows and stays with him. Dumb ass. So yeah i get all the cleaning done on my own. But not in his room. Fuck that. 3rd. When ever ever one that was left behind when everyone else in my unit went to Iraq is working. He just stands around looking like a retarded fuck and not do shit. Which then i have to yell at him and yet he doesnt listen cause he says i never work and yet i have to take 3 showers a day cause of how sweaty i get morning after work and before bed. 4th. Then the mother fucker has the nerve to eat my food, says he is going to buy morte before he goes home for the weekend and doesnt do it. Bukkshit. Thats all for that.



THOUGHT 2===



Well, my Christmas leave is coming up next month and damn i cant wait. Going to spend a week at home and then hopefully another at my sis grandmas house if its copol with her grandma that is. Im pretty sure it will be. Well at least hopefully. But to tell you the truth, Im kinda nervous to go home again cause i never know whats going to happen when i get there. And I hate leaving cause I never know when im going to come back or if im going to come back and see everyone again. I still got alot of people to visit and sadly my family in Chicago is going to have to wait again. Cause with issues that are happening in my life which i choose not to mention for reasonms beyond me. I am not going to have the money to do so. So they will have to wake again.



Thats it for now but im sure im going to be in here in the next couple of days to add somethinbg else. See yall on the flip side.



LATERS!!!!!

Damn! What is this world coming to. First there is a shooting on a military base that kills 13 and injures 30 and now a shooting in a different city in some high rise building somewhere killing 1 and i think wounding 8 people. What is our country coming too. All i know is the first shooter was stopped and the second was found at his moms house and arrested. Wow. This world is starting to be really fucked up.





Laters!

Yeah. Went to an appointment and found out I actually had brain tramua. Maybe that explains why I have been acting the way I am. If i have hurt anyone In the past year and am sorry beyond the most one can be sorry. No wander I havent been feeling like myself lately. And to think Iraq caused this. Their not sure how long i have had it but they say that is one reason my optic nerve is damage and how i am LEGALLY BLIND in my right eye now. But i still have to go and get my MRI done at the hospital on Wendsday. Hopefully that have something else to tell me other than what i already know. And once again I am sorry. Truely sorry if I have hurt anyone in the past year.



Have a good day/night.