So I went to get my plates for my car today... only to find out that yet again I was not told ALL the information I needed when I first went to the government office. Now I get to goto customs... oh goodie goodie... meh.
Hopefully soon this can be finished, I am so over the entire process and immigration that I want to scream. Seriously perhaps it is too much work and not enough play- but my irritation over all of this is at an all time high. Zero to bitch I call it. And I hate it when I'm like this.
Currently we have a wicked thunderstorm happening, so I think I will take a bath and then nap. Heh, bathing in a thunder storm *snicker* what can I say? I like to walk on the wild side!
I read a journal a friend wrote about accomplishments that we have in our life, and how they thought they did not have any. Funny thing is, I have many in my life and those that know me know I have some of them. I don’t talk about them all because frankly it’s a bit embarrassing. That said, I think they are all for shit.
Yes I am proud I have done them, but not for the end result. Because I TRIED, I put my all into something or what at the time I thought was my all. Still let me tell you of a man who had none, or would say he had none.
This man was born in Chicago 1903 premature by several weeks; his parents were immigrants from other countries and had chosen to live on a farm. Because he and his sister were born so early they were put into a chicken incubator because in those days you didn’t go to the hospital to have a baby, you did it at home. His sister died several days after they were born.
From there his family had another boy and then adopted a little girl to complete their family. His brother grew up and went to university, and his sister went on to have the most amazing adventures and life. In comparison his achievements didn’t count for much. At the age of 10 he had a kidney die inside of him. The doctors did not find it until he was almost 40, so everyone assumed him to just be sickly. He had flat feet, so he was not accepted into the army and he did not “mess” around as he cared for his mother until she died. People did not think that he would ever marry, and he resented not going to school. So he read, everything and anything he could get his hands on.
Eventually he married a nurse, a woman who was content on her own and willing to do what others were afraid of. Together they had one child, and from there they saved and bought their first house. Let’s jump ahead several years to when their daughter had a child out of wedlock, and let’s remember this was not an ok thing to do.
How did he react? He poured so much love on that child that the child’s first word was his name. He read to her daily, taught her how to ride a bike and how to fix the kitchen sink. Instead of yelling he would use a rubber band in his pocket and snap her when she acted out.
When she grew up an went to university, he couldn’t have been more proud because he had been told his entire life that his intelligence was not great. It was his brother’s book smarts and bearing that gave him this impression. Still he maintained his humble stance and would help strangers and was active in his community. He enjoyed some local fame as one of the oldest bike riders in the community. He maintained eating and living right to maintain his health and to the day he died only took a “baby” aspirin a day.
When he died, a couple wrote the family that had been touched by his kindness. They had only met him once eighteen years prior. Here the words just do not give enough to the amazing life he lived. Outside of the norms society tried to implement and always with love and compassion. If you had asked him what his accomplishments were he would say none.
To me they were:
Love
Compassion
Learning
Caring
Integrity
Honor
And most importantly, nothing I have done would have been done without his influence and utter belief that I could and can do anything I set my mind to.
So when asked about your accomplishments do not look to others and the world. Look at your home, your family and see how your love and undying defence of them makes this world a better place, and allows them to reach beyond boundaries they would have otherwise lived by.
There are no greater accomplishments in this world truly.
You know you're ready for the weekend when it's noon on Friday and you've already been late to three appointments, missed a message and still have several appointments to go.
At least I have gotten my driver's license taken care of- Tomorrow I'm off to get new plates. Cross your fingers that the plates I want are available. *whew*
Are you tired? I know I am! :)
Why is it government offices are such a pain your arse? OMG I went about 3 weeks ago to find out what I need and expected to have to make two trips. They told me, I got all the information and then- Oh SORRY we can't unless you have your passport and/or birth certificate.
Adding insult to injury I could NOT find the hours of operation for the location on the web site. I am NOT stupid but boy being talked down to because I can't figure out WHERE they hid the information really irks me =/
*le sigh*
I will get over this, honestly I will... It just irritates me when I tried SO very hard to have it done today.
Wow, with how busy life's been- I have a hard time believing how quickly time has flown.
It was just 2 years ago that Heidi asked me to be an assistant in Eternal- actually it will be 2 years in a day or so, because I was at our family beach house when she took over Eternal.
Contrary to what many people may think they know, Heidi and I had talked at that point- but not in great depth. After she asked me to assist, I have to say life changed. That she asked me totally surprised me- typcially people just choose friends, not someone they have only had a handful of conversations with. I also found someone not only very similar to myself, but different to the extent that we get where the other is comming from. We've heard each others good and bad times, still nothing seems to get us away from the understanding that agreeing to disagree is sometimes the coolest thing there is.
From that day, I don't remember if it was slow or fast how we basically progressed to chatting every day. It's to the point now that I seriously wonder if somethings wrong if I don't hear from her. There is more I could say, but I just can't bring myself to share because to me, they mean too much and I'm selfish enough to want to keep a monopoly on her time :P
What can I say? Thank you, not because you've given me a place to work with you- but because you've become such an amazing friend. Rock on- August can't come soon enough! Happy 2 years Heidi :)
I have so much going through my mind these days it all seems to just jumble into this ball of "what next". Work as I have stated several times is going well, I'm currently working on several articles that I will submit to local publications, and candles... they are not forgotten!
Big things folks. In such a way that I seem to walk around overwhelmed. Now this is not me saying "I don't deserve" or "I didn't work hard enough" but when you have worked so very hard, for such a long time...
Seeing what you visioned happening, is like watching a movie. You think, "no this can't be me," or "wow, how could this happen?"
Still another part of me looks and says "more is needed." I do not want to be ungrateful, for I am very much so. Yet my practical side has to speak up an remind me of what I need to be doing.
Now that my Vaction is just 2 weeks away I'm getting petrified when I stop to think of what needs doing. I'm still taking time for me, going to bed early and exercising (helps that I get paid for the latter). Yet I wonder what will I not finish to goto Seattle. I know I need the break from here, but I just can't help but worry with what I need to do how this will work out.
By Thursday my car should have Ontario plates, that small transfer to make the move "official" is costing me over 1,000. Meh, saftey check and an American car do not mix. Good news is the emissions test was well below and in standard. Thank goodness for small miricles.
Last few days people have been calling to book appointments becuase I'm gone for most of June. I have a gut feeling when I send my email to all my clients today or tomorrow that will increase greatly. In truth perhaps that is part of the not wanting to go. If something happens there is no one to treat them, and I hate that. Not that I am the end all be all of Acupuncture- it's just when you create a patient practioner relationship, you find it hard to just not be there if needed.
Yes the break is needed all the more because of this, my boundaries are blurring. I can see how Dr's work till they are sick- and I supose that is one of the other reasons I never followed science. I over focus and then do not take care of myself.
Ownership, Heidi has said it time and again... still how many of us take ownership with our sucesses and failures? I am finding owning up to failure easier and looking at my success as something that if I don't kill myself over I will loose.
I need to remember my own advise. Breathe. Feel your body relax and forget what needs doing for the moment. Once you feel nothing take one last breath before you jump back into your day...
It is time for a serious bubble bath.
Here is the nitty gritty...
Thursday, July 31, 2008
Depart: 3:12pm
afternoon Detroit, MI
Detroit Wayne County (DTW)
Arrive: 4:46pm
afternoon New Orleans, LA
New Orleans Louis Armstrong Int'l (MSY)
Return
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
Depart: 4:46pm
afternoon New Orleans, LA
New Orleans Louis Armstrong Int'l (MSY)
Arrive: 8:31pm
evening Detroit, MI
Detroit Wayne County (DTW)
Your flight is confirmed. The airline is assigning seats at check-in.
Can we say: EXCITED?! :D
Heidi put the worst "health" drinks in her journal, but many people do not know that the fast food chains MUST have nutritional information on their web sites.
I just went to Dairy Queen and the SMALL Butterfinger Blizzard is:
From Dairy Queen:
Small butterfinger blizzard
Calories 490
Calories from Fat 160
Total Fat 17g
Saturated Fat11g
Trans Fat0g
Cholesterol 35mg
Sodium 240mg
Total Carbohydrate 76g
Dietary Fiber 1g
Sugars 60g
Protein 10g
Something I always tell those that want to loose weight, start reading labels. Read about what you eat, and don't just turn a blind eye and assume the food you are eating is good because it tastes good.
I’m feeling this right now. I have cut out 2 skirts and one dress, all while doing my laundry and catching up with 2 friends. Funny how one day off gives us a little more “me time”.
One of the dresses I’m cutting out is over 6 years in the “dreaming”. I always knew it would be a great dress for me, a little retro and a bit of summer. It will be a 40’s inspired dress made out of 100% cotton iridescent fabric. The colour of the cotton is orange with yellow and pink iridescent. I also found a yellow and gold cotton brocade when I bought the pattern. Funny thing is every time I went to make the dress, it did seem like the right timing. Now with New Orleans, I’m realizing several of my fabric “hordes” are perfect for making the clothes I’ve wanted to have for years, just have not made.
See with my body type it is far easier for me to make my clothes than to buy them. Typically to buy something that fits, I have to spend several hundred dollars, and to make the same item- typically it is only $30-70 dollars. Plus it fits me better than what is in the stores.
While cutting and laying out I was talking to muh biddy and dealing with a bias cut which can be tricky. I was asking her why some of our friends are friends with a person that is very manipulative and down right mean. She simply said, “they are probably waiting for the person they first got to know to come out again.” Too many times we all forget because of a change in our life, where we were. It is easy to not remember what we struggled with and treat others poorly because we can.
Just with cutting out a dress, the seamstress must be careful how the pattern is laid out, because to cut too fast you typically ruin the idea you originally had. Anything is saveable, if you are creative, but you can’t repair a cut you made in haste.
Too bad more people don’t take the time to be who they are, and keep their space while still maintaining a respect of the other.
Who wants to join in while in New Orleans? Let me know, I'll bring the supplies! Just don't complain when I wake yer butt outta bed at 9 am!
Tired.
I don't think I can stay up another minute. Still there is much I would say and do, although I long for rest.
Torn.
Wishing there were some way to bridge the gaps of dissapointment and pain. One moment is gone and the memory shreds my personality.
Either my day was longer than I thought, or there is a complete lack of understanding happening here...
May 15 2008 (-0 GMT) XXXX wrote:
Correction,the information I posted on the forum xxxx was NOT a copy/paste and was NOT taken from said site you placed up.
I have studied and learned such information from my school where I have earned the title of high priestess, so please ask before you decide to close a thread, to have full knowledge.
Thank you,
XXXX
Message To: XXXX
It is word for word from that site, go to the 6th paragraph down. Considering the article was written in 2002, unless you can prove you are the author it is a plagiarism. Do not tell me I am incorrect when the mistake is YOURS for not posting your sources.
On 02:29:24 May 15 2008 (-0 GMT) XXXX wrote:
So you know,I went to school at Isis Moon Temple and that is where I learned my information from,so again,I ask that you speak with someone before you assume where something came from.
Thanks,
XXXX
Message To: XXXX
It is WORD FOR WORD. That is by definition PLAGERISM, and it is NOT allowed in the forums. Had you given your sources for the information it would have been allowed.
You can wave all the education you wish, your ignorance of the word plagiarism is showing your lack of understanding. Bottom line is this, I don't care about your education, the exact paragraph you opened your thread with is STOLEN from that site.
The burden of proof lies on you to prove they stole your work, and not vice versa.
On 02:38:40 May 15 2008 (-0 GMT)XXXX wrote:
You do not have to be rude,I have not treated you in any bad manner and have spoken calm and nice to you,no need to be hasty.
You want PROOF then visit www.isismoontemple.com
Then see for yourself I did not steal anything from such said site you mentioned.
I know where I learned my info,maybe said site you mentioned and other sites carry the same info but I do not "steal" from others as you have seem to accuse me of.
Now I have said all I needed to say,good night to you.
XXXX
Message To: XXXX
How have I been rude? I have been trying to emphasize what plagiarism is. The point remains, it is not your page that Google brings up when you cut and past that paragraph- it is the article I linked to. Your page links to yahoo groups, where you may have been introduced to it from the same source I linked.
Your site does not show any "proof" of where you got the information, nor does it make it "OK" that you did not give the source of your information. Just like in school, if you quote or use information from another source you must give a clear link to where the information is from/can be found. Otherwise it is considered plagiarism.
So it's been a hard day to say the least. One that is touched by death, sorrow and pain.
It's also one that has given me enough time to go through my Fav. Journals and really read them for the first time in a while.
I just found this in Meeper's journal:
It isn't about nonconforming or choosing to swim up stream; apathy is a tough skill to master for someone who actual gives a damn. It would be great to not feel obligated to rock the boat, to look away, or to believe that we cannot bring about change- but we can. You can. You can pretend that you are not meant for the heroine role. Everyone at one point in their life idolizes and then deems the feats of the giants are unrealistic for a peon. But we both know that is untrue. Write your own fairytale and live it because every story needs a hero that fights when everyone else gives up. Injustices happen because good people do nothing. At the end of the day the only person who you have to answer to is you and God.
All I can say is thank you. Those words are the push I needed to step forward from the pain.
Namaste.
It's so very hard to hear that something is not going well for a client. When you put you all into assisting, and it just isn't enough.
While there are aspects we control, I am constantly reminded of the fragile beings we are. It humbles me, still a part of me only wants to work harder to hopefully prevent this from happening again.
Life is a gift, what we do with it is what creates the beauty around us.
I just found out that the homeless youth clinic I used to work at has lost all of it's volunteers. I'm hoping that we can get my credentials back in time for me to be there the days that I'm in Seattle.
Since my school closed, most of the community has not had the means to help out with the volunteer aspects. I understand, it's hard to give your time when you are constantly uncertain of if you are going to make it to the next pay check, or you are working 2 or 3 jobs to support yourself in your career.
And I know that homeless youth are not exactly easy to treat. Still I was hoping that, well I don't know what. Just hearing that there is only my teacher there, was a little heart breaking.
Haunts my thoughts, unconscious of the meaning- I seek to dream more than to feel. It is the thoughts that are leaking from my subconscious that concern me.
All I can do is hum myself to sleep with the line:
By the prick of my thumb, something wicked this way comes
More change and I just don't know if I have the energy or the desire to put up with much more. Days like this, I think of running into the mountains never to be known except by those I choose to visit.
Taken from my profile, where in truth you find the essence of me. I do get much humour from those who claim to not understand or leave comments like, "cool, but I want to know more about you". If you really want to know the words are there.
This one is for me, a reminder of what I already know:
I have a knack for making things happen. I do this even when it compromises my own happiness or perception of such. No I’m not a martyr. But I seem to just know when something is or is not meant to be, especially when emotions are involved.
To that extent I will often push, help out the fates so it would seem. Funny that fate rarely seems to assist me in these matters of the heart. Where I get my assistance from fate is in my material needs and those I am trying to rid myself of. I tend to be the stroke of luck that someone needs to their path to finding someone. Time and time again, I build someone up emotionally only to have to let them go. Irony is while they are what I want at the time, they themselves do not typically help me.
They break me.
I am a little excited and nervous about this summer.
It starts out with a trip to Seattle. I would say home, but truthfully I dread leaving where I am now. To say that I have exactly what I want is an exaggeration, but I am very content with where life is right now. My work is going well, and aside from having to finish immigration- I finally feel as if my feet are getting firmly planted under me.
What I dread is closing the book. This trip my brother will come up from Portland to help me with the preparations on my house so that it can FINALLY be rented. Between he and I, it should be about 10-12 days. Good thing I'm there 15 days, and if we really get a move on- it could be as little as 7 days. I also will be painting my friend's windows. She has a beautifully restored craftsman home that is light butter yellow with cranberry and white trim. My target: make the trim glow with beauty.
I look forward to the detail work and have her on my schedule for the early am and pm. With my main colour being cranberry, I have to finish prior to the heat of the day. Hopefully it does not rain. Or it will be a really crapy as she paid for my ticket just so I can do her trim. For those of you that have not paid painters, it can cost up to 1,000 for the trim detail she wants. I am "cheap" at 420.00 for a ticket, plus I LOVE this kind of work.
Nervous is an understatement. Not about the trip, but about my work. I have not had a real vacation since 2003 when I graduated from school. I'm a little freaky about what is going to happen... will my leaving ruin the wonderful thing I have? Self-doubt and fear are a constant thing for me right now.
No, I am not panicking, but the underlining thought is: "it can go as fast as it came." I have gotten too used to just getting by that the turn into making a living is still "shocking". Not because I didn't know I could, but in some ways I have held to the idea of "selling out" which in theatre meant doing shows you did not like, just to make ends meat.
Reality check time, we all have to do things we don't like to make ends meat. And while we can grumble and complain, it is far more productive to accept and learn. I think I'm doing less of the former and more of the latter. That is my true intent with all of this.
True independence.
I love the thought that I am slowly inching my way there. Yesterday I also put into motion my first steps to correct the financial mess I created with my move. I have to say it feels very good to be walking forward... still I feel that I have to guard myself or I'll loose my nuts. Damn the squirrels of VR, as that image is one I often see of myself as squirrel gathering nuts. :P
Best part is that what I did yesterday also will be my ticket to New Orleans. I should have that finalized in the next two weeks. I can't express how ecstatic I am to go somewhere with NO CREW, NO JOB, and well have it just be for me. It has been too long in the waiting for this!
Two weeks ago I bought my fabric for my dress, and now I'm getting ready to design and cut it out... *omg gasp* because I haven't done "fun" clothes in over 10 years. I've had to be too practical. And the best part?! My dress will be 100% cotton, AND GLOWS in the DARK :D
It's the silliness I've missed of me. Slowly the youth and the adult are creating their peace, so that I can be wholly me. Not fractions that I have to show. Part of this is my reconnecting to my friends from youth. Those of you that have me on Facebook have seen a number of people that I have held in secret in my past, that mean worlds to me. They nurtured my vengeful youth, into a caring adult. I would not be the person I am without them, or the Salvation Army. So never doubt the importance of Spirit, it is infectious and only helps us become more... even if for a while it must be dormant.
Simply thought about, I am in awe of my life. I feel cursed, blessed and lucky all at the same time. The truth is, I would not be here without every step I have taken, so I cherish them. One day perhaps I will truly share them, but for now I gather the "goods" and store them for me, for my reserves if something goes wrong. But they are accounted for and slowly I feel as if I return to the true path. Namaste.
Your Status: Sire (Level 28)
You have completed 100% of this level.
Pages Viewed Score: 29 x .30 = 8.7
Time Spent Score: 29 x .50 = 14.5
Ratings Score: 19 x .10 = 1.9
Posts Score: 31 x .10 = 3.1
Score: 28.2
Referral Points: 4
Referral Modifier: 1
Mark Bonus: 15%
Mark Modifier: 1.15
Total Score: 28.2
Ratings Score: 19 ( 4687 of 13676 or 34.27% )
Gee, it's not obvious what I don't do when online is it?!
CountessMoon is a douchebag Bitch!
Why you ask?! Here are the facts...
She made me laugh, so hard... that I was snorting...
AND
Because Wasabi & Honey chips BURN like a mofo when you snort from laughter
33% Dixie. You are definitely a Yankee.
29% Dixie. You are a dandy Yankee Doodle.
HAHAHAHAHA funny thing is- up here, all the USA are considered Yanks *SO THERE* :P
For those that are into the Woetry our dear SockTroll loves to spout, here is a fairy tale:
Way back in the time before societies lived a VR SockTroll; Miz was the name our Troll used around the forums. His favourite joy was to be contrary and gnash his teeth around those he viewed as the powerful, to protect the village idiots. A few months later our Troll deleted in a scandal with the big bad LuciousWolf, that he lead others to believe had him banned.
He was not.
He then returned like a good Troll, for he missed antagonizing the Dominars and challenging the thoughts of lesser beings. At this point the Prince anointed some new people into the Administration, who did not know the whole story of our resident SockTroll's journey- they thought him to be banished from the land. So they did their duty and deleted the Troll.
However a friend of said Troll got tired of having to replace her friends list, so she made it known that even though distasteful and rude at times, our Troll was still welcome. In speaking up for the SockTroll she was named to be his Champion.
Now that the Troll has offended others, and she has yet again stepped up to defend the Troll from what would be certain erasure. Because the stench he has left around leads some to believe there to be a sewer leak.
No, he just found George and Fred's dung bombs and stinkers. One must also never forget that a Troll feeds on rumours, and never shares what he says in private. To do so would be in very poor taste, because how would the masses truly react to a SockTroll with heart? For him that would be worse than deletion, it would be the end of VR NeverNever Land.
On your high horse dear sock? This is a "rich" entry considering you yourself have left nothing but vulgar comments in my own journal.
Keep on defending the meek and mild the ones you know would cut your heart out in front of you if they could see you truly. Your sympathy comes not from the depths of your emotion, but the depths of your distain.
Consider your words wisely for I am watching, and I know you know that I see you very clearly.
** For the rest of the Drama seekers **
We all have our thoughts on what happens in this two-dimensional place. Do not be so delusional to think your view is the only valid one. Just as a coin has two sides, so does this. I have seen both clearly and held the coin that is reason enough to post this.
*and yes I corrected a few typos
I am waiting to marry my own personal superhero.
Not the hero, but the super part of someone willing to take their own stand in their life.
That is what makes the mask special- the reasons behind it.
So I wait.
Still we are only players in the play- that someone forgot to give the script out to, and the costumes were too expensive, we can't afford lights so we deal with the sun...
Only to find the absurdity is one piece of a larger canvas called life.
Dream on dreamers, I hope when they shatter you find what you are made of and not more illusions.
For the dream even when achieved is not quite how you dreamed it. There are fewer sparkles and less colours, but the realness of it is amazing.
It is the grit that makes it worth the journey, for the tools increase and the changes forced by weather will leave you in awe.
Why do I bother?
Seriously, I have better boundaries than this. Perhaps I have tried to this extent because I did see something different.
Tis ok, I have pleanty of other things to do.
Meeper's avatar keeps reminding me of what people used to/still tease me about: rocking the boat.
Funny thing is, some of us want to be balanced and not in extremes- but there is something about me as a person that just can't seem to let things lie where they fall. For some reason when I was young, people put many expectations on me, and from there I've put more... only the ones they assigned to me- I purposefuly either destroyed or changed.
I just can't do something just cause other people think it's the right thing... there are times it is exhausting being this type of person... never truly "getting" the social norms and why people think the way they do... and today I really want to sleep in with a fairy tale.
=/
Seriously, sometimes I wonder if everyone here truly lives like a bull in a china cabinet.
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