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CrackInTheWall's Journal


CrackInTheWall's Journal

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10 entries this month
 

Owie owie owie!!!!

00:21 Feb 27 2006
Times Read: 1,025


OUCH! That's all I have to say after giving my eyebrow ring a rest for the past week...



That #%^$#&$%#$*&^@#^%$! piece of metal is SOOO TINY that it took me over 3 days to finaly have to quardination to put it back in *grumbles* .



On one hand I love that it's so small, on the other - I never want to take it out again!



=/


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YAY MORE SNOW!

16:30 Feb 24 2006
Times Read: 1,029


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Heh heh, not that much snow- but it has been chaotic this am because of it. See last night we had a big storm (actually it woke me) and it snowed first, then rained turning previous snow to ice, then it snowed for our final blanket of white.



Being that Seattlites can't drive in rain let alone snow- and this is primarily ice with a pretty covering... I am SO glad I don't have to be at work till 10am. By then the hazards will have done one of three things.



1. Melted

2. Called in to work so they won't go

3. Gotten to work.



Meanwhile, I'm drinking my coffee enjoying the nip to the air enjoying something I have missed!

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EEEK!!!

00:05 Feb 22 2006
Times Read: 1,037


65 Days from when the final phase of moving occurs.





Too much to do... and after today only 64 days =/


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HEARTSICK

22:51 Feb 21 2006
Times Read: 1,041


That’s the only word that describes my emotion right now. Everything is going as planned for the move- all is falling into place, except my animals.



I have no idea what I am going to do. I have a place to stay till I get settled, I have opportunity. But I don’t have a place for my 2 dogs and 2 cats in this transition. I have even gotten to the point of considering finding a new home for one of my kitties.



I HAVE NEVER given up an animal before… and it’s breaking my heart to think that I have to. In one instance it is very SELFISH of me, as this one kitty has not been a perfect match for my home (my female kitty does not like, but tolerate him) and he is so affectionate. A part of me just wants to scream MINE MINE MINE… and not look at what is really best.



My animals have all been together for over 6 years… and this one guy is not going to do well with the move, I already know it. The rest of them LOVE to travel and each other, so they would not do well being separated. I just don’t want tear up my “family” even though everything is pointing that it is the best thing to do. I want to just cry.


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YAY I amuse :D

01:21 Feb 17 2006
Times Read: 1,055


You know, I usually have that kind of answer especially when writing. “I'm fine how are you.... how is your day...” because I don't want to expose myself to whomever it is I am talking to.



For some reason with me my words seem to be a direct link to me. Not the me that most people know, but the subconscious me who is more and more replacing the me I had created.



I find that my natural state is far more agreeable and kind than I have made myself to be. The more I see the fallacy of what society deems a worthy person, the more I will just be me.



There is enough hate and greed to surpass any accomplishment that I could ever do. So why not just do what pleases the core of me and allows for the chance that beauty may occur and touch someone else in that special way that I have felt. Then if nothing else, that special moment will hopefully ripple on.


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YAY Snow!!

00:51 Feb 15 2006
Times Read: 1,083


HEY LOOK! Seattle's Valentine's Snow.



Heh heh... SOOOO pathetic! But it's white, so it counts!

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Image hosting by Photobucket

Notice the doggies in the window? Poor babies had to stay at home! And yes I need to mow :P


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Careful what you ask in Messages to me... I just may~

05:20 Feb 13 2006
Times Read: 1,086


I have been well. I have been finishing my time at home in pursuit of a new home... it seems that my time here is drawing to a close and I am a ghost in my own city.



It is a strange feeling. Yet liberating at the same time. I am free to observe and see who I really am and what I have feared. I feel as if I have been given a gift- a do over if you would.



Now I will truly be free to be me, and create the life that duty kept me from. So it is a wonder that the tears well and hold- in all that I will gain, I still will miss all those who have loved and supported me here. I pray that this is not a goodbye just a brief interlude to act 2.



lol careful with me, if you ask how I am, I may end up writing a journal entery back ;)


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LOL Damn, it's true!

03:12 Feb 11 2006
Times Read: 1,090




Sahahria --


[noun]:

A person who laughs at anything (even this entry)





'How will you be defined in the dictionary?' at QuizGalaxy.com


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One of them days :/

04:35 Feb 06 2006
Times Read: 1,096


Ever have an ok day. Then suddenly one thing goes off... and you find you are in a funk. Not because you feel sad, but because you're emotional?



I don't usually get this way and am feeling so alone and damn it, girly. Grrrr I think it's time to watch shit get blown up, since I don't want to organize or pack tonight.



That or a good book, fire and someone to share chai with would help. Yep, definately time to watch shit get blown up.



:/


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Confessions of a stalker….

21:26 Feb 03 2006
Times Read: 1,107


I just read Cancer’s journal about internet dating fraud, and went to his acrimony article.



Oh My God- I’m a FRAUD! Ha ha ha ha ha ha.



While I understand that there are those who prey on the lonely, I am astounded by how much I sounded like a sniveling “girl” AH- Shoot me!! I am moving to an area that I think there is a cute boy in- I do miss talking with him when my schedule and his don’t match. I am very interested in the possibilities once we have met – we’ll see once we meet what the verdict REALLY is.



But am I moving for HIM? Let me see:



1. The area is a growing area for my profession as the current estimate for my job is one person for every 30,000 in the populace. Currently in Seattle that number by over guessing population and UNDER guessing how many others are here is one practioner for every 500 in the populace.

2. I currently work with the US National team here in Seattle. The Canadian National team is in that town, and the US coach knows the Canadian coach- and is willing to write me a letter of introduction.

3. Housing in my neighborhood is now between $500,000- $950,000, my taxes this next year are estimated to go to 6,000. The area I’m looking at houses start at 75,000 Canadian- 250,000 if I wanted REALLY upscale… what I’m looking for is typically in the 125,000-150,000 Canadian! Taxes between 1,000-3000 Canadian.

4. Heating changes… currently looks to be about $100 more per month (again Canadian dollars) but I have one word: SNOW. YAY!!!! Seattle is grey from November to April- meh.

5. I now have a company in Canada that is eager to discuss with me my making Spa products for them, as they currently have to import them. I have been running my own business (granted very small) since 99 doing exactly this.

6. I have never lived out side of Seattle, with the exception of university. I only returned due to family obligations as 10 years ago I had planed on New York.

7. One of my 3 best friends lives in Toronto, my oldest friend visits there often, and my other is looking at Calgary (I’m pestering them, they might come to Ontario too!). I’ll get to see them all more.

8. I have extended family by Niagara Falls- they seem to be excited about my being in the area- although they still don’t know how I’ll deal with snow. LOL.



It seems that to me, the idea of “Cute Boy” is more the icing on the cake- the final bit of what I needed to start going for WHAT I WANT. Which to start is to identify myself away from my home, and be somewhere I can make a living at what I want to do.



Will I stay? Crap- who knows shit when it come to the future, but I’m excited for the adventure.

Finally- I pay my own way- don’t know how, but I will manage. I don’t need to be saved (not yet at least- once I move, might be saying something else)!



And I’ll continue to stalk Cute Boy- as long as he’s ok with that!


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