The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

I have been rather busy this week and consumed by work. That is the reason i have not put much work into my profile or journal lately. I promise to those that are closely watching me, I will update everything as time allows.

One new piece of information i would like to share before i skulk off is my aquisition of internet service. Until now i have been relying on wireless connections at the local coffee shop but this afternoon i sealed the deal and am now paying 60 dollars a month for 4G mobile access for my laptop. Now i can be online anywhere anytime.

I am sitting here at 10 o clock in the morning watching my kids play at the Mcdonald's play area after breakfast. I am thinking to myself why and i still awake after working a graveyard shift that proved to be very challenging. The answer to this question is my kids wanted to see me and their mother wanted me to watch them while she did some grocery shopping.

I know i should be sleeping because my day is going to start at 4 pm. I cannot, for some reason say no to my ex when she asks for things even though it was her that tossed me out on the streets, but that is a story for another time. One I am still trying to decide if i want to tell.

I know that I haven't writing too regularly and wonder why i am even keeping this journal, other than it gives me a place to vent about my life. This past weekend has been quite hard for me. Nothing out of the ordinary happened, but I did hang out with my kids at the park which left me feeling quite drained. I have not found a suitable way to replace the energy lost so at the moment i feel as though i am floating through life.

I am working more overtime this week, so will probably not have much time to work on my profile or write in here. My hopes are that after this week i will be set with everything and can take some much needed time off to relax and re-energize myself. I am working on changing both my internet and cell phone providers so that i can connect online from anywhere. There is a new service called clear that used a plug-in usb modem which will grant me access to the online world from virtually anywhere. Here's hoping.

Today is another day that starts much the same as all the others. I am currently sitting here in a local coffee shop waiting to go to work. I am in high spirits because the problems that i thought i had (which i mentions in my last entry) were not as bad as they seemed. While i did unintentionally upset her, this lady whom i am greatly interested in does not stay mad at me for long. We are still becoming good friends.

On another note I am still trying to figure what is going on with my "wife". I am receiving mixed signals from her and don't really know which way is up right now. While i use this form as a way to put my thoughts out to the Universe, I am always open to suggestions or comments from those few whom stop by to read about my life.

Good day all.

I don't want to sound like i am whining because that is not what this is about. I know that most of what i am going through is because of decisions I have made, but that doesn't make things any less complicated.

I am currently going through a divorce from my wife of 5 years. It would seem that life has been working its way toward this decision for awhile now. The funny thing is I know what has to be done for the sake of my kids yet there is also another person involved.

I met this other lady online some time ago and we has since grown close through phone calls and talking online. I have come to care about her alot. Last night before i went to work, i tried to explain the situation with the legal battle that was about to happen and how vindictive my soon to be ex wife can be. ( she is the type that doesn't want me but doesnt want anyone else to have me either.) After i explained myself to my "friend" she must have felt that i had lied to her and thought i was trying to break off our relationship. Through great effort on my part, i tried to reassure her that my feelings for her were genuine and that though the divorce isn't final that she is the only one that my heart belongs to.

Before we hung up i thought things were ok with us but i haven't heard anything from her all day. This is unusual because she usually texts me to let me know that she got to work alright. I hope that she hasn't changed her mind about me.