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well today is sso crap its unbelieveable and if you want a nice chirpy Journal it aint this one jus so you know but anyway left my moby at home first ran all the way back to get it and missed my bus my own college work has jus been doubled because we got inspectors comin in sooon and LUCKY LUCKY ME has been "selected to be interviewed by them YAY(!) and to top it off got an e-mail off a good friend which has left me a lil messed up in my head but not in a bad way or agood way *sigh* I just wanna go to bed wake up in 6hrs and go and hear my mates band get wasted and go the Krazy house :-( am sorry but right now like right this minute the stupid F*CKIn computer is all i have to "talk" to and its actually kinda helpin (a lil bit) why does life suck sometimes? Oh well gotta go the bank wish me luck (my day could jus get a lot worse 8bitter laugh* but I'll try and be in a better mood next time i write in hear i like to think of myself as the life and soul of the party and when I get like this i piss myself off which makes my mood worse (go figure) till next time

Well am supposed to be on placement in college but my Doc's is taking its time with my clothiers report and I can't go on placement with out it which sux :-(

Its been an ok week so far I had a few phone calls from a good friend recently which made me very happy but I had to tell them something and well now am wondering will they call back ah well my own fault really if they don't.

Well am happy to say my crowning achievement to date is my Technical Certificate in Health and Social Care and the VEX which hopefully will be real 1 day.

"Thoughtless"



Thumbing through the pages of my fantasies

Pushing all the mercy down, down, down

I wanna see you try to take a swing at me

Come on, gonna put you on the ground, ground, ground



Why are you trying to make fun of me?

You think it's funny?

What the fuck you think it's doing to me?

You take your turn lashing out at me

I want you crying with your dirty ass in front of me



All of my hate cannot be found

I will not be drowned by your thoughtless scheming

So you can try to tear me down

Beat me to the ground

I will see you screaming



Thumbing through the pages of my fantasies

I'm above you, smiling at you, drown, drown, drown

I wanna kill and rape you the way you raped me

And I'll pull the trigger

And you're down, down, down



Why are you trying to make fun of me?

You think it's funny?

What the fuck you think it's doing to me?

You take your turn lashing out at me

I want you crying with your dirty ass in front of me



All of my hate cannot be found

I will not be drowned by your thoughtless scheming

So you can try to tear me down

Beat me to the ground

I will see you screaming



All my friends are gone, they died (gonna take you down)

They all screamed, and cried (gonna take you down)



I've got my body, got my body back against the wall

I've got my body, got my body back against the wall

Gonna take you down



[repeat 2x]



I've got my body, got my body back against the wall

I've got my body, got my body back against the...



All of my hate cannot be found

I will not be drowned by your thoughtless scheming

So you can try to tear me down

Beat me to the ground

I will see you screaming

All of my hate cannot be found

I will not be drowned by your thoughtless scheming

So you can try to tear me down

Beat me to the ground

I will see you screaming



I love my friends so much that if anything happened to them or me my wrath and thirst for vengence and retribution WOULD be satisfied