Tonight the tears poured down my forlorn face,
As I embraced the sadness deep inside my soul.
It engulfed me within the pain that escaped,
Through the very depth of my dying heart.
I cannot explain to you the pain that has found me,
When I thought that life could bring goodness and smiles.
I am slowly losing hope in love…
Please, will someone save me?
Don’t let me walk away without putting up a fight,
Don’t let me fall onto the ground,
When I can no longer see the light.
I am not the girl that you think I am.
I am hurt. I am scared. Don’t you understand?
I AM WEAK!
I need a helping hand, someone to tell me,
Just tell me… whisper it, scream it!
Whatever it takes to get it through my thick skull!
Cuz I have forgotten all the yesterdays,
That ever brought me smiles or happiness.
I have left behind any hope in love,
That I thought I might see one day.
And I am frightened.
I was always one to continue to live,
To want to find forever, eternity, destiny,
But now I may be giving it up…
Please, don’t let me…
I need strength to hold on, but who will give it to me?
They are all too worried about their own lives,
To realize that I am weak… so weak…
Don’t ask me what is wrong… you will not believe me.
"I am frightened," I said… as you laughed,
"But you don’t get frightened!" you replied…
"You are the strong one, the happy one,
The caregiver, and the one who gives!"
"No!" I screamed, "I am the one who is too weak to live."
I gave you too much strength; I have none left for me.
I am alone and no one is reaching their hands out to help.
Take the blade, cut it deep, and watch me bleed onto the floor…
Feel the painful sting as I cut a little more…
I feel the throbbing in my wrist as I reach a nerve,
"Do not stop!" I scream into my own thoughts,
As the blood gushes from my shaking wrist.
How could I cause myself this pain? I question.
Aren't we supposed to love ourselves?
Lord, why don’t I love me anymore!
Why can't I face the tears anymore!
This isn’t who I am… I am so different.
But I don’t have the time to find myself anymore.
Let me bleed… this is me…
My blood has never lied, never hidden,
Who the real person is deep inside.
But no one will love the person I don’t show,
They love the mysterious soul that I let them embrace,
They love the smile that I let them see,
If only they knew, Lord… this isn’t me…
I long to kiss you sweetly,
and press my lips to yours
you deny me all I'm worthy
and your closing all your doors.
I can't help but think I'm sorry
and that I have done you wrong
but I need to know you love me,
that you've loved me all along.
Can't you see that I still need you
that I long to feel your touch
I am dying here without you
cause I'm loving you that much!
Please do not forget me?
I'm needing you that bad
I'm sick and tired of crying
but I feel like I lost you, now I'm sad.
Should I say I'm sorry for what i do not know,
that I love you and I need you
but will that change the way you feel,
will that change the things you do?
I still long for loving,
all the great things that you are
knowing you'll forever be,
my forever, Deep Dark star!
COMMENTS
-