The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

Awakening
19:03 Sep 26 2006
Times Read: 571




This is what i experienced in my awakening..



A time comes in your life when you finally get it... when, in the midst of all your fears and insanity, you stop dead in your tracks and somewhere the voice inside your head cries out - ENOUGH!

Enough fighting and crying or struggling to hold on. And, like a child quieting down after a blind tantrum, your sobs begin to subside, you shudder once or twice, you blink back your tears and begin to look at the world through new eyes. This is your awakening. You realize it's time to stop hoping and waiting for something to change... or for happiness, safety and security to come galloping over the next horizon. You come to terms with the fact that neither of you is Prince Charming or Cinderella and that in the real world there aren't always fairy tale endings (or beginnings for that matter) and that any guarantee of "happily ever after" must begin with you... and in the process a sense of serenity is born of acceptance.

You awaken to the fact that you are not perfect and that not everyone will always love, appreciate or approve of who or what you are... and that's OK. They are entitled to their own views and opinions. And you learn the importance of loving and championing yourself... and in the process a sense of new found confidence is born of self-approval.

You stop complaining and blaming other people for the things they did to you (or didn't do for you) and you learn that the only thing you can really count on is the unexpected.

You learn that people don't always say what they mean or mean what they say and that not everyone will always be there for you and that it's not always about you. So, you learn to stand on your own and to take care of yourself... and in the process a sense of safety and security is born of self-reliance. You stop judging and pointing fingers and you begin to accept people as they are and to overlook their shortcomings and human frailties... and in the process a sense of peace and contentment is born of forgiveness.

You realize that much of the way you view yourself, and the world around you, is as a result of all the messages and opinions that have been ingrained into your psyche. And you begin to sift through all the junk you've been fed about how you should behave, how you should look, how much you should weigh, what you should wear, what you should do for a living, how much money you should make, what you should drive, how and where you should live, whom you should marry, the importance of having and raising children, and what you owe your parents, family, and friends.

You learn to open up to new worlds and different points of view. And you begin reassessing and redefining who you are and what you really stand for. You learn the difference between wanting and needing and you begin to discard the doctrines and values you've outgrown, or should never have bought into to begin with ... and in the process you learn to go with your instincts.

You learn that it is truly in giving that we receive. And that there is power and glory in creating and contributing and you stop maneuvering through life merely as a "consumer" looking for your next fix.

You learn that principles such as honesty and integrity are not the outdated ideals of a by gone era but the mortar that holds together the foundation upon which you must build a life. You learn that you don't know everything, it's not your job to save the world and that you can't teach a pig to sing.

You learn to distinguish between guilt and responsibility and the importance of setting boundaries and learning to say NO. You learn that the only cross to bear is the one you choose to carry and that martyrs get burned at the stake. Then you learn about love. How to love, how much to give in love, when to stop giving and when to walk away.

You learn to look at relationships as they really are and not as you would have them be. You stop trying to control people, situations and outcomes. And you learn that alone does not mean lonely. You also stop working so hard at putting your feelings aside, smoothing things over and ignoring your needs.

You learn that feelings of entitlement are perfectly OK...and that it is your right to want things and to ask for the things you want and that sometimes it is necessary to make demands. You come to the realization that you deserve to be treated with love, kindness, sensitivity and respect and you won't settle for less. And you learn that your body really is your temple. And you begin to care for it and treat it with respect.

You begin to eat a balanced diet, drink more water, and take more time to exercise. You learn that being tired fuels doubt, fear, and uncertainty and so you take more time to rest. And, just as food fuels the body, laughter fuels our soul. So you take more time to laugh and to play.

You learn that, for the most part, you get in life what you believe you deserve... and that much of life truly is a self-fulfilling prophecy. You learn that anything worth achieving is worth working for and that wishing for something to happen is different than working toward making it happen. More importantly, you learn that in order to achieve success you need direction, discipline and perseverance. You also learn that no one can do it all alone... and that it's OK to risk asking for help.

You learn the only thing you must truly fear is the greatest robber baron of all: FEAR itself. You learn to step right into and through your fears because you know that whatever happens you can handle it and to give in to fear is to give away the right to live life on your own terms. And you learn to fight for your life and not to squander it living under a cloud of impending doom.

You learn that life isn't always fair, you don't always get what you think you deserve and that sometimes bad things happen to unsuspecting, good people. On these occasions you learn not to personalize things. You learn that God/dess isn't punishing you or failing to answer your prayers. It's just life happening. And you learn to deal with evil in its most primal state - the ego. You learn that negative feelings such as anger, envy and resentment must be understood and redirected or they will suffocate the life out of you and poison the universe that surrounds you. You learn to admit when you are wrong and to build bridges instead of walls.

You learn to be thankful and to take comfort in many of the simple things we take for granted, things that millions of people upon the earth can only dream about: a full refrigerator, clean running water, a soft warm bed, a long hot shower. Slowly, you begin to take responsibility for yourself by yourself and you make yourself a promise to never betray yourself and to never, ever settle for less than your heart's desire. And you hang a wind chime outside your window so you can listen to the wind. And you make it a point to keep smiling, to keep trusting, and to stay open to every wonderful possibility.

Finally, with courage in your heart and God/dess by your side you take a stand, you take a deep breath, and you begin to design the life you want to live as best you can.

Respect
18:24 Sep 22 2006
Times Read: 586

Ok ive been on this site for about two maybe three weeks and i have this thing to where i like to talk to females not to hit on them or to try anything like that.... and almost every time i talk to one they are really surprised that i am not trying to hit on them and it usually takes me three or four days to get them to talk to me as a friend... the thing is these fucking horn dogs are constantly being retarded and also going on about it the wrong way.... most of these females on here are here to talk to people they can relate to not for dating... well i cant say that for all of them but if all your going to do is click around on look for the women who you think looks cute just so you can talk to them you might as well log off and never come back... because most of them just want to talk.... next to love i belive that is one of the greatest gifts you can ever give a female is you attention as a good person who cares and maybe a little input if they need it .... and all i have to say is RESPECT these females here there not pieces of meat.....

Death
14:19 Sep 16 2006
Times Read: 598

Death is a good thing if you think about it.... we may not know what life is but we do know what death is maybe now what happens.... some people see death as the ending of their life a life they have not yet finished enjoying.... so that is part of the fear of is the other part it fear of the unknown, there is a quote that my best friend Lonergirl told me " man fears what they dont understand " and " and what man fears he tries to destroy" and by me saying the second quote i mean look at all the people througout history great leaders, kings, generals, conqorers, priests, pharohs espcially the egyptians, and even a person that alot of you like on this site VLAD DRACULE a.k.a. Vlad the impailer they all try to find a way for eternal life and there is no way to have eternal life you may be able to find a way to prolong it but not make it last forever with death is the ending of life but its the beginning of another one... no matter what you belive in... even if you dont belive in anything you have to at least believe there is some form of life after death, weather its reincarnation which i belive in or its the heaven/hell ideal... even in my religion the is i guess you can say a form of heaven its called Summerland.... see i dont fear death... and alot of people say they dont as well but they are usually talking out of there ass to act hard because they have nothing better to do.... but i can tell you why i dont fear death because im curious... i dont see death as anything more than a final release at the completion of your life, and as a learning experience.... folks dont be afraid of death, if anything be afraid of life... because you all know how Fucked up life is, no one knows how death is... so take it as a learning experience, dont try to learn it as fast as possible but when Death comes knocking at your door... shake his hand and say "WHAZZZAAAAPP"

Hate
19:21 Sep 14 2006
Times Read: 606

Hate is a very strong word i believe its what you say when there is no stronger emotional word for you disliking someone, its funny i have disliked people to where i cant stand to be around them but there is always that chance you can make up your dislikes for that person but me when i say i hate someone the best thing they can do is NOT TALK TO ME because if i say i hate you if i have the chance I WILL KILL YOU!!!! there will be no second thought about it and i can honestly say there is only one person i hate and the bad thing is i have to see him every day and every night because i work with him an we are in the same room and i swear to god if he doesnt die by my hand he will die soon enough because of his lies and the way he is DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE YOU SORRY SACK OF WORTHLESS SHIT!!!!! cant you see you son of a bitch no one wants you around you have no friends and the world will be a better place without you and if you die and i wish you will i WILL HAVE NO FUCKING REGRETS.... hell i even throw a party when you die you no good waste of space i will probably bust a nut from happieness.

Sex
16:00 Sep 14 2006
Times Read: 612

sex is a thing that is highly exadurated and overused one of the biggest problem with sex is is that people do it just to pass time or its addicting, but the thing is is that sex is in my personal opinion is about two things procreation, and for passion, intimacy and staight up raw human interests i belive yes sex is a great thing but when it is overdone especially with multiple partners it can lead to very serious problems like im not all Christian, by no means but i still believe sex should be expressed openly but still reserved, like the first time i had sex it was with a woman i loved deeply so i have no regrets and thats a great thing and since then i have had the belife that it should be done with someone you at least share deep feelings and caring for it shouldent be like "man i fucking horney lets go out and find some fucking booty" no it should be like man im horny but i can either use "Palmala Handerson" or i should wait for a very nice girl or go to the girl you are currently dating. guys as long as you TRY to keep a healthy relationship you should be fine an in a relationship sex will eventually come dont go out an cheat on your femal cause 7 times out of 10 that girl will not cheat on you if you have a healthy good careing relationship than everything will be fine...... JUST TRY if you have the opportunity like I DONT try to have a good relationship.....

Life
23:35 Sep 13 2006
Times Read: 616

Life is weird no one can explain it, its something thats just there,.... no one knows why... no one knows how the hardest thing to explain in life is love,.. love is that feeling the utter most intense form of happieness that no one can describe so in turn life=love and love=happiness, but the biggest problem in life is either finding or dealing with love, so in another turn life-love=comfort and comfort=dull and dull is not how life is supposed to be so in there we find a paradox an equation that loops that we know there is an answer to the problem but we cant find it so the ultimate goal in life is to find love to find that answer to find the meaning of life.... so Life+Love=happiness-comfort-dull=the meaning of life.