The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

Why is it called a soap opera when nobody sings?

Why does jello have a smell when you add the powder in the water, but when it "gels" the scent virtually disappears?

Can a unborn baby fart or burp?

If a baseball player hits a home run over the fence, but then dies before he can run around the bases, does the home run count?

If a General is a higher ranking officer than a Major, then why is a major illness worse than a general illness?

Why don't they make Root Beer flavored ice cream? Wouldn't it be better than root beer floats?

Why is there never a full English dinner or tea but there is always a full English breakfast?

What is the point in saying "may I ask" and then follow it up with a question?



Is it possible to be allergic to water?

When an atheist swears on a Bible before they testify in court do they have to tell the whole truth and nothing but the truth since they don't believe in God?

Why do cats like to dig their paws into something before they lay down on it?

If a pack of gum says that each piece is 10 calories, is that amount just chewing the gum, or also for swallowing it?

Why is there a little countdown (like 8, 7, 6, 5, 4) near the bottom of the copyright info page in the beginning of many books?

Why does the Easter bunny carry eggs? Rabbits don't lay eggs.

How come only your fingers and toes get wrinkly in the shower and nothing else does?

Isn't it weird that all year round your parents tell you not to play with fire, but on Independence Day they hand you a package of explosives, a lighter, and say have fun?

Are tomatoes fruits or vegetables?

How come lotion is colored, but when you put it on, it doesn't turn your skin that color?

Are you a parking ticket? (What?) You got fine written all over you.

You make me melt like hot fudge on a sundae.

Can I borrow a quarter? ["What for?"]

... I want to call my mom and tell her I just met the girl of my dreams.

Pick up a pack of sugar that actually says, "sugar" on it and say, "You dropped your nametag!".

What does it feel like to be the most beautiful girl in this room?

Do you believe in the hereafter? Well, then I guess you know what I'm here after.

Are your legs tired, because you've been running through my mind all day long.

Do you have a Bandaid? Because I just scraped my knee falling for you.

There must be something wrong with my eyes, I can't take them off you.

Girl, you better have a license, cuz you are driving me crazy!

Hey baby, you've got something on your butt: my eyes.

Hi, I make more money than you can spend.

I hope you know CPR, because you take my breath away.

Damn, if being sexy was a crime, you'd be guilty as charged!

I must be in heaven because I'm standing next to you!

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together.

You must be from out of space cause I can see the stars in your eyes.

If you were a booger I'd pick you first.

Can I have directions? ["To where?"] To your heart.

Baby did you fart, 'cause you blow me away!

Hi, I'm Mr. Right. Someone said you were looking for me.

Turn to the girl sitting next to you at the bar and say...

"I'm not really this tall....I'm sitting on my wallet."

Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?

When I saw you from across the room, I passed out cold and hit my head on

the floor...so I'm going to need your name and number for insurance reasons.

You know what? Your eyes are the same color as my Porsche.

Do you have a map? Because I just keep getting lost in your eyes!

Is there an airport nearby or is that my heart taking off?

Do you have any raisins? No? How about a date?

1 . Tell her she is beautiful, not hot, fine or sexy.



2 . Hold her hand at any moment even if it is just for a second.



3 . Kiss her on the forehead.



4 . Leave her voice messages to wake up to.



5 . Always tell her you love her at any and all times.



6 . When she is upset hold her tight and tell her how much



she means to you.



7 . Recognize the small things . . . they usally mean the most.



8 . Call her sweety. {not baby}



9 . Sing to her no matter how horrible your voice is.



10 . Pick her over all the other girls you hang out with.



11 . Write her notes. {she loves them}



12 . Introduce her to family and friends as your girlfriend.



13 . Play with her hair.



14 . Pick her up, tickle her and play-wrestle with her.



15 . Sit in the park and just talk to her.



16 . Tell her funny jokes, tell her stupid jokes, just tell her jokes.



17 . Throw pebbles at her window in the middle of the night just



because you missed her.



18 . Let her fall asleep in your arms.



19 . Carve your names into a Tree.



20 . If she's mad at you, kiss her.



21 . Give her piggyback rides.



22 . Bring her Flowers just because.



23 . Treat her the same around your friends as you do when your alone.



24 . Look her in the eyes and smile.



25 . Let her take as many pictures of you as she wants.



26 . Slow dance with her, even if there isn't any music playing.



27 . Kiss her in the rain.



28 . If you're in love with her . . . Tell her.

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