The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

My moment of self-pity.. desperation and sadness... how i wish i could grow wings and fly far away..



blackbird... fly...

blackbird... fly...

into the light of the dark black night...



blackbird... fly...

blackbird... fly...

into the light of the dark black night...



take these broken wings and learn to fly...

*sigh*



I just wanna cry.. I cant sleep.. I lay there in bed.. for an hour.. two.. cant fall asleep.. the hubby laying there.. snoring away.. damn it.. cant sleep.. so tired.. what the heck is wrong with me? need sleep... got up... showered... ate a bowl of cereal... debating going to the bank and post office.. too tired.. wondering if i should drive... blast it.. i need either sleeping pills or a gun.. either way.. i still need sleep...sleep..

Earlier this morning, I was just having a conversation with someone about how I was pissing and moaning about all the "repeat" acolyte questions.. and how I felt like I'd answered a hundred of em lately... and not to say that others don't do it.. I just felt like theres been too many that I myself have done lately... and about how some acolytes and dominars just want the title but none of the responsibility... (my moment of emo-ness)... so...



Later on, I got this angry message from someone because I had RIA'd his post. Initially, I was peeved.. especially with his attitude.. But in the end, it all worked out fine.. and for that I am very glad. Made me feel good that it didnt end up with anyone holding grudges.. and that I had done my job.. and if only HE in the end understood why I RIA'd his thread (or any of us Dominars closing any threads), thats one more persn then before..



________________



On 15:48:36 Jul 29 2006 ******* wrote:



I dont understand why you had closed my thread in Forum?

I need a good reason and very fast too...

please..





On 15:49:10 Jul 29 2006 BelleIsra wrote:



New rules given to us from Cancer.





On 15:53:27 Jul 29 2006 ******* wrote:



what rules...

I dont know nothing?

mah...

I write in a right forum...

Or only some member can do what they want...and the other nothing?





On 15:58:29 Jul 29 2006 BelleIsra wrote:



I'm not singling you out or anything. These are just the rules. The other ones that are not RIA are those that are categorized as "Personal Announcements."



Journal announcements do not fall under that category.



Here is what Cancer gave Dominars as rule pertaining to the mascara section:



-"Section 2 needs a lot of work. If a thread is an 'announcement/advertisement' type (updated my profile, check out my profile, portfolio, journal, etc), delete all replies, and mark the thread RIA. (I know I marked a bunch RIP last night. In the future the rest should be RIA). This will allow the thread to exist for 24-48 hours. It will serve its purpose as an announcement. Exceptions to this rule can be made if a thread contains substance."



As I added to your second post, ask for messages sent to you.





On 16:05:18 Jul 29 2006 ******* wrote:



Ok...

I dont write...anithing in this section





On 16:14:21 Jul 29 2006 BelleIsra wrote:



That isnt the point..



The reason this new rule is being instated is to decrease the amount of unneccessary posts such as- (using your post for an example)

"I liked it." "Good journal entry."



I would suggest, as I wrote in the second closed thread.. "Please message me with reactions to my new journal entry. Thanks." or "I just wrote a new journal entry and I would love some feedback. Please message me."



It decreases the amount of posts that will need to be deleted and helps the system run faster. As well as, you'd have a higher chance of getting sincere responses instead of those wanting to up their forum posts. This way also ensures conversation between you and the reader.



I hope you understand what I am trying to say.





On 16:19:23 Jul 29 2006 ******* wrote:



I understand...

but I know, if I dont write in Forum after 2 hours my journal entry its lost...

cuz we are a lot of ppl...and nobody see all new entry...

only if I was on the firt page to journal update I see 8 ppl add me in jornal favourite list...

if you had read my journal you know I spend a lot of time to search and make a good article fast to read and interested...

sorry my bad english I am Italian and dont know well english..

thank the same...





On 16:29:17 Jul 29 2006 ******* wrote:



By all means, advertise in the forums that you have a new journal entry up. That doesn't need to change.



But as in the copy and paste I sent you of the new rule concerning the mascara section that Cancer put out- It will be RIA'd but it will continue to sit there for the next 24-36 hours. It will be seen.



Plus, I know for a fact, that at least 2 others besides me search through the journal entries for interesting ones to read.



As well as, depending on the subject matter of the article, you could always submit it to be put under "Member Articles."



Oh, and I don't mind the, "English not being so good." I always remember a quote from a movie..



"I may speak with an accent, but I do not think with an accent."



Plus, I'm first generation American.. I'm used to it with my family. :)





On 16:36:05 Jul 29 2006 ******* wrote:



oh thats good....

for the next time I hope to remember your advise...

;)

lol...

and I continue to write and I think if I write something of nice other member are interested to read...

If nobody read....no problem are there in journal...

;)





On 16:37:40 Jul 29 2006 BelleIsra wrote:



I am sure you will... I hope that things are cleared up now then?





On 16:40:59 Jul 29 2006 ******* wrote:

oh yeah of course..

I was only a bit angry cuz I see my post RIA after 20 second that I write...

hehehe....now it's ok...

I understand very well

thanks..

________________



Feels good not to end this with DIE DIE DIE.. LOL

Because Lown insisted.. LOL (except I fixed the spellings.. :P)





I am an Amethyst Dragon!



Hey, I took the http://dragonhame.com online Inner Dragon quiz and found out I am a Amethyst Dragon on the inside.



In the war between good and evil, an Amethyst Dragon tends to walk the fine line of Neutrality....

When it comes to the powers of Chaos vs. those of Law and Order, your inner dragon walks a fine line between Law and Chaos....

As far as magical tendancies, Magical spells come as natural to the Amethyst Dragon as breath from it's body....

During combat situations, whether by spells or by claw, your inner dragon will do whatever it takes to get the job done....

The Amethyst Dragon makes its home in the deep caverns of the earth, often in mountainous regions. They spend much time in hibernation as one of their favorite things to do is to sleep.'

Formed from translucent amethyst, it is an awe inspiring sight to see one in it's true form. Light passes through the dragon's body creating a deep purple glow. It's scales will magnify the light rays into bright lavender beams to highlight this effect.'

Amethyst dragons spend most of their time homebound but do occasionally feel the need to take a sojourn to a far destination. These dragons love books and will often pick their destination from one of the many stories and histories they may have read. Amethyst dragons are very solitary in nature, but do keep a distant watch on the world around them. They tend to be highly intelligent, and often amuse themselves in human form by building gadgets and toys. Amethyst dragons are very learned creatures.

'

This Dragons favorite elements are: Amethyst, Deep Places, and Magic



http://Dragonhame.Com

Being raised a traditional Hmong, I've long believed that I've lived before. I don't claim to know, or to remember any of my past lives.. but I do believe that everyone I know in this life, I've known before. I wish I could meet someone who could tell me about my past lives.. maybe it would give me insight on what I'm supposed to do.. or why I'm doing the things I'm doing now, etc...



www.thebigview.com says:



Your past life diagnosis: I don't know how you feel about it, but you were male in your last earthly incarnation.You were born somewhere in the territory of modern Burma around the year 1525. Your profession was that of a seaman, dealer, businessman or broker.



Your brief psychological profile in your past life:

As a natural talent in psychology, you knew how to use your opportunities. Cold-blooded and calm in any situation.



The lesson that your last past life brought to your present incarnation:

Your task is to learn determination and persistency. You should not allow to let misfortunes take influence on your strong will.



__________________



Maybe I should listen to that lesson...

I changed it to something I came up with...



“Far too many believe that a picture is worth a thousand words, but, those people forget that the correct words surpass a million pictures.”



And its not to bash the original quote this is referring to: "A picture is worth a thousand words." But, when some kid put his own picture up and the words, "my picture is all you need to know," it isnt all I need to know. Cause I don't really need or want to know then. Hence, where my line comes into play... give me not pretty words, just honest ones and thats where I'll take the knowledge from...

Yea, too lazy to change it.. so just read it. Though I'll have to download the James Brown version, we only have the Edwin Starr version...





Join Us!!!

05:39:32 - Jul 18 2006

Times Read: 94





I totally forgot about this...



There is a thang going round the net at the moment, where on the 10th August, at 5pm GMT (12 noon EST), everyone in the world has to put on James Brown - War, open all their windows and turn up their stereos.



So far, I've hit five forums and all my onlime gamer friends and some of them already knew about it.



I've covered WoW, Battlefield 2 and asked someone to do city of hero's for me.



Someone is doing Deviant Art already...



I'm making email rounds too, so...



Tell everyone you know. This is a global protest. We want to show that we won't take this shit anymore.



Ever heard of a movie called 'Network'?



Made in the seventies. Top notch critical examination of the mass media mindset, even back then, it was fucked up.



Similar idea, but with James Brown playing. Tell it like it is people. You want to stop the war, then join us and let your neighbours, your politicians, your bosses and the world know it.



Democracy is dead- free speech is our only recourse.



And what better way is it expressed than in music?



PM me if you will, email all your friends, post in all your forums. Write to your MP, your congressman, your local radio station. Make it happen, make the world take notice that we, the people, 'aren't gonna take this any more'.

Member: ******

Subject: Suggestion

Date: Jul 28 2006



Question: The first time I posted - my post was deleted - it was in the wrong forum and it agravated me. Now I know better. But a suggestion I have is that on the Main Forum page - maybe a link to the Forum rules should be first - and tell people to read it or their posts are subject to deletion. For a newbie - it is difficult to go look up all the rules and we all know - people don't read everything they should. Yes I am guilty of that. Just a suggestion - thanks for listening.





__________________

*sigh*



my reply:



This is copy and paste from the VR Manual. Right there, under the Main Menu. It is THERE for everyone to read.







The Forum

Posting Guidelines





Administrators follow a set of content guidelines regarding Forum posts. Reasons for post deletion may include (but are not limited to):



# Posts of a political nature

# Posts that ridicule the philosophical tenants of any religion

# Rude, obnoxious, hate, or flame posts

# Overly sexual posts

# Personality question posts (What color underwear do you wear?)

# Threads that do not fit the theme of Vampire Rave

# Replies to threads that are not on-topic

# Posts made to the wrong Forum section

# Duplicate posts

# Silly, nonsensical, or ridiculous posts. This includes posts that contain nothing but "I agree" or "I'll check it out"

There are 4 Forum sections. Each section carries additional section-specific guidelines:



# Posts in section 1 must be relevant and on topic.

# Posts in section 2 that are announcement or advertising in nature will have all replies deleted. The thread will then be marked RIA. The thread will stay on the server for 24-48 hours (serving its announcement purpose) and will then be automatically deleted.

# Posting guidelines in section 4 are more lax. However, all threads that are auto-closed for length are marked RIA, not RIP.

Vampire Rave has high posting standards. If your thread or post is closed or deleted, you should learn from the experience and construct better posts in the future. Nagging Dominars or Administrators about your threads/replies getting closed/deleted is a good way to get suspended. Be respectful toward those that donate their time in service of Vampire Rave.





_________________



There is no point in having a link there, when ideally, BEFORE posting in the forums, everyone should have read the manual and know the rules and restrictions to posting (in this case.) But thank you for the suggestion.



_________________





addition: She writes back: "It was just a suggestion."



MY reply

"And I did acknowledge that.. and in fact, thanked you for it.



______________________

DIE DIE DIE!!!

Member: ********

Subject: Why has my post count so drastically decreased!!!

Date: Jul 27 2006



Question: My post count was at least 129 a week ago when I got on, today it shows me as only having 70 posts, when I attempted updating my status it dropped me from literally 60% to 0% because of this error. I don't enjoy what time I do spend here because this is not the first time something like this has happened, I have tried to keep cool but in all honest you're about to be one member short on here (which I realize you got at least 7 in the time I was typing this.) But could someone please explain to me why I seem to be the only person this is happening to.



______________

My answer:



In all actuality, you are not the only member that has happened to. I myself lost over 100 forum posts.



The reason behind this is that as Cancer is updating and changing things, certain threads have been deleted off the database, in turn lowering forum post totals for a lot of the members. They cannot be retrieved, and the only thing we can do is keep posting.





*addition: this was replied back to me- "Well I can't take this anymore, I'm tired of losing everything I worked for, I'm tired of sick perverts emailing me about "bondage"

How do I delete myself?"



So? I told her how to delete... but also offered her the advice of taking advantage of the block button. *shrugs* oh wells

_______________



This may have been my 5th or 6th acolyte question of the night that had to do with this (not counting the two personal messages I recieved from individuals)



Ealier- read bottom up:





BelleIsra:

05:19:15 - Jul 27 2006

im a firm believer of the benefits of pre membership

DELETE



vamporion:

05:19:12 - Jul 27 2006

im my way of viewing its not, it will benefit to the houses r coven of whic we belong to to make better pros

DELETE



BelleIsra:

05:18:56 - Jul 27 2006

LOL.. ive spent my share on house contest prizes of prem memberships...

DELETE



lownignitus:

05:18:02 - Jul 27 2006

Why shouldnt they pay? If you really like this site that much then it is worth it. Plus being a freebie is lame.

DELETE



BelleIsra:

05:17:18 - Jul 27 2006

nah, just my opinion

DELETE



alixaryon:

05:16:42 - Jul 27 2006

ow yeah i bet this all is propaganda so ppls should pay!!!!

DELETE



BelleIsra:

05:15:55 - Jul 27 2006

in my mind, i think it should be a pre mem perk

DELETE



alixaryon:

05:15:49 - Jul 27 2006

ow good i really need a nuke now,i think fallout 2 is better than vampirethemasquerade !!!!!WOOFWOOF grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr rrrrrr

DELETE



vamporion:

05:15:18 - Jul 27 2006

true true,

DELETE



lownignitus:

05:15:04 - Jul 27 2006

That sucks.. Maybe he should become a Premeium Member then. Its cheap. And you can still view comments >:)

DELETE



BelleIsra:

05:14:35 - Jul 27 2006

thats what i said

DELETE



vamporion:

05:14:14 - Jul 27 2006

oh that thing, cancer still prob working on that

DELETE



BelleIsra:

05:13:27 - Jul 27 2006

he's a little upset he cant see his comments

DELETE





BelleIsra:

05:12:33 - Jul 27 2006

alix- its a choice, you made the choice to join.. no one's holding a gun to your head to keep you here

DELETE



Demagorgon:

05:11:52 - Jul 27 2006

Morning vamporion!

DELETE



BelleIsra:

05:11:46 - Jul 27 2006

good day vamporion

DELETE



alixaryon:

05:11:31 - Jul 27 2006

well i aint smooth for sure anymore!!!!screw this site!!!!!

DELETE



vamporion:

05:11:10 - Jul 27 2006

morning ppl

DELETE



BelleIsra:

05:11:06 - Jul 27 2006

blah.. yea, ok.

DELETE



BelleIsra:

05:10:48 - Jul 27 2006

so if something unexpected happens, just deal

DELETE





BelleIsra:

05:10:18 - Jul 27 2006

the whole point of these code changes, etc, is to help the site run smoother and faster

DELETE



Lozen:

05:10:08 - Jul 27 2006

lol

DELETE



BelleIsra:

05:09:55 - Jul 27 2006

it isnt like cancer sat there one day and was like- lets mess with peoples heads

DELETE



alixaryon:

05:09:21 - Jul 27 2006

yeah look at me im swinging ten axes and a nuke GRrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr rrrrrrrrrrrrrrowl

DELETE



Demagorgon:

05:08:36 - Jul 27 2006

alixaryon chill :) This kind of glitches happen :)

DELETE



BelleIsra:

05:07:38 - Jul 27 2006

it isnt the end of the world

DELETE



BelleIsra:

05:07:27 - Jul 27 2006

dude, breathe

DELETE



alixaryon:

05:06:37 - Jul 27 2006

no sys message was:glitch, but now it is repaired,soooooooo sorry for thise inconvinience blabla bla but "dear' member dont worry,cuz you will be rerated again @#@%@#%$^#@%%@#$#@$@ #%%@%WOOF

DELETE



Lozen:

05:05:14 - Jul 27 2006

I know

DELETE





BelleIsra:

05:04:49 - Jul 27 2006

the only person who can answer that is cancer

DELETE





Lozen:

05:04:00 - Jul 27 2006

it will be fixed soon, i imagine

DELETE



alixaryon:

05:03:47 - Jul 27 2006

yeah the number of rateings is there but the pics and comments and all the other stuff is gone grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr rrrrrrrr aoooooooo ooooooooooooooooooo ooo

DELETE



BelleIsra:

05:01:12 - Jul 27 2006

the comments just do not show up, they ARE there

DELETE



alixaryon:

04:59:35 - Jul 27 2006

rerate please since the glitch destroyed all the comments thky

DELETE



____





Bitch and moan.. leave the site then... let us who WANT to be here, be in relative peace.. and have less morons complaining and whining about every change... *throws hands up in the air* Grrrr...



And shits.. while I'm working on this journal entry, it happens AGAIN in the vampbox.. goodness..

Yea, what the headline said..



Craps.. I AM tired.. I yawn.. I start to doze.. I get into bed.. NOTHING.. I lay there.. 5 minutes pass... I turn.. 10 minutes... I turn back..



Screw it, I say, log back on to VR and here I sit.



I hate insomnia.. just let me sleep.. blast it!

So, this is whats going on in the Vamp box (read from bottom up)... which just irks me to no end.









Annullo:

22:01:01 - Jul 26 2006

now im listening to some opera

DELETE



keindrea:

21:59:46 - Jul 26 2006

i like everything but country ethnic music is cool too..i love african and indonesian

DELETE



Annullo:

21:58:54 - Jul 26 2006

i even listen to some african tribal music

DELETE



keindrea:

21:58:39 - Jul 26 2006

nope each to their own thats just my opinion on country..and i crisisize none for their choices

DELETE



BelleIsra:

21:58:34 - Jul 26 2006

then thats your opinion

DELETE





Annullo:

21:58:15 - Jul 26 2006

i hate country with a passion

DELETE



BelleIsra:

21:57:46 - Jul 26 2006

theres nothing wrong with country

DELETE





keindrea:

21:57:33 - Jul 26 2006

county..boooooooooo

DELETE





Annullo:

21:57:03 - Jul 26 2006

i was still pretty young but i listen to everything...well everything but country

DELETE





__________________





Ok, you LOVE every style of music BUT country.. you listen to tribal, african music, indonesian music... even opera.. but HATE country with a passion. What the fuck is so WRONG with country? Its just another genre of music...



Is it because they don't talk about death, suicide, killing each other, drinking blood or worshipping Satan? That you can ACTUALLY understand the words being said? Is it because they talk about love, and once in a while, their horses or tractors? LOL WHAT is it about country that makes you HATE it with a PASSION?



I don't get it. I just don't...

Ok, next time someone says drink with me.. I'm gonna think twice.. LOL



I'm only slightly loopy now.. very mellowed out.. :)



3 big tall glasses of vodka and coke... yum, but wowee.. LOL



thats enough of a journal entry tonight. :P

http://pnr.thebestreviews.com/



Robin T. Popp- Seduced by the Night- 6/01/06 (which means I need to get it, along with the first in the series: Out of the Night.)



Erin McCarthy- High Stakes, 8/1/06



Kimberly Raye- Dead End Dating, 8/29/06



J.R. Ward- Lover Awakened (Third in series "Novel of the Black Dagger), 9/5/06



Christine Feehan- Dark Celebration (yippee!! the reunion book), 9/5/06



Michele Bardsley- I'm the Vampire, That's Why, 9/6/06

"except who I am

Posted: 18:25:07 - Jul 23 2006

Times viewed: 36



when your on VR or hanging with your friends you feel excepted.My friends and most of my family except that I'm into dark stuff,but theres one member in my family that doesn't except me and thats......my own mother.She doesn't like how I act,she doesn't like most of my friends and she hates the color of my room just b/c it's dark,she technichlly hates everything that I do.Everyone in my family excepts me,but my mom can't even except who I am."









Subject title made me curious.. so I read it..



pretty serious thread.. lost me part way through though.. due to no one or anything.. just my attention span (I wonder if I have a mild ADD?)



uh, where was I? Oh yes..



So, the whole time I was skimming the thread.. the only thought running through my head? WHY THE HELL IS IT SPELT "except?"



except: "With the exclusion of; other than; but: everyone except me."



accept: "To receive something, especially with favor"



So I sat there.. as a dominar.. I have power to edit- which means I COULD go in and fix the spelling... but would that just make me a BITCH? cause I had to fix it? grr.. so I left it.. but now I can't look at the damn thread cause the spelling of it annoys me..



gah! not only do I suspect I have mild ADD.. maybe I have a mild form of OCD too.. damn..







*edit- someone changed it! yahoo! now its not so annoying.. thank you.. who ever fixed the spelling. :)

Sometimes I feel like walking away from the Rave... just too many stupid people, and stupid things that go on.



*sigh*



Where is the love yallz? Cripes..



I think I need to attempt to make more friends OFFLINE.. its just.. its Salem for pete's sake.. most people here find me.. strange.. LOL..



gosh I miss having at least my sister around...



blast it.. blast it all!

So, in my profile, I have pictures of my sister with HER dog Sugar. And I even write a disclaimer that it isn't my dog. It just proves people just look at the pictures. LOL



SOOoooo... let me clarify.. THIS is my dog Theoden (yes, as in king of Rohan from Lord of the Rings- Dan's a fan. :))

So I played Risk for the first time tonight. My one brother in law, was very patient and understanding- spent a lot of time telling me the rules and explaining all the do's and dont's...



but I will never play with the OTHER brother in law again.. man, what a whiner. My mission was to conquer North America and Australia.. he had, conquer 24 territories. Well shit, that means, eventually, I'll try to conquer Australia.. which he happened to "own." Man, whine whine whine... "Just what are you doing?" as I'm kicking ass and get to the very last territory... "Why are you doing this to me?"



Now, if you've ever played Risk before, its a GAME.. and the objective is to complete your mission (If youre playing the secret mission way)... whine whine.. pissed me off..



Coincidentally, I lost the very last territory.. had I NOT lost, I woulda beat the game... instead.. I almost walked out. BUT.. I'm bigger then that, so I shut up and kept playing. I lost.. but.. at least it was to the brother in law that was so patient with me that won.



I'm glad I married Dan and not his twin... I would have killed him by now. LOL

LOL- I've seen too many people do this one, NOT to.. follower? I can be.. what of it? :P Punk.. tee hee

You have a sexual IQ of 134 When it comes to sex, you are a super genius. You have had a lot of experience, and sex interests you so you know a lot about it. You pride yourself on being a source of information and guidance to all of your friends. Take this quiz at QuizUniverse.com

Mother-in-laws.. sometimes people get lucky (DAN) cause theyre MIL's think theyre uber-Gods and can do no wrong. And then there are MIL's that make you insecure, self-conscious, and dread every time you MAY meet.. *sigh* MIL's... yea..



YARD work.. I HATE yard work. I have major allergies, but I feel bad leaving it all up to Dan, so I go do it, but them am dealing with the affects for 2 or 3 days laters.



Here I go... yay for yard work...

Well this song is for Sahahria... We gotta laugh at ourselves because this song hits too many true things NOT to be funny. Enjoy!



I had "The Woman Song" playing.. :P

ERm...



I have decided.. I am a people pleaser. I go out of my way to help people.. even complete strangers- if I can. I admit to liking and needing praise for good deeds, or I always wonder. I don't normally second-guess myself, or NEED everyone to like me. But.. unfortunately, no matter how many times I tell myself and others that I am that way, or want to be that way.. it still hurts in the beginning.



My heart is achey at the moment.. and I need a big bowl of ice cream. :)