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So what am I going to be talking about to my self today, well its 10mins to the witching hour I am listening to a song posted over on Diana's journal.



So let us begin with something that ive realised today, people change, people that you thought that it was impossible for them to change. It may only be me but have you ever had an image in your head of someone you've built up over the years putting them way high up there in your mind. Then you see them again for the first time since then, and they come tumbling down from that pedestal they sat on.



Now there on the floor in bits and you dont understand what you ever saw in them in the first place. Then as your looking at the pieces you notice scattered in between them are the memories that you'd thought you'd lost but no they are there just hidden in the midst of it all.



You now slowly begin to pick up the pieces one by one each piece a memory of why you loved and found them so breath taking. You find your self mourning as if they have died because they did well you version did. They arnt that person any-more. You've held on for so long to that person you knew way back when that getting to see them now destroys your concept of them.



Its not gone you have to put it back together again but for the first time in years you begin to remember the things that made them what they were to you. You find your self smiling yet crying at the same time.



Laughter in a pool of tears, ironic I guess. Why cant we go back and change the mistakes we did , why do they always have to stay with us to punish us for what we let go and then bring them back only to give us memories of the past and tears of regret.



I find my self now sitting writing this out thinking of the regret yet smiling at the memories. It cruel and yet I want more memories of it to come back the good times out weigh the bad and that's what makes it worth remembering.



Regret is a bitch, and I hate you.



The music has stopped by now, im in silence.