Well, I hate it when I am right... I suspected for long time that something was wrong with me and today I had a partial confirmation... some of my organs are not how they were supposed to be but the one I was afraid the most had the most modifications... the doctor said that could be just an infection, but it is already two years since the symptoms started manifesting strongly... and with my luck, it has to be something serious... some adenomas grow for years before switching to malignancy... anyway , i have to do some more tests, but I believe the damage has been done... I have multiple organ defficiency and so I am not expecting anything good... but, who knows, maybe this time I am wrong and is just some chronic infection...
I am gonna leave for a conference tomorrow... but until then, still having some things to take care off... the interesting fact is that if those things don`t come out the way I want, I don`t think I want to come back... or even be alive...
Ehh, stupid morbid thoughts...just my nature! Don`t mind them...
The fact is that I wanted to say, especially for those who thought that having me in their life meant something... If something happens to me (not necesarily now), I want you all to not cry for me... just be happy for the life I had, think about the fact that you made my life mean something and that through you, I will never be gone...
I just wanted to say... thank you all!
Hope to see you soon!
P.S. I will be back from the conference, hopefully, on june the 18th.
Life is too short to waste it on tears....
Monday, beginning of a whole new week...it has been a real shit today!
First, I had to wake up early because I had to take my sister to the station; of course, being with the car and seeing the sun, I didn`t dress too good...the result? She mislead me and arrived at the station a lot earlier than the train was supposed to be there, a very cold wind was blowing and I had only a T-shirt and froze like Hell! Plus, I was late at work!
That seemed nothing...But, after trying not to fall asleep at the morning brief, the coffee was not good (not made by me), my stomach was hurting, I had a very unpleasant surprise when my superviser told me that one of the patientes I had was going to die, informed the family, and then the family asked me why was the woman dieing and how will she gonna die...and I had to explain...
Half an hour later, my father called and he told me that he had a work accident; some substance spilled in his eyes...took the car, rushed to his work, rushed back to the hospital, waited until the eye-doctor gave him a full consult, trying to calm him down, because he was panicking, rushed with him back to his work to take some of his things then took him home, gave him some drugs, then went back to the hospital...There, after stayin another long hour and seeing the patients, found out that another patient of mine had some sort of vascular brain ischemia and that he is going to be very difficult to handle and he will probably die soon too.
After the work day was over, gone home, bought some more drugs, then, back to my other home, and found out that the stupid network was not working again...gone to the neatwork headquarters and had a little chat with the admins, paid my monthly fee and the network is still not working well...
Well, after few hours, a friend asked me to go with him to a small gathering, giving the fact that he just took the driver`s licence...and there, after spending the few money I had in my pocket, I realised that, once again, I didn`t belong there...
Tomorrow? I have to go to work, do a lot of paperwork, not eat for a long period of time, try to stay focus, try to go to a cemetary, watch to see if my father is ok, find out how much an eye operation will gonna cost for my grandmother`s operation on the day after tomorrow...and so on...
So, have a nice week everyone! Enjoy life while you can!
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