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This darkened room,

with it's faint light,

illuminates as a deep

grey against the walls.

The faint sound of falling rain;

the sound of it soothing me,

carrying me away into a

different world, to a different time,

to a different place;

where I am confined

to it's remembrance...



The sound of your voice,

the look in your eyes...

The moment of when you looked at me,

and I couldn't look back...

{Holding me back; your holding me back...

I have to escape, I can't look back... Damnable compassion amongst

curdled tears...}

Your continuous, nervous glances

And unspoken words that

lie hidden among the gloom;

for this, I know, is where your

lamentation lingers and secretly looms...



Am I really real?. Was I really

Real to you?.

Or am I simply a

figment of your imagination?.

Of what you thought that I was...

No; You don't see me, and you don't know

Me.

That longing... A longing for who you

Thought that I was, or should be;

But never really me.



For although your desire was strong,

your feelings

Never ran as deep...



Weary of the tears,

and sick of the burning pain,

I have finally cut the ties that bind...

The ties that bound me to you.



No, I'm not what you want.

I'm what you think that you want,

Simply because of who you want me

To be...

A life of pain, control and misery

Would soon contain me...



I will not let this be.



For if we were ever to "love,"

Then we would both

be damned to fall.





This is what was,

what is,

and what will be



Eternally.