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Tonight, I've been myself.

Tonight, I've met someone who likes me for me.

Tonight, I started burning incense again even at the protest of my boyfriend who hates the smell. I still like it.

Tonight I tried an experiment which got interrupted but I'm still going to try.

Tonight I watched a movie that I hadn't in a long time.

Tonight I realized that being myself is something I should be true to.

Tonight, someone showed me and helped me understand who I am...



Tonight... Tonight is my first night as myself, and tomorrow shall be the first day... From then on... I shall be myself...

Ok guys, normally I am not a ranter. You can ask the people around me, I will sit and listen and keep my thoughts to myself. Yet today has been one of those days where I just say "FUCK YOU!" to my conscience and plan to let spew a few things that have been on my mind lately.



Firstly, if I am sick and I have to go to work EXPECT me to be bitchy. Don't say "Wow you're a bitch today" or "cheer up emo kid". All I will do is give you the death glare, return to my call and give you shit for it later. I cannot hear out of my left ear due to an infection and I have sinus drainage which is also causing me a sinus headache. GO FIGGURE if I do not want to sit there and answer your 1 billion questions about why you cannot fix this call and what I would do to fix it. Just FUCK OFF.



Secondly, when I come home, I will want to lay down and play on my laptop and just take it easy. I don't want my boyfriend to come up and start bitching at me because I bought incense with my $25 gift card from work (I got rewarded for my stats which was the only good thing that happened today) and so I bought myself a few things. Just because I didn't buy my boyfriend anything with MY reward money does not make me a bad person. And it also does not make me a bad person if I want to burn incense. Yeah it pisses you off, but you don't see me comming down and turning off your movies when I don't like listening to them. At least show me the same damn courtesy.



Lastly, it is pretty sad that the only people who know me best is my brother (who I love with my entire heart and he is the best), my mentor and master (he is no longer on the Rave but he is still included) and my two supervisors at work. So the rest of my family and even my own boyfriend do not know me well enough to keep distance when I am sick if they do not want to unleash the living hell that is going on inside my mind. It is like the other people do not even see that I am one inch away from just bashing their fucking skulls into the desk in front of me.



*she breathes in deeply and out with a sigh* Now that I got that out of my mind, how may I help you?

Joy.. Level 16... So close to level 20 that I am getting Coven invites. Let me start by saying this: I HAVE NOTHING AGAINST THE PEOPLE WHO ARE SENDING INVITES.



Only reason I decline is because between work and my personal life I am not on enough to meet "post requirements" or any other requirements that need to be met.



Even if I do get force inducted into a coven I probably wouldn't post. Just letting everyone know straight up, if I do get force inducted into your coven and you send me a message welcoming me.. This IS what you will get back



"Nice to meet you as well, however due to my personal life and work I doubt I'll be able to post as per the requirements in your coven. If you want to keep me that's perfectly fine but just be aware I will not be doing much"

COMMENTS

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CarnelianMyst
01:03 Jan 17 2012

You might want to try getting into a House. They have no such requirements, are very welcoming, and calmer in general. Check mine out, La Bella Oscuridad, and let me know if you would be interested in joining us. We'd love to have you!

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