I've got nothing original in my head
my thoughts are dead
it's already been said.
I've lost my inspiration
I'm afraid to look to closely in the dark
It's too hard to start
I can't find anything motivating
and i'm too used to waiting
noting in this life feels free anymore
there is nothing in my brain
i long ago finished going insane
i'd have to do drugs
to feel like myself again
i have no identity
i gave up long ago
on getting free
cuz what's the point of being free
when there's nowhere interesting to go?
all that creativity is for someone else
i put my dreams on the shelf
and when i wasn't looking
someone came in the nite
and stole them away
all that's left inside of me
is an endless agony
of vague wanting
but not knowing what it is
anymore.
i know longer have thoughts in my head
they stopped making sense those things i said
and i'm nothing but the living dead
and i've forgotten how to fall asleep.
i'm gripped by moments of unreality
blind panic
anger
a homicidal fantasy
why the fuck doesn't life add up
to identifiable reality?
my words have no rhythm
i lost my soul
i have no ambition to move me anymore
each step i take
leads to further disaster
the harder i try
the more chaos swirls faster
help i can't see!
my vision is failing
i don't know why this grief
is hailing
down
on me.
it seems i've been writing the same page repeatedly
in different ways
played to contrast
but really the same.
i'm lost
alone
pissed off
confused
i never know what the fuck to do
i'm to old too just blindly believe
but look to young to know what's good for me
my thoughts don't match my personality
nor do they match the outside of me
why this fear?
is it because when i sought the Truth
i realized this is the biggest Illusion of all?
no one likes my attitude
i'm not sure What i've got to prove
so i just don't bother to.
what difference does it make anyway?
i have no roots
i've lost good friends
i'm all alone at the end
no one to trust
i've got no faith
always looking behind me
sick of being afraid
slowly dying inside
consumed by rage
not sure how much more i can take
nothing clicks
or falls into place
just more chaos as i fall further from grace
i used to hope i used to dream
i used to care and have beliefs
i thought i knew where i wanted to go
who knew i could sink this low?
my life feels empty
what's in it for me?
everywhere i look
people have given up
and now
i too
no longer
give a fuck
COMMENTS
-