Dream: Adopting a Taiwanese child18:11 Apr 26 2013
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I sure had a weird dream lately and not just once, every time I loose myself in the depths of my sleep, with the drought I made myself.
It is something I am sure I made an oath not to have any children. Reason is cause I am scared I will turn out like father extremely over possessive, and arrogant, or vain and negligent like mother. I am afraid to turn out like one of them or both together which is being a super nasty monster. The more I will try not to be like them, there is a chance I might become like them. Or like Aunts, nagging and never minding my own business. More to add I got one hell of a LONG LIST of issues to solve in myself. Children will suffer with me.
But then I am dreaming myself at age 28 or 29, me ADOPTING a child. Can you believe that???
I was walking alone in the green area, meaning in the country-side, where anyone can hardly know if you are alive, in case you got attacked or raped and being abandoned there. Kind of peaceful and nice place but yet creepy too if that stuff happened for real. Anyways………… I was there and I decided to shield myself for a bit from the rain, as it has starting to fall down a bit heavy and inside in this two room small hut like there was something weird, wrapped up in the blanket and I could see a head. I went cold inside and was trembling inside. Then in an instant I froze, when I saw it moving. It was not so small but either big. it was size of a sack of potato.. I..heard a small faint of cry from the blanket….. then slowly and very cautious I crawled towards the blanket wrapped thing and I started to unwrap it slowly and careful.. you might never know what it could do. Human or not when it’s scared and wanting to live, it could do really anything to protect itself, so you can’t really blame it, right? The more I unwrap the blanket the more I was sure it was a small human. like a kid? And indeed it was a kid. It was dirty, looking pale and sick, young boy. From the eyes he looked Asian only that do not know from which country he was. I took him with me, at home with my car……….Yes I got my license and a car. I cleaned him, fed him and gave me my old clothes that I never got rid off when I was a kid cause It held a very important memory in them.
I never told the authorities or anything. One day a Chinese person came to my house to bring me some food and saw the boy, it was a week after I found him. He asked him a question in Cantonese, but the boy, remained silent and then My friend tried again in Mandarin this time and the boy looked at him and smiled and replied back and then Lee asked me where I found him and the boy told him, that I saved him, and adopted him. My Chinese friend Yao, told me the boy is Taiwanese. So basically I became a parent without even knowing the fact. I did not tell the authorities cause I did not want the child to be sent to an institute or a cold place where no one cares about him or just sending him to a family with full of money but no heart in them. I kept him, raised him and Became officially his parent. My family told me, I will fail, cause I do not have a proper way of taking care of myself, let alone raising a child. But the child that I decided to call him Cheng-Wei Shou. meaning : Cheng is Honest, and Wei means, great, Shou means Defender.
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