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sings : if your happy and you know it

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atyourwindow
06:23 Dec 30 2009

*sings* smash a paw...if your happy and ya know it smash a paw.....oh wait!....i mean clap your hands hehe

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LadyDarkRayne
18:07 Dec 30 2009

ah huh meanie.....

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refrains from getting mushy but I am the happiest rachy in all of the world !

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atyourwindow
04:45 Dec 27 2009

why is that dear?

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LadyDarkRayne
04:56 Dec 27 2009

0.o as if you have to ask meanie lol

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As of today I have. Stepped down as Coven Mistress of Atrum Templum. I leave my coven in the hands of Atyourwindow. I will NOT be coming back as coven mistress. The coven is now his to run as he sees fit. It was my choice to do this as I need to take a break and just walk away from here for a while. I know the coven is in good hands and we have a very close coven. I have just had enough and its time to move on for a while. All the petty bickering and drama eventually takes its toll and with. Everything else I have on my plate right now....I just don't need the added stress. I may pop in from time to time to check messages and coven affairs, but that's about it.

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MasterMindedFate
06:52 Dec 20 2009

time to play with the big boys i see and leave the coven b.s behind,completely understandable

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ladySnowStrixx
15:44 Dec 20 2009

Well, Even though You haven;t spoken to me for some reason , I will miss you and I,m Sorry to see you Go But I understand why and I hope you Do get better and all is well.Love you still and Prays to the Goddess for you to bet better.

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Isis101
20:50 Dec 20 2009

Wow. Well, I hope all goes well for you! Take care of yourself!

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Nightgame
00:34 Dec 21 2009

It's important for you to take care of yourself and sometimes walking away for a nice break is the right thing to do. Take care and I hope the new year brings you wonderful things including relaxation.

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Spiritwalker
02:48 Dec 24 2009

Take care of yourself sis...... I know that you will read this in time so please keep me posted on how YOU are doing. AYW will take care of the coven there is no doubt's about that one. :) No matter where you go or anything else I will be here sending you my prayers and love sis. Big hugs.

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Desperate for changing starving for truth I fall more and more everday, but never have I been more happier to fall, because I know that's its right and I. Am not afraid. All the things I have held onto I have let go of. And waiting for the next move... matters not how long that will be because once you have searched so long. ... time sort of stands still when you know what it is that you want... that may not make sense to some people but that doesn't. Matter it makes sense to me. Things that I may have lacked before I have gained 3 fold in other ways. Sometimes you have to just live for the day and for for what you know to be true. When life decides to hand you a Rummy hand in a poker game well you make do with what you have and believe Lady Luck is watching over your shoulder. I can't let petty things. Effect my emotions as they have because all it does is add to the pain I'm already in.. and its not that I can't manage the pain... I chose to deal with it in my own way.



I don't care anymore I really don't I have been quiet for the last day or so because this all has made me sicker then I have felt in a long time and I just don't need it anymore... changes are being made and well that's just how it is. This has/had been my place to escape to. But its more of a headache then I need or want so I do feel a break is needed because I don't need any of this... I care not who likes me or who hates me.... I am my own person and the people that are in my life that I talk to on a daily basis beyond the walls of this site. Know how to reach me if needed as for the rest....... people come into your life like a warm summer breeze and leave like a tornado but everyone leaves you with a impression.



Faith is. The belief in something more than what you know.... you've got to play the cards you've got who knows what Fate is holdin at times you've got to go with out knowing where your going..... and that time has come.

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Spiritwalker
05:12 Dec 17 2009

Big hugs sis you will do just fine.... Follow your instincts on this one.

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Theban
16:13 Dec 17 2009

Friendships come and go...some of them go with a piece of ones heart. The person never knowing what effect they had, or how enjoyable one found there company.

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LadyDarkRayne
16:45 Dec 17 2009

Yes that was exactly my closing point.

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When is enough enough ? When do you get to the point that. Your sick of the things that. Continue to occur , even though you have no control over 75 % of it.. but for the remaining 25% ill be damned if I am going to let this be. The part that makes me just say screw it. I'm absolutley exhausted but don't seem to sleep my mind is racing this week has been a nightmare. And I certainly. Don't need anything else to sneak up on me and catch me off guard.... - have had all my xmas shopping done except for two things but I needed to get Alex his big present first... the other two things well as said it doesn't have to at christmas especially when its from the heart...



My family is all walking on egg shells around me right now ... and it just makes me think of why and it just causes more pain... I can't help it that I miss my mom she was the only one who ever believed in me and was always on myside and now that she's gone. I feel empty in certain ways. Idk I really just don't know anything anymore... two things are always certain... how I feel about someone and that your children will always love you no matter what.

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Freyja
11:46 Dec 14 2009

*hugs Rachy* Wish I could help you and chase all the assholes away.

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I wish I could sleep...but between being in pain and. Being worried about things from earlier tonight... idk... I don't know what kind of answer I was lookin for... but I guess I jkust need to hear something... the waiting is always the worst and yes it does stir up some fears... I just for once want to hear... everything looks great... but nope I don't and its really depressing... I accept the fact that its going to take time.. but I also hate. It... sure hearing its going to be ok is great and all but when I'm scared and I wake up frommhorrifying nightmares that I wake up and can't walk. Is sad and yes makes me feel pretty alone even though. I'm not so to speak...I've got. The people that love me and want me to get better... but do you know how discouraging it is ?

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ladySnowStrixx
23:33 Dec 11 2009

I,m so sorry Sweetie, i wish I could be there with you To help you through this , but I know deep down you,ll get better and make it . I try to say a small prayer for you each day and will continue to do so , My heart goes with you.

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XxJannellieJuicexX
00:06 Dec 12 2009

Love ya sis...

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What the hell is wrong with people... do you see me telling your significant other shit? No I. Listen to what they have to say but listening and them acting on it are two very seperate things.



Yes I vent when. I'm pissed off.... but don't think for a minute that - I don't tell him what's bothering me.



I'm pissed off that I am sick all the time .... I hate the treatment them have me on... my emotions are all over the place... and ya know what if I want to vent I am going to.... if you ask. Me what's wrong... and I say what's on my mind. How is that later thrown in. As bringing drama ? Can't tell you how many times I have listened to others not because I had to but because well gee isn't. That what friends do...?





To take a forum thread and instigate. Gee is that not starting drama ? Wtf. You wanted to see how he - would respond for his. Benefit are you fucking serious ? And then to say you won't say anymore because you know I tell him everything.... well that's pretty contradicting don't ya think ? And of course I tell him everything.



Trying to get a reaction out of someone because you feel they need to get somewthing off their chest..........pretty manipulating. If you ask me.............





I am fucking done........ I am sick of all of this...........I have had enough things going on with me to. Have. To deal with to have this bullshit again and. Again.



So the next time you decide you want to play God with other peoples lives take some of your own advice .... pulls the knife out and drops it on the floor, so let me ask how's it feel to have the blood on your hands, quickest way to kill a friendship is to lodge the knife in when their back is turned.

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Oceanne
18:39 Dec 10 2009

Oh UGH..some peeps.

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atyourwindow
18:51 Dec 10 2009

well said dear.

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nobodysfallenangel
19:13 Dec 10 2009

That or if they try to only be in your life so that you can be their friend, and receive the benefits of wonderful you guys! I don;t understand why people even bother trying to be friends with anyone anymore.Keep the ones I have, and that understand me, and maybe try again in a few years lol.

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ladySnowStrixx
00:18 Dec 11 2009

Sweetie, don't let them get to you , they aren't worth it , We all know Relationships are hard , and being sick only makes it worse , if they were a true friend they would be there for you right now trying to comfort you and not hurt you by saying shit to upset you. That is not a Friend . You are a Sweet and Caring person And what goes on between you and AYW is no ones business and no one has the right to use what you say in private against you. THEY SUCK!!

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Freyja
02:47 Dec 11 2009

Well, sis, you know as well as I do that some people are Drama whores and can't STAND for others to be happy when they are not, so what do they do? They try and make the rest of them as miserable as they are. All we can do is ignore them and pretend they don't exist.

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atyourwindow
06:15 Dec 11 2009

heh, isnt that the pot calling the kettle black lol

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What a weird day it has been today... finally slept really good last night...strange dreams again





I logged into facebook earlier and got this long message from a girl I went to high school with and how much she envied me. Because I went and did as I wanted had the friends and The Guy got to talking to her told. Her omg you envied me because of that ?



Talk about a trip down memory lane... did that ever stir up some emotions......... ya I may have had all that and then some.... but most of that was just materialistic lol except for the guy....I got him all on my own ....



Wow... did we ever throw some wild parties... funny how that was one thing that I am remembered for.... and showing up on horseback lol omg I had forgotten about some of those parties....



Really needed a good laugh today and taking a trip down memory lane brought tears and laughs but if it were not for some of those events. I wouldn't be the person I am today



Felt good to hear that someone looked up to me when everything was in shambles when he died...and I some how held it together consoling friends as I'm trying to hold back dying inside after losing. Someone I loved so much after just losing our daughter... *wipes tears away* but things happen for a reason. And I have. Been shown that many times since then.

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atyourwindow
00:36 Dec 09 2009

true dear *kisses*

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LadyDarkRayne
03:36 Dec 09 2009

Yes dear... you always know just what to say. *kisses*

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Listens to Pink Floyd. Wish. You were. Here

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birra
20:48 Dec 08 2009

Awesome.



One of the best LP's ever.

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LadyDarkRayne
21:02 Dec 08 2009

I remember seeing them play at. Buffalo in. Geez I think it was 87 lol

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VAMPIREBLONDEE
02:11 Dec 09 2009

ooh..I love Pink Floyd...especially that song Comfortably Numb.

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Theban
16:56 Dec 17 2009

I love Floyd

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I am trying to get everyone that I had on my journals list re added again... so if ya add me to yours I will do the same... majority of the time I'm. Mobile but I will add ya... just send me a message if you have added me ; ]



Hope everyone is having a great day

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atyourwindow
19:46 Dec 08 2009

ok added dear hehe

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And then there was silence...

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Serenity
16:12 Dec 01 2009

-cricket sound-

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atyourwindow
20:25 Dec 01 2009

( )..........

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ladySnowStrixx
22:15 Dec 07 2009

Sweetie, are you ok?

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Theban
16:18 Dec 17 2009

No I hear footsteps...scratching noises... ^^

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