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At midnight when I wake.

I look at the clock and say,

“ding dong, ding dong, will I wake or will I sleep.

Will I live another day?

Or will my tormented soul be taken away?

Will this nightmare ever end? Will I wake?

Will I be thrown to the lakes of fire from heavens open door?

Will I be drained of all blood and burned at the stake?

Will any one put a wooden cross throw my heart?

Will a silver bullet be shot into my head?

Will my heart stop beating?

Will my brains turn into to soup?

Will my skin turn to toxic waste?

Will my blood boil and turn into turpentine?

Will the moon stay hidden?

Will it stay dark for eternity? Will I hear another soul cry for help?

Will I sing another song?

Will I ever be able to cry sad tears agene? Will I ever feel pain again? Or, will I never shed a tear again?

Will they be all dried up?

Will I always be numb? Will I ever feel pain? Is their any way out? Will I fell again?...”

After saying that at midnight.

I walks out side, close the door, I look up at the moon.

I sigh and go back inside,

go to my room, and fall asleep,

just to wake for another day.

Another day, full of pain.

The words I speak and write have meanings,

More meanings that one can imagine.

I use words to confuse each person,

To hide my true feelings from each individual,

I keep writing and singing my words,

To keep my self from falling apart.

So I can continue to protect my hidden feelings from the world,

I feel so much pain,

that no one sees.

I hade each emotional scar,

As if it was never there,

I use words and sounds to hide each scar,

Just like I use make up to cover the real scars on my arms.

I’ll keep hiding them for as long as I can,

in tell that person comes along again,

And sees right though my lies,

Through my words and sounds.

and finds out the riddle.

He came once.

And he left,

causing more pain than before,

But he knows,

He knows what he has done,

Ill wait for him to return,

To break my words and walls,

Just as he did, before

He will all ready know the riddle,

But there’s a new one now.

This time it’s more complicated than before.

COMMENTS

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whoknows
08:09 Aug 11 2012

I loved this.

It is quite a powerful piece, and I can tell it's from the heart.

Please never stop writing.

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POST COMMENT

I’m a blank slate.

Can’t think of any thing.

Lost in my mind.

The deeper I fall,

I fall into a hole.

A hole inside of my mind.

That only I can return,

It’s calm and collective,

Peaceful and sweet.

I thought no place like this existed.

But I was wrong.

It may not be,

On earth nor in site.

But it’s deep with in,

With in us all.

It’s our safe place.

That only ourselves,

Can go.

I’m sick of feeling down

I know I’m not the only one

I try my best to keep

A smile on my face

I guess I’m just weak.

Frowning at this time

So take me by your hand

And show me a world that I can understand.

Keep me from self harm

Pull me out of the dark

I cant do this alone

I have to have some help

Don’t let me paint a twisted picture

With a razor blade in hand

Don’t let me draw on my wrists

It’ll only make things worse

Among my scarred and twisted soul.

Only if I had you

To pull me out of the dark

To keep me from self harm

To show me a world that I can understand

It’s true

I cant do this alone

So I will paint a twisted picture

With a razor blade in hand

And ill draw on my wrists

And make things worse

Among my scarred and twisted soul.