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5 entries this month
Gone Again
08:27 Feb 25 2006
Times Read: 541
Here again,
without you in my soul,
without you at all,
I had what many people never have,
and now it's gone,
true love is it real,
or is it just something people say,
is it something we feel,
or is it something we believe,
if only I could trust someone in the way I trust you,
if only you knew the love I feel for you,
if only you knew I wanted you,
I fear being alone,
I fear being lost,
I fear being here again.
Why Me?
08:24 Feb 25 2006
Times Read: 542
Why is it always me?
The one who tries and gets stuff done,
the person who has a shot at life,
yet they don't care wether I live or die,
all they want is me to be gone,
away forever and in not to long,
the fear of being alone is back,
always trying, laping it up as fast as I can,
yet they still don't care that I am here,
she talks to me like their's nothing wrong,
a mother in need of another son,
one who wont leave so fast and wrong,
she feels as if I am a mistake from god,
one who wouldn't ever belong,
another step on the way to her life,
I even got accepted to PLU,
she didn't care,
didn't even have a clue,
I cried that night and wanted to die,
but I held on,
for the one I love is by my side,
she talked so softly in my ear,
wanting me to know that she was their,
I still cry here and their,
but now I know you'll always be their.
Another curse from what I've seen,
are the problems that I have not seen,
I try my hardest,
and I try my best,
but I fear that's not what it'll be,
they tell me I'm here,
all alone I don't trust them for I should know,
you stand next to me and never faulter,
it's not what I feared that I should alter,
you kept me safe, warm and quiet,
never to look back, for I was cryin,
thank you so much but I still have to ask,
why is it me who has to pass?
Why do I have to try so hard,
to impress the one who I had feared,
my mother the one that doesn't care,
all she said was I don't care.
I try and try but I never succeed,
for she has something against me,
I dno't know why and I don't know how,
all I know is that it's that bad now,
please help me to find the way,
to a better place where people are proud of me.
Whats wrong?
08:17 Feb 25 2006
Times Read: 544
It's like something came from afar,
to bring me down like a blast from befre,
another dawn of fear and tears,
it's like someone brought a fire to their eyes,
someone from before,
the thought of everyone being gone again,
and trying to through it out without me knowing,
I know that I love her and I want it to last,
but once again it's comming back to last,
the thought of being alone,
of being without her,
being all by myself for another time without the one I love,
I don't know how do this,
whats wrong with this world,
whats wrong with this place?
Why is it like somone needs to take my place?
I don't know how,
and I don't know when,
but I do know that I just can't take eit,
I need to know just whats going on,
I love you and it feels like you're drifting upon,
your own little world your own place,
afar without me,
afar without us,
without your love I don't know how,
and I don't know when,
but it's a ways away,
and I just can't stand,
without you here it makes me fear,
just what I need to know to live.
I hope you understand just what I mean,
if you don't then it just can't be,
I'm sorry I didn't call,
I'm sorry I wasn't their,
I'm sorry for leaving,
It's just not fair,
you say you love me,
you say you care,
but how do I know,
with what I dare,
I hope to hear from you so soon,
and yet I try to be what you need me to be,
I love you so and I love you forever,
I'll see you soon,
and I'll be here forever.
All alone
08:14 Feb 25 2006
Times Read: 546
It's like I'm all alone when your gone,
and I'm all alone,
you have made me what I am,
and yet I just can't stand when your gone,
I feel so wrong when you leave,
and you might not know,
that I love you so,
yet I feel all alone,
no matter how close or far you are,
I feel all alone,
I know it's wrong,
but I can't make it change,
so I don't know what to do,
without you.
Not That You're Here
08:09 Feb 25 2006
Times Read: 547
You were just standing their talking,
suddenly it struck like a flash of lightning,
over you with the force that was frightning,
you fell to the ground and I didn't know what was happening,
I tried to keep you calm and you still went down,
I didn't know what to do,
but I stayed and followed,
to the hospital where I would call,
you tried so many times and I didn't know how,
but you kept me calm through the pain and doubt,
I didn't know if ither of you were going to be ok,
but I kept the faith and it made it all ok,
as you stand their beside me all night long,
worrying and thoughful of all that has gone wrong,
I didn't know how and didn't know when,
but it was their within,
your loving heart,
has always been right their with me,
and without a doubt,
you saved me more than once and again tonight,
without anything more than with the hug of life,
you brought me back after a minute or so,
it was amazing how I couldn't breath so,
I didn't know how and I didn't know when,
you were coming back to be their again,
a week will go by without you here,
and I don't know how I will survive,
your life is mine and mine is yours,
without you I would be blind,
like a man with no name is nameless,
and a mother with no child is once again alone,
without you I wouldn't be here,
without you I would be dead,
on the side of the road with a gash in my wrists,
as the pain coarses through me like another old day,
I live here today because of your pain,
you suffered with me for a long time too,
and now I'm here to say I love you,
to breath with you and help you out too,
the favor is given a new,
a title a name someone with that sight,
to bring about this loving day,
thank you so much for being the one,
to keep me alive,
for whats done is done,
the scars will fade,
the sorrow will die,
and with it gone,
other men lie,
but not me for since you came,
I will live with you in me again,
thank you for your patients it has helped me so,
and now I can go far further than most,
and you have helped me be more than most,
you live in me and I in you,
the loving spirit of 1 and 1 makes 2.
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